User avatar

Fand

  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Dark Child

    ...Erm. Was there a point to the colors? And even if there was, you'll find that's not really a very logical method to employ in a poem; if you managed ...

    Dec 16, 2006
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Sing, Virgilian Carmentis

    Hello, darling! I stand by everything I said about this on Fictionpress... you make me feel incompetent. In the best way possible, of course. ;) I love this poem. Then ...

    Nov 16, 2006
  • Short Story » Science Fiction, General Re: Through the Mirror /P

    Gorgeous, Brad. Truly wonderful. I spotted one typo--I think you inserted a comma instead of a period--but I can't find it now... Really, this is great. Your protagonist is so ...

    Nov 14, 2006
  • Short Story » General, General Re: My Friend John

    Fantasy of You: I have to admit, that when I first tried to read this, I quit after a few paragraphs. I came back later to finish reading it though--I ...

    Nov 14, 2006
  • Poetry » Narrative, General Re: Gandalf and The Balrog

    I believe that, in terms of the capitalization of 'ensuing,' you've got the right of it, Bjorn--especially since this is written in a very archaic style. And... I kind of ...

    Nov 12, 2006
  • Short Story » General, General Re: My very short simple story

    This is a story? *raises eyebrows skeptically* Looks more like a rant to me.... Please do not post works on this forum unless you are serious about writing. The Young ...

    Nov 11, 2006
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Addressing the Convalescent Dream-Junkie

    My my, I wonder why this sounds so familiar... :shock: :D You're welcome, by the way. :wink: First off -- typo in the title. Secondly -- and you know I ...

    Nov 1, 2006
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Welcome

    Obviously I've been reading too many of Brad's reviews, but I only have this to say: Please stop writing. Or at least put it on hold until after you've learned ...

    Oct 25, 2006
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Have you ever thought?

    Awsomwritter13, please do not flood the forums. It isn't couth. As to the poem itself, it makes little sense. What exactly are you trying to get across? At the moment ...

    Oct 25, 2006
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Your Heart

    There is really no reason for you to be in a hurry; posting pieces in the forums isn't a race. It's not like you have to contend against deadlines or ...

    Oct 25, 2006
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: No One

    The best descriptive word I can think of for this poem is "self-indulgent." Not only is it dotted with elementary grammatical and spelling mistakes ("know" should be "no," and spaces ...

    Oct 25, 2006
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: The Book I Read

    This poem is really quite sweet... I like the feeling lent to it by the "childish" narrator. It definitely cuts down on the risk of sounding cliched. Only one piece ...

    Oct 22, 2006
  • Poetry » Dramatic, General Re: Melancholy

    I'm afraid I'm more in Brad's camp than Lottie's, but I'll see if I can't give you a few more productive hints towards rewriting this. (1) Please, please, please, in ...

    Oct 22, 2006
  • Poetry » Other, General Re: Rubber Boot Blues

    How has this not been reviewed yet? Well, at least this way I'm first. *Is smug.* Now down to business... (Edit: oops, looks like I was beat to it!) This ...

    Oct 14, 2006
  • Poetry » Lyrical, General Re: Leaking Contradiction

    I'm afraid I'm going to have to side with Brad this time, Vamp. I know that writing things like this can be cathartic -- I know I've done similar things, ...

    Oct 14, 2006


Time is not your best friend - unless you use it wisely.
— Marco Pierre White