BenFranks

Hey there! My favourite thing about this poem is the choice of language; that's what really crafts the originality to this. From this the effect is much more powerful and ...

Hey there! ~ I'm dreaming of a white christmas... Anyway! I like the "I'm dreaming... Where... Where... And..." Pattern it's individual and kind of catchy :) Here's just a few ...

Hey! Thumbs up for the structuring of this poem. There's some real originality here. I'd improve this by revising the fluency and perhaps sprucing up the language in some parts. ...

Hey there Rose! Punctuation Okay, the prior thing I notice when I read this is that there's only really full stops, so I think there's a small lack of rhythm ...

Hullo! We don't really need an introduction, I've reviewed your lovely poetry before! :D Anyway. Punctuation This is well thought out and I don't have any problem with your fluency ...

Haha, I like the short and snappy rhythm you've got to this its one of those reads that you smile at! XD Anyway, hello and welcome to YWS! I'm Ben, ...

Okay I think your biggest problem is the page layout. Put it in set columns so you're not hugging the images. The font's too big and the spacing inbetween isn't ...

Hey there! My favourite thing about your poetry here Ed is the comparison of emotion to colour such as these lines: Red; with passion, anger and joy; It makes the ...

I'd try and be more surreal, that's my only point really. If you're going to be imaginative and out of the box when you write, give it everything and don't ...

Hey. Can't really critique a stunning piece of originality such as this. I mean you haven't gone wrong anywhere. There's constant fluency and punches of imagery and its individual. It's ...

Hey and welcome to YWS! -- Note: Run spell check before posting -- Okay, have a quick revision of grammar and typos so we can read your quotes easier. Also ...

Hey there! Repetitions - Line length - Tone I feel this would've worked for the first 2 or 3 lines but it gets too much after that and it's a ...

I disagree with Galerius almost everywhere! Especially with recreating a character from Schindler's List I'd insist on keeping the originality of this work, as opposed to intertwining the ideas with ...

I think you can discuss a subject like this all you want, but you're only going to provoke a response that makes your argument look "flawed". There are huge amounts ...

Hey there! Okay, I enjoyed the colour of vocab you've got here! It really delivers some effect. The main nitpick I have with it is in terms of fluency. I ...