Ieatworms

This was good, but I'm not sure if I am supposed to take it seriously or not. The title and changes in font highlight the ridiculousness of throwing frozen peas ...

Mostly, very good. A few of the ship allusions felt forced, but the overall running metaphor was very effective. My nit pick: "The ocean was my God of love my ...

I read it once, and hated it. Read it again, and started to understand it. Read it again, and liked it. I'd take out the exaggerated spacing. I was expecting ...

I really liked this- the feeling, the twist at the end, the tone. Boy have I been there. I want to caution you, though. Do you want this to make ...

Wow. I feel like you have three, very strong poems here. You have a powerful voice. I especially like the last stanza. I'd like to see each stylistic part expanded ...

Wow... I've seen so many of this kind of story, going to a Catholic school. You win. Yours made me cringe the most. Especially raping your mom with the knife. ...

You have many strong images and very memorable lines. My favorites include: ” Note to self: pens don't work upside down Note to self: Wash your hair tomorrow” “Too much ...

I, too, found the chainsaw confusing. I liked the last two stanzas so much, I can't tell you which is my favorite... Lovely. One grammatical note: You seem to add ...

I like your creative simile, and how you kept it up. I found the spacing irksome, however. Generally, you seperate one line from a block of lines for emphasis. The ...

I like that you started each line with a subject that describes an aspect of yourself. However, the first two lines ended with a locational description (outside, behind), but the ...

This feels very Jane-Austin. I imagine that it is going to belong in the romance section, assuming something in stirring between Emily and the hunk. You picked up the pace ...

I was distracted from your strong images, effective literary devices, and clear dipiction by an impulse to poke my computer screen where I wanted to put periods. If you use ...

I like the simple outdoorsy feel of this. You did a good job of isolating the images that would make this a clear representation of your scene. That's hard to ...

As for the title, "The Instrument" came to mind. It implies that the words are using you to express themselves, and you used that word in your last few lines. ...

I like the sweetness and whimsy of this piece. Small note: the elipses (...) are unnecessary. Big note: You switched from talking about yourself to addressing "you". Was this intentional? ...