Fandoms

Thank you so much for explaining us fangirls\fanboys so aptly!
I mean, the number of times I have to explain the reason behind my apparent 'unnecessary' love for 'a bunch of fictional characters' is just sickening.

Anyhoo, I absolutely loved this poem!
It was so smart and to the point, I enjoyed reading it.

''Some will mutter under breaths,
Words from ancient tongues or worlds unknown,
"Did I hear 'muggle' or 'mundane'?
And did someone mentioned cake?"

"Pansycake!" they'll shout at you,
Holding dauntless guns, jumping roof to roof,
Run away, I would advise you,
But we both know that it's too late.''

These 2 paragraphs were my favourite!
Especially, 'mundane' and 'muggle' and 'pansycake' !

Keep writing!

Since I'm part of multiple fandoms, out of which you've named almost every one, this truly spoke to me. It's of course hard to explain fandoms, other than telling people of all the inside jokes that they won't get because they aren't in the fandom. But, thankfully, there are people of your kind who have effed up sleeping schedules or live in another country who relate to your feelings, that make you feel alive and happy, I'm glad you mentioned that by the end.

I'm guessing you're on Tumblr, as am I (look me up?).

I enjoyed the fact that this wasn't such a traditional poem, and that I could almost hear it being sung in my head like a psalm to marching band music.

Good grammar, nice diversity of examples, all in all A+ in my books (har har)

Keep up the good work,

Thegirlwhowrites, we meet again. *giggles* I think I'll get on with my little nitpicks.

First...

NEVER WRITE ABOUT FANDOMS AGAIN IF YOU DO NOT INCLUDE PERCY JACKSON.

I can't trust anyone who is a tribute. They kill, and Percy Jackson kills, but at least Percy does it for good. Tributes have no reason, except the reaping done by Lady Gaga which doesn't really count as a reason at all.

Second...

"Mentioned" is "mention".

"And did someone mentioned cake?"

That's all I have. Keep writing (no fandoms), and keep reviewing!

-wisegirl22

Hello EPICnumber1 here for a review...

This is a great poem, the best I've read in weeks. I love the topic fandoms because there is loads to write about. When I saw this poem had an end I almost cried because I really wanted it to carry on.

Some words don't rhyme yet some did and if they should rhyme they all should or none at all.

I could tell what all of the books were in here and I am a big fan of them all. There were parts I didn't understand though such as...

"What regret you would feel soon after" I think there should be a coma in there some where

I really don't want to point every little thing I liked and every single mistake but if you read through this you will find them on your own

keep writing

-EPICnumber1

Hey, Weather here to review your work.
The main impression I had from your title was that of course your poem would be centered around "Fandoms" which have become quite a more popular craze especially among teenagers in these past years. Your poem itself explored the humorous negativity fandoms bring and I liked how you portrayed fandoms as a whole other universe of people and that it may be something people in reality, could not be fully aware of.

I do have some nitpicks for your poem though. At certain points in your poem, it didn't necessarily read as a poem it read almost as an explanation in an essay of some sort. Possibly due to the lack of poetic devices and flow, but those can be easily worked on or adjusted. There was also a few random end rhymes.

"And you could have never known"

The word "And" interrupted the flow of the line, it could be fine without it.


"What was to greet you in the answer,

What regret you would feel soon after."

This almost worked, but there was something in the phrasing that brought an uncertain awkwardness to it. Perhaps it's the capitalization of "What" in the second line, which is still essentially a part of the first line here.

"And did someone mentioned cake?"

Grammatical error here, it should be *mention* as oppose to "mentioned" since the word *did* in this line implies the present tense. However, this line would work with the word mentioned if you removed the word "did" but again that would change the dynamic, so it's up to you.

"Run away, I would advise you,"

In this line I would have just changed the ordering of them - *I would advise you to run away* - It makes more sense even in speech context.

"Where to start? Where to start?"

This is fine but as you have two continued repetitive questions so close together it appears slightly odd, maybe if it were written one below another, e.g.
Where to start?
Where to start?


"Now there's really no other way to end this than by saying
After all this you may think that we’re strange, that we're not like the rest
But you don't understand that fandoms are your shire when your home doesn't welcome you,
Characters are your friends when you feel like you have none,
They're your laughter and joy when your life might be dull

They teach you of love, of loss and of sadness, when you'll find it in life later on."

This whole ending needed to be broken up more in the poem because at the moment it appears and reads like a conclusion paragraph at the end of an essay.

I thought it was quite humorously written, just look over it a bit more and see where you want to go with it. Hopefully this review helped you. Well done and write on!


~WeatherMan