Junel

Hey, I guess I never actually reviewed this and just read it. Anyway here you go. Grammatical Etc. errors: The slabs of white marble looked endless. And slippery. This should ...

Hey, this is a great chapter. Grammatical Etc. errors: still wearing the cloths she Cloths should be clothes. The bell rang,and we began quickly A space needs to be added ...

Hey, another great chapter. Grammatical Etc. errors: “Now, it’s your turn,” snarled Taylor. Dakota put his hands up. “Well then, if you insist.” Taylor made a feral growling at the ...

Hey, this is great. Grammatical Etc. errors: you're stumbling aroun d on the The space here needs to be deleted. Thursdays and completely I believe that you meant to say ...

Hey, this is a great start! Grammatical Etc. errors : I'm about a months and a half away Month shouldn't be plural. "Very funny but you can give up the ...

Hey, another wonderful chapter! Grammatical Etc. errors: As far as I saw there are no errors in this chapter! Characters: So you are continuing to develop your character's well so ...

Hey, great job! Grammatical Etc. errors: getting out of the situation ahead of her, So here you should just take off of her because you already said it was her ...

Hey, I'm loving this story! Grammatical Etc. errors: There was nothing that I saw, so great job. Characters: We continue to learn about Rita and how she reacts to her ...

Hey, great job! Grammatical Etc. errors: They messed with the wrong people, So this thought should be in present tense because we think in present tense when it's that moment. ...

Hey, this is really interesting and cool. Grammatical Etc. errors: It was such a peaceful scenery. I feel like this sentence would be just fine and even flow better is ...

Hey, lovely as always. Grammatical Etc. errors: with a shoot smudged face smiling down Should be soot not shoot. “We’re going to a hospital I assume. This should be a ...

Hey, so I realized I seem to have forgotten to review this chapter. But anyway, good job! Grammatical Etc. errors: angry as leveled his pistol They should be added in ...

Hey, great as always! Grammatical Etc. errors: that you couldn’t see the rock. This sentence seems to end early. Did you mean to say that they couldn't see the rock ...

Hey, this is very well written. Your use of your knowledge and understanding of the world really shows through. You use lots of figurative language and a strong vocabulary. Both ...

Hey, Grammatical Etc. errors: minutes before showing Showing should be showed because it happened in the past so you should use past tense. removing the hands from Because these are ...