Mad

In the first stanza I really like your choice of words. Things such as static, quavering etc, create a strong picture. Having "Snap" by itself on the last line is ...

First of all, the story sounds good. It's an interesting enough beginning and I get a good sense of whats happening. You've got a few errors around - I won't ...

Well the imagery is very good as always with your poems but the meaning is beyond me. For ever I would murder my temple, This first line leaves me quite ...

The rhyme, when you use it is fairly effective and doesn't seem forced. The rhythm at times is a bit sketchy and doesn't flow brilliantly. The lines in your second ...

It's a very nice piece, the description is great and really helps to convey the meaning that you are trying to get across. A hooded figure Rushed to my side ...

It's an OK piece. The rhythm is steady and that makes it nice and easy to read. It seems to be lacking something because it doesn't have any real passion ...

Not much I can say that hasnt been said. For me, as a personal preference, I think that you need to add a bit more to the beginning. It comes ...

I think the final stanza is what really throws the message that you had been creating because there is no foundation for the sudden change in emotion from cringing at ...

Well, I don't want to repeat what other people have said, but I just wanted to add that while some of the rhyme is a bit difficult to read it ...

I think that it is all very nicely described, and that creates a strong mood for your poem, while also making it very easy to visualise. I think one thing ...

I think that this is really, really good. The second stanza works really well, the way you cut up the lines (I think it's called lineation?) seems uneven and that ...

The sweat upon my skin crusts like blood tonight, as your guitar picks itself within the ribs of my head. I like the imagery, it's very powerful. The "guitar picks ...

the warm haze, a familiar feeling the glow and fuzz behind my face i'd approach you with eyes glazed wish I could die in your embrace I rather like this ...

That first stanza He has a window with no glass, a ceiling with no beams, a sky made out of canvas. Is really very good I think that it captures ...

It's a beautiful poem. I can't really suggest much for it, just point out some bits that I really liked. What do you remember most? she asked. Sex, I said, ...