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Harker

in the semblance of a man

  • Poetry » General, General Re: Jasper

    Hello, LiaLia! IronSpark here. I just wanted to give some overall thoughts here. I think that this poem is good, but some of the rhymes are very forced. Why did ...

    Sep 20, 2014
  • Lyrics » Lyrical, Realistic Re: To My Limits

    Heya, WindSailor. IronSpark here for a really (and I mean really) quick review. Here we go... Wow, this is great. I was just wondering if you could use a bit ...

    Sep 17, 2014
  • Other » Dramatic, General Re: A Field of Gold and Red

    Hello, MarbleToast! IronSpark here. I don't have much time, so I'm going to just say two general things: Good job with your description! I like how you used "baby blue", ...

    Sep 17, 2014
  • Poetry » Realistic, Teen Fiction Re: I Never Want to Be Beautiful

    Comment: Hello, Defyingravity01! IronSpark here. I only have two things. 1. "Even as I dress differently,/even as my acne just begins to clear up./Even as I put effort into/losing weight./I'm ...

    Sep 17, 2014
  • Short Story » Realistic, General Re: Is Everything Okay Upstairs- How Cowboy Boots Can Change Your Life

    Hello, Kelpies! IronSpark here. So here are my nitpicks: 1. Sometimes you double space after periods, sometimes you don't. It has to be consistent. 2. You say "And then we ...

    Sep 17, 2014
  • Poetry » Dramatic, Other Re: So Sad the Place

    Hello, TheCardsHaveNoMemory (great username, by the way)! I'm just gonna nitpick a bit, if that's okay with you. Heeeeerrrrreeee we go... :D 1. Why is everything capitalized after the comma? ...

    Sep 16, 2014
  • Short Story » Action / Adventure, Other Re: Lost Out at Sea

    Hello there! IronSpark here. Because (unfortunately) I don't have a lot of time, I'm just going to cover some general points. I like your use of imagery and voice. However, ...

    Sep 14, 2014
  • Poetry » Dramatic, Realistic Re: The Prophecy of the Red Giant

    Hello there! IronSpark here for another review. This is an intense poem. I especially like the lines "Dragging itself across/The vault of the heavens," However, some of your punctuation and ...

    Sep 14, 2014
  • Article / Essay » General, General Re: I have Writer's block

    Hello there. IronSpark here. Um... okay. So you seem to like writing "funny" things, which seem to sometimes be a waste of time. Anyway, this was kind of funny. But ...

    Sep 14, 2014
  • Poetry » General, General Re: How To Fool Innocent People Online?

    This is kind of funny, but I'm sorry--this shouldn't be on Literary Spotlight... Also, the title's incorrect. It should be: "How do you Fool Innocent People Online?" or "How to ...

    Sep 14, 2014
  • Poetry » Mystery / Suspense, Fantasy Re: Loneliness

    Hello! Sorry that this is such a short review. This is a beautiful poem. The image especially added to it. Below, @miley said that she suggested that the poem had ...

    Sep 14, 2014
  • Novel / Chapter » Dramatic, Science Fiction Re: The Face of a Borg

    Hello there! This is IronSpark. Sorry that this is so short... this piece is just so good, I didn't have much to critique. This is great! I loved your imagery--the ...

    Sep 14, 2014
  • Short Story » Realistic, General Re: The Cold Wind of Death

    Hello! IronSpark here. So this is what happened when I tried to review your piece: Hello! IronSpark here. Okay... so... I'm just gonna nitpick around a bit. Because this is ...

    Sep 13, 2014
  • Poetry » Realistic, Narrative Re: ................

    Hello there! IronSpark here. As I usually do with poetry (and basically everything) I'm going to nitpick a little. Well, a lot. Here we go... 1. Why did you decide ...

    Sep 13, 2014
  • Poetry » Humor, Teen Fiction Re: oh no!!!

    Hello there! I'm just gonna nitpick a bit, so bear with me. Sorry if some of these are out of order. Okay, here we go... 1. "Tick tok in the ...

    Sep 13, 2014


What will live longer, you or your words? Something to think about the next time you abandon a project...
— Omni