Justagirl

I’ve still retained a shred of dignity. But I’ve still retained a shred of dignity. Or: At least I’ve still retained a shred of dignity. When I first came in ...

Than laying on the almost-green grass , Watching flowers bloom , Under an early-spring sun . Than laying on the almost-green grass This is really... Out. It puts you off ...

Even today when I listen to those songs it brings in old memories along. "brings in" is a little awkward, try something else like: "bring along" Were they false or ...

Heya!! Wonderful poem!! I've actually written something longer that's almost like this... ;) The only thing that this needs is punctuation !!! There is no punctuation *tsks*, go through it ...

This is an okay chapter. I think you do way to much telling in this chapter - it's sort of an overload for my brain, try to put it in ...

Well, this is another ok chapter... I think you do a bit to much telling and this chapter is mostly dialogue. Although, it's a short chapter so I guess the ...

Hi there!! If you made this a poem it would be AWESOME - I think. If you wrote this because you actually did want attention then PM me!! Let's get ...

It's raining again. I love this line :D l eaving tiny tracks of water l ike a line of weary ants, traveling far away. I wonder where you are , ...

Nice job Sar-Sar. I'm so sorry but I must... Give you my whole opinion. It needs more emotion. I know it would be hard but pretty much the only emotion ...

I needed to stay alert in these types of places. Alcohol helps you relax , not stay awake. I ignored him, but I stole a glance back at him. Um... ...

Whoa, this is so nice, so touching! I love it!! Very well done, I hope I can write lyrics like you someday... I also love the name very much... Ice ...

The car revs his engine, and speeds faster down the ghost highway. It would be smoother if this went " The 's engine is revved as it speeds faster down ...

She has eyes never seen before , d eep navy blue that everyone will adore . Her pale light skin ever so smooth and soft , it c an attract ...

So instead she swayed lightly , her feet just grazing the ground. After around five minutes she decided she wanted to meet the little boy, lightly she jumped off the ...

The sea. Where all his troubles Have no choice But to flee. This is my favorite part. Very nice poem!! Well written with great description. The only thing that could ...