Amira15

yeah it was a bit short! do more! i liked it!

Its really interesting. Having your best friend hurt you badly as I can read. Good emotion, Nothing but nod's of excellence from me.

I felt you wanted it to be sorrowful. Although some stanzas were some felt more happy to me, and some empty. I suggest more adjectives describing how you're feeling.

Yeah The structure messes up the flow completely.The beginning doesn't sound as dark as its trying to be. If you fix the structure and throw in some new adjectives, you ...

Well everyones said it already so I wont burden you and repeat it. First off welcome to YWS! Well the beginning was very intriguing. I can see your talented at ...

I can see every ones already corrected your besides that o LOVE it. You really used nice adjectives.

This is a truly romantic Poem. I just love the metaphors and the words you chose. There so simple but, the way you put them in place....... BRAVO BRAVO!!! I ...

Okay for all you people new to literature, You should know poetry doesn't have to has other forms this one happens to be an ode.Look it up, Google it if ...

some grammar mistakes but other then that i loved it and i must say i m a Naruto fan myself.and i will have my Naruto stories up Hear so watch ...

this is so creative,its like a revaltion to something so simple.Its a lesson in logic.[b]

i like the flow ,Very well chosen words

Its a nice poem, many people have to go through it so you can connect. Keep writing!!

Thanks for the advice! :) No chatspeak.

OMg Love it when you close your eyes and dream you see the future,you can shape it and hold it in your head until your actually there.

OMg Love it you can close your eyes and dream you see the future,you can shape it and hold it in your head until your actually there.