Abigail_W.

Hiya, and welcome to the Young Writers Society! The content of this poem is excellent, so I will just go through and edit some things in red ... Your eyes, ...

This is a very pretty poem, as I have noticed all of your poems are! I think I'm just going to pick at this a little bit, so bear with ...

If things were "going to fast," they would be preparing not to eat for a prolonged period of time. Upon seeing the title of the poem, I'm sure some people ...

Ah, where did the piece go? Maybe a mysterious zombie is stealing all of the YWS posts! Oh no! Welcome to YWS, Milo, and I'll be happy to review this ...

This poem is very dark and mysterious, which I like very much. I have one general problem with it, though. It wasn't the lack or articles; it was the conjugation ...

I admire the way you take such a simple idea of digging up a Hibiscus (or 'an Hibiscus' -- whichever you dialect chooses) and make it into a carefully detailed, ...

Since the poem itself is very nice, I am just going to correct the technical things. The things I fixed are in red. :) I am Undone. A puzzle missing ...

I look forward to the door. It is sealed secure, but since this is an elated story I will unlock it. I have always been taught not to refer to ...

Ooh, this is a fun poem! the ocean is commotion, a toxic potion. Ocean/commontion/potion. I love it! mermaids sing of many cute things like mittens, and kittens, and crepes, and ...

Hi Litehawk! I think the vote is unanimous that a different title is beneficial for the success of the poem. However, the content itself is wonderful! Pen and paper, camera ...

Hiya Lindabelle, and welcome to YWS! don't choose to let the music fade the expression of feelings the fabric of relationships the best of sayings are said for a reason ...

Nice poem, and very true! The rhyme scheme is wonderful. One by one, slowly slinking by on their route of creed, each unknowingly gripped by greed. "Unknowingly gripped by greed" ...

Nice jb, SimonCowellLuver! It was the one day That all my memories faded away I agree with Spy0h the use of the word "one" in the first line. There is ...

Sceamandshout, you have finally spoken! It is a wonderful message, and I do agree, we all just need to say what's on our minds every once in a while. I've ...

Howdy Persephoneia! Everything about this poem -- the helter skelter rhyme scheme, the random line breaks -- yells, "Anguish! Anguish! Anguish!" Great job, and excellent choice of title! How can ...