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Young Writers Society



Wonders

by wonderingkate


I wonder why God gave me such a blessing

I wonder why God thought I deserved it

I wonder if I can ever repay Him.

I know I take my blessings for granted

More often than I would like to admit

But, don’t we all?

A part of growing up is realizing we have many advantages

For me, my Mom taught me to grow.

Now I know what a blessing my Mom is

Now I know, she will continue to be a blessing till I die

Now I know that I can repay him, by attempting to be a blessing just like my Mom

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21 Reviews

Points: 2243
Reviews: 21

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Wed Dec 02, 2009 11:46 am
Woozey the Writer wrote a review...



hi.
I am now going to try and write you a review, but, don't worry, it's only due to the ratios.
Your poem was...interesting!
It was good, no doubt, but it was slightly...random!

Maybe try and base it on one point not several ones all jumbled together!

Thanks for the read,
Woozey.




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Points: 1802
Reviews: 5

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Sat Nov 28, 2009 6:37 am
NonFictionIdot says...



This is a great poem! I love how your
mother is your blessing and how you have
Learned to appreciate it.
Amazingly written!




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661 Reviews

Points: 15961
Reviews: 661

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Thu Nov 26, 2009 8:38 pm
Jasmine Hart wrote a review...



Hi,

Welcome to YWS! I hope you're enjoying it. :)

Personally I think that the philosophical nature of this makes it read more like a journal entry than a poem-which isn't to say that poems can't be philosophical, but I think that it might benefit from some imagery and maybe dialogue which could make it more vivid and more like an experience and less like pure thought. I'd try describing the mother and what she has done to inspire such thankfulness and gratitude and love in the reader, and maybe describe her little quirks and habits so that it's more personal to the speaker.

Hope this helps.

Jas





If you don't know it's impossible it's easier to do. And because nobody's done it before, they haven't made up rules to stop anyone doing that again, yet.
— Neil Gaiman