When I Say "Flawless"

Hi!
Might I suggest taking the dashes out of the stanzas? It looks more professional and people can already tell there's a break there.

"Those fingers, still rough, soften with my touch;

Your skin glows like a moon in a starless night;"

I don't know if you need a semi-colon on either of these two lines. They just seem unneeded. If there's a reason please let me know.

Also don't forget to have periods at the end of each stanza if you're going to go that route. Your poem needs to be grammatically sound all the way through.

And once more, the semi-colons seem a bit unneeded. A period would do just as well.

Overall, great job! The only problem here is simple grammatical errors. I hope you continue to try poetry and not sell yourself short!

Hey! Retro here for a review

I know you say you want criticism but i'm not one for destroying a poem completely, that being said I will do some nitpicks then talk about what I liked, okay?

'The cracks in your heart from all those 'goodbye's'.'

I'm pretty sure you don't need the apostrophe in goodbyes

' Your long, bony fingers, jagged as a blade's edge

Your skin, so pale it scares a ghost '

I think you need a period about edge and also i'm not a massive fan of the imagery in the next line. I get what you're going for, and perhaps trying to break away from a similie here, but I don't quite think you've hit the nail on the head here so i'd give it another look

'Your skin glows, a moon in a starless night;'

I would put a like instead of a comma. However, that might just be a writer's preference so it isn't major in the slightest

Right, onto what I liked. Well it made me smile that is one thing. You've got a cute little thing here. I like the ideas you've got going on here, and you have some really cute imagery. I like endings so i'll briefly talk about yours

'One day I'll guide your lost thoughts to me. I'll be the light. '

For me, a ending of a poem needs to be defining crux. A summary which leaves the reader satisfied like after having a good meal. And I think yours is quite good at this. The cesarua in the sentence makes the last message hit home well. It summarises your idea of becoming the person for someone to love.

Overall, I think you have a good cute little poem, and I think you're quite capable of writing poetry so don't doubt yourself

Keep it up!
Here if you ever need anything,
~Retro