Please Critique This. Updated work. Started over from scratch.

Prologue

Cedrick hurriedly rolled away from the tiny, fanged creature that was zooming past him in thin air, leaping from the floor of the Archellian forest right past his left arm. Its skin was a transluscent thick layer glossed with  a natural moisture, and its beady, glowing eyes, large on it’s face, were a deep emerald. These creatures were called Exons, and alone, they were harmless, but you wouldn’t want to be within seeing distance of one swarm. Tiny, yet immensely quick, they zapped around with their little tails trailing behind them and coloring the air with a smoky white. Down flat on his stomach, Cedrick had his sword at his side, and some magic salt in a pouch that hung from his belt, which he had purchased from the Sorcerer’s Guild earlier that morning. He turned his head as he looked around him, staying low. He didn’t see the lone Exon’s swarm anywhere near him, so he’d be safe.

He pulled himself forward with his arms interchangably supporting his weight. He was almost at the point he had been looking for in the forest, which he could tell by the dusty blue markings on the trees, tinged with a faded glow. This was where the seaside creatures had been passing by after being led out of their homes by the darkly clad man. The creatures lived right near the sea of Cressantris, where the magical waters were. It was as if they had been marking the path not only for their dictator, but in the hopes that someone could follow the trail. The dusty glow of the turquoise blue marks were faded, but he could make out the shapes of letters in the seaside creatures’ language. It was most likely call for help, which the darkly clad man, their dictator, hadn’t noticed them writing on the rough, dark brown trees. If Cedrick could last a little longer, he could find out what was going on, and send a message to the gods. It was by the great blue leafed tree that he had seen the portal, in its glowing pale blue radiance. If he could reach the portal, he could finally find out what was going on.

Cedrick’s determined expression faded into a solemn dissapointed look as he looked ahead. Down a gradually declining slope, he saw the great blue leafed tree, and next to it was the portal, which nearly relieved him a great deal, except for one thing. Before the portal there lay an enormous swarm of Exons, zapping rapidly through the air. The lone exon bounced right over his head and zapped over to its swarm with a shrill, echoing shriek, it’s smoky trail leaving Cedrick to keep his head down, protected by his arm, so he didn’t choke on any of the smoke.

“Oh frick,” he muttered under his breath.

He couldn’t dodge them all off with his sword alone, so he’d have to use magic. His hand searched for the pouch of magic salt that he had hooked up to his belt. Exons were not eaters of the humans that entered their forest, but they were hungry for their vital energy. In the smoky trails produced by a swarm of Exons, a human could feel strangled. And although one Exon couldn’t suck out enough energy from a person to make a person feel remotely weak, a swarm of them could suck out enough energy to make several die.

Cedrick’s heart was thumping deeply within his chest like a large, heavy stone. He scrambled over to a tree nearby, away from the slope, for protection. Unhooking his pouch of magic salt from his belt, he whispered his individual magic code word that had been bestowed upon him by the Sorceror’s Guild, in the language of the ancient natives of Astricka.

“Sartellicka symporion,” he whispered, rubbing the magical salt into his hands. He could feel it sinking in, stimulating the magical nerves within him. Within moments, a pure energy was rushing over his entire body, a pale blue aura around him that was shining brightly around him like a mist, causing his skin to be tinged with a pale blue glow, which meant he had gained an abundant amount power from the Great Divine.

The Exons could attack in the blink of an eye, so he had to think on his feet. He knew that they’d try to find him based on his warmth, so he conjured up a fireball, and wove it into an orb, where it would be embedded enough to seem human. As a Sorceror, Cedrick wasn’t the quickest or the best with ideas, but when it came to defending himself, he could fight well enough. Sending the orb rolling down the slope, he watched the Exon’s emerald green eyes.

But the orb wasn’t enough, and to Cedrick’s dismay, the worst had occurred.

He’d been spotted.

The Exons, when together, worked as a single unit, and every last one of their emerald eyes had rested on him. Before a single second had passed, they were swarming directly toward him as he rolled down the slope. A small bunch  them zapped straight to the tree, two of them falling into the portal. The rest were zooming all over the place, nearly missing Cedrick several times. Cedrick felt a bite on his right shoulder, and he whipped out his sword, fighting off the rest of them as quickly as he could. The portal was high up by the great blue leafed tree, so he continued slashing the Exons and watching their blue inner blood splatter like into the air, and then decided to climb. He used his magic to imagine his entire body as cold as ice, which made him feel nearly frozen as a result, but he kept moving. The remaining Exons, uninterested in his coldness, zapped over to guard the portal, and that’s when Cedrick knew that this couldn’t be purely coincidence. There was a scheme involved.

He had reached a knot in the large tree that allowed him to stand close to the portal, and he placed his sword in its hilt, but prepared to draw it, hoping that he could slash the remaining Exons as he leapt through the air, his eyes locked on them as targets. Their eyes were cold and blank on him, and they seemed bitterly disinterested in the taste of his vital energy, but he knew that the amount of magic dust he had used would wear off in a couple of hours. With a deep breath, Cedrick kept his eyes locked on the last few targets. He sprung forward from the tree, and allowed himself to fly with the last of his magic salt, and a group of Exons straight across, causing them to die and fall to the floor with a thud.

Cedrick landed on thin grass on the other side of the portal, right in front of a pathway that led straight up to a large building with smoke leaving the chimney. He got up, dusted himself off, and began to walk forward suspiciously. He couldn’t think of anything else the man could have wanted with these creatures besides to make them his slaves. After all, they were right by the sea of Cressantris, the magical waters that surrounded the entire world of Astricka. Not only that, but only good souls, who had been proven worthy by the gods, could be allowed to extract the salt from the water, and Cedrick did it for a living. He knew this would be dangerous, but he took it upon himself to investigate.

His family lived in the region of Archellon now that he was a salt collector for the Sorceror’s Guild, so it was rational for him to be concerned that if he didn’t do something to stop this dark one, then Orna, his wife, along with his baby, Serafina, might be in danger as well as the nymphs and humatriacs that lived on Archellon’s coastline.

Cedrick peered in through one of the building’s windows to see the seaside creatures not even working, but being contained inside large tanks an an unconscious state, with wires attatched to their heads and trailing off into a great orb in the center of the room. This wasn’t even a question of slavery. It was worse. The dark one was obviously stealing the souls of the creatures so he could take magic for himself.

There was a log cabin in the distance, made of dark wood, and atop a hill. He assumed this was where the dictator could be found. He also knew that it was time for him to stand up for his people, and to stand him for himself.

*** stopped abrubtly for now. will continue. this is merely the opening...

Spoiler...

There shall be a prophecy that shall be revealed after the face off with the dark one, named Rodsha... the propehcy will reveal that Serafina is the chosen one, but she is in so much danger because of Rodsha that they must send her to Earth.

More is coming up soon.