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I really liked this. It had a cool ending, I could kind of guess it was going to happen though. Anyways, you might want to explain a teeny bit, why ...

This was really cool. The slang that Luke used put me off a bit, but mostly because I'm not really good at reading slang haha. Anyway, I'm no good at ...

Okay, well I couldn't really find much at fault with the story, it was a little confusing, but that's alright. As long as you sort of smooth out any introductions ...

I feel like critiquing both of your stories, the unrevised and the revised. :) Sorry if anything is particularly harsh. I took my last breath, the last gulp of air. ...

Hi, sorry that this might be a pointless review but I came across this chapter just now(I'll read the rest soon), and I wanted to ask about something. So, everything ...

Is this the end? Were we the cause of our demise? Are the answers just more questions? No. This is the end. We were the cause. We let them in. ...

Hi, this was good, but I don't really get who 'he' is, and the whole 'sacrifice' thing. The dialogue get's a bit mixed up in the middle, for me at ...

That was really good, and yeah, like it was mentioned, dream scenes are usually very cliche. But you managed to pull it off, haha. It was a bit too realistic, ...

I really, really liked this. It's short but awesome :) "We're all mad here," says the cat, As he fades to nothing but a grin. Further down, We're falling fast ...

That's really cool. It pissed me off that she ended up getting caught, but I guess that's just the way of the story lol. Anyways, is this the first chapter? ...

I like it :) It's cool. Just because it doesn't make sense doesn't mean it's not any good, because it is. And it does make sense :D Haha to me ...

That was a really interesting prologue, I can't wait to actually read the first chapter! The only thing I could pick out there was in the first few sentences. Did ...

I really like this! Perhaps you could of extended a bit further, like, where was she? How old was she? Why was she there? Why was it happening, all that ...

If writing could look stunning, it'd look like this, for sure. I absolutely loved this, the swearing definitely gave it an edge, which I extra liked. It was great imagery, ...

Okay, so I didn't really see any mistakes with this, some of the lines were a bit sketchy, but all in all, I loved this poem! It's one of the ...