EliteHusky

Firstly here is my constructive criticism before the praise. "“I’m coming Miss Hafmon.” I replied." - This exemplifies a switch in voice from you narrating the story to a first-person ...

Firstly here is my constructive criticism before the praise. "“I’m coming Miss Hafmon.” I replied." - This exemplifies a switch in voice from you narrating the story to a first-person ...

Very well planned and executed. It flows very smoothly and the content certainly has an audience. Overall a very good poem. With that said my only bit of constructive criticism ...

"large on it’s face" - Watch wording. "Its" is more appropriate as "it's" means "it is". "so he’d be safe" - He knew he would be safe or the narrator ...

Excellent. You maintained the theme throughout the entire piece and wrote with in a coherent style. I especially liked your uses of imagery. Here are some favourites, s like navigating ...

Good start. I stumbled when it came to reading this line, Then examined the jagged edges, to see what lied there Usually when referring to the past tense it would ...

First of all, fantastic title. Secondly, equally strong conclusion. Throughout your poem you poured out your vision of a perhaps nightmarish Utopian society reminiscent of Brave New World . Yet, ...

Aaron, Jeremy, and April sulked to the truck. Jasper didn’t really seem to mind the news as much as them. It’s probably because he’s already graduated and he’s not leaving ...

A world of desert lands, Whose soulless sands devour every boy, Even those that had no single toy, Every finger, every hand that twitched, Every nail and every foot that ...

the true pain would be the events that happen before death I like this line. Annaria created her own riddle that not even she can figure out This gives good ...

“Oh my god. It’s not funny. Stop laughing, you’re horrible,” she says, and she looks at me with utter disgust. I realize now why my cheeks ache. They’re paralyzed from ...

Having read your "spoiler" where you criticized the work, let me point out some positive observations. You demonstrate a wide vocabulary and write with a level of detail that adds ...

This caught my attention, not because of the lack of reviews but because of the strong emotional outpouring you wrote that consisted of hating a great many things. I cannot ...

and laughed in his car, as I shifted it’s gears Correction: "it's" should be "its" as "it's" = it is. Overall, I liked how you channelled your creativity to make ...

Good start. Your conclusion stayed on topic and the overall theme was not too cluttered. I also liked your use of strong language or at least language that brings a ...