Fand

It does sound like a rap, lol. I liked it; I do think that it was a little... repetitive in its message, but at least the way you conveyed the ...

I agree that this was far too long; like I said in my last review on one of your pieces, a true poet uses fewer words, but those words are ...

I agree with Wiggy in that there are far too many adjectives in this piece; your verbs and nouns should be strong enough not to need descriptive phrases! Also: this ...

I did like this, especially the line: "And her father dissected me / with his cutlery." What a perfect way to describe that! That's one of those lines that makes ...

*Sighs.* We don't approve of plagiarism here, Bambie. I've gotten chain emails with this exact poem in it--I'd have it to prove, if I hadn't deleted it since it was ...

Once again, you rely on italics to draw the reader's eye. Bad, worse, and worst. Your grasp on the English language seems... shaky at best, especially given the line "You ...

Clau: Gee, thanks! ^^ You're making me blush. Bambie: I don't know about Clau's statement that I'm one of the best poets on here, but we certainly do have a ...

Hello, Isalena! Please observe, before I begin, that we generally encourage new members to critique more than just one piece before posting their own stuff; it's good for you, as ...

I agree, Sureal. This really WAS the perfect culmination of the series, and I loved it! The one thing I didn't like? The epilogue. I've read so many things like ...

Hm. I'd agree with the analysis of this poem as a bit overwrought. A poet is supposed to be able to say the same thing as a prose writer in ...

Actually, two hyphens equals a dash; space-hyphen-space is commonly understood, but grammatically incorrect. ^~ This wasn't bad. I'd agree with Clau, however, when she says that it didn't quite "hit ...

burnished crystals formed in compacted dirt and compacted lovers' legs and arms I love this. The last stanza was fantastic; I particularly liked the parallels between the pore imagery and ...

o0. Interesting. I didn't really like this. You have a few decent phrases ("Proverbial: / Anthems and swords / Are all I'll never need"), but on the whole this was ...

I rather liked this, and it seems Kitty's covered just about everything I found. The only thing I have to comment on: your refrain. It was very cliched and colorless ...

I agree; this is really a well-done little poem. ^^ The one thing that really put me off, though, is the spacing; why is there an empty line between each? ...