z

Young Writers Society


E - Everyone

Insane Waltz

by cupcakenx


My headphones are on

again.

I think the music m ight be getting to my h

ead. Seriously, t hese headphones feel like they’re glued to me when my mu sic is on, and I used to not be able ttto take them off outside of class. But when class did come

around and that chaotic bell ranggs, they always slisd off like they’re supposed to. I do

n’t get it. I really don’t.

And I physically can’t take them off. You might just think it’s a mental thing, like I simply don’t want to take them off, but

really, when I try to slide them off to just…take a break fro

m the music, almost, they just don’t come off. They stay there, like they’ve become one with me or somet hing.

I am the headpho,. nes. The headphones are me.

Something weird li .;’

ke that.

And then I w as sitting at home, listening to my music that I’ve grown tired of and feeling the almost sticky leather. I tried tojdf turn it down, but there was a proble with my mp3 where it stayed locked at one volume after I d

ropped it in the toilet once. I just wanted to go to slee

p. But I couldn’t, with the bass ringing in my eardrums.

My mom had finally bou ght me sleeping pills a week before this, with extreme reluctance. She didn’t believe that I physical

y couldn’t take off my headphones, but she got me them anyway after I showed her that I really couldn’t.

But tonight, the sleeping pills just weren’t working. My eyelids whh

ere heavy and I was wrecked with extreme fatigue, but something inside me just refused to finally shut down. My brain, maybe.

After a few more minutes of me staring up at my blank and boring ceiling, I finally got up.

But as soon as my feet touched the ground, I spun around in a circle.

What?hh

My feet

started moving around on their own, my body swaying and dancing around my room gracefully. I didn’t know how to dance but apparently something in me d id.

I twirled and gallo

ped in the halls, and I wondered how my parents couldn’t hear my loud footsteps. I finally leaped out of the door, skiddi

ng and dancing on the sidewalk while my feet turned brown with collected dirt.

I didn’t know w’

‘hat was going on. But now I do.

A girl in the 21st century n

affected with the Danci g Plague of 1518.

I8 haven’t stopped dancing since

. That’s why my texr is so breaky and wrongf I’m danicing mywhile trying to get my last words down. My arms are tired, and my legs feel like they’re going to just fall off.

I’m probably

going to collapse s


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User avatar
7 Reviews


Points: 571
Reviews: 7

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Thu Jan 30, 2014 1:24 pm
Othersider says...



When i was reading this at the start i was like 'what????' then when i got to ending, all the pieces fit together. the fact that i was wearing my headphones when i was reading only made the ending more awesome. This is really a good story, good plot.
Keep Writing...




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27 Reviews


Points: 242
Reviews: 27

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Thu Jan 23, 2014 12:04 pm
Bol wrote a review...



Wow, just wow. At first i was like 'meh' and quite disappointed at the state of writing, the mass of typos and such. But I decided to read on, and that feeling was replaced with curiosity, then straight up applause.
The type of vocabulary that should be used in a story will vary depending on the air and atmosphere, but the simple English worked very well for this one, and especially the myriad of typos. I wondered at first if a second grader was writing this, no offense, but when I read the last few lines I realised how brilliant you were in writing this, and audacious to say the least.




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205 Reviews


Points: 240
Reviews: 205

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Wed Jan 15, 2014 1:09 pm
AEChronicle wrote a review...



I have to agree with haylesbales, bloody brilliant! I don't know if all of the typos were deliberate, but whether or not they are, it fits perfectly with the idea of the story. I always struggle with short story writing, but this is great.

Childish and fun, yet with adult enough concepts, it makes you read it, literally, because you're so confused at first. I must say that I like it.

Thank you cupcakenx!




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42 Reviews


Points: 269
Reviews: 42

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Sun Jan 12, 2014 12:17 am
horrendous wrote a review...



this story made me feel pretty good. i wasn't sure where you were going with it til "dancing plague". that concept and the preceding story just made me grin. i don't think the payoff would have been so great if you hadn't had the text be so disjointed.

it's surprising that such a small amount of text has such impact. great job on this.




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Points: 464
Reviews: 6

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Sat Jan 11, 2014 11:53 am
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haylesbales wrote a review...



Haha! Bloody brilliant! Something orginal and quirky. Your piece has real substance without being over emotive or cliche. Your words straddle the line of simple and alluding to meaning. I like how the text is imperfect, unpredictable and jolty as you've really embodied the context and provided interesting reading material that follows a certain path. Bery high praise on writing somethinh other than a poem/love story/ adventure chapter that has become so commonplace, there are real moments of genius here!




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183 Reviews


Points: 1810
Reviews: 183

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Sat Jan 11, 2014 11:14 am
ConverseFireGirl wrote a review...



Wow, this was an amazing piece of writing, seriously.
When I was reading this, I was so captivated as to what was going to happen next and you ended it PERFECTLY. Seriously.
I especially like the way you break the lines too, making the text hard to read and concentrate on, just like the narrator.
The punctuation adds something too, just distorting the text more, which is great!
I cannot fault you on this in anyway at all, and you totally deserve to be on the Spotlight with this. Great work! I'd follow you, but I am already! xD
-CFG




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621 Reviews


Points: 4984
Reviews: 621

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Sat Jan 11, 2014 1:40 am
Rook says...



This was a really interesting story!





A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.
— Unknown