ConverseFireGirl

This was amazing. As this is a prologue, I am very interested as to seeing how you continue it from here, and start the chapters which are to follow. First ...

Oh my goodness, this piece was amazing! The last few lines were so good and well written and I can't even... What. :P What it a ghost of her mother? ...

Wow, this was a very powerful piece that I couldn't stop reading! Onto the writing! I don't have any things to suggest that dragonfphoenix hasn't already, but I'd also suggest ...

Hey there! Converse here for a review! :D Overall, brilliant writing and ideas, but I'd just suggest a few little things to improve on: "to help me sleep, but you ...

Okay, let me just say, I can relate. And it sucks, right? Onto the writing! Maybe just clean up those few little punctuation issues, like turning the: " . . ...

Hey there! First of all, I think that you could put the: "Rough story idea came to me. And got out of bed to put this down so far. :)" ...

This was good piece of writing that I was interested in and I really was curious as to how you'd end it, and I think that you've ended it pretty ...

This has got a lot of potential, I can tell, but you can easily improve it with some good reviews, which I hope this will be! Right, so firstly, you ...

Wow, this was a powerful piece. A very powerful piece indeed. The last line is so well written and makes it seem more REAL, and makes the reader almost sympathize ...

This is a very nice piece of writing yet again, Laure :P The way that you cross out the "Rockets" bit is VERY well done and puts more of a ...

Wow, this was an amazing piece of writing, seriously. When I was reading this, I was so captivated as to what was going to happen next and you ended it ...

Oh my LORD. This is amazing, really. Like, written wise. :P The story is VERY captivating and when he admitted that he liked the look on his mum's face, it ...

Hey there! Good work! Right, so I'd suggest that you perhaps change: "A candle glows dim in the dark." To maybe: "The candle glows dim in the dark." As by ...

This was a very interesting piece of work. I found that you wrote it very well in the last lines, (as well as the rest) where the narrator says that ...

This was a very powerful poem, indeed, and I thought it was very well written. There's one little improvement I'd suggest: "It flowed, and flowed, and flowed. A mass pile ...