Haiku

I have slowly grown to very much enjoy haikus - mainly because they are short and I find them easy to review, hahha.

I found it very spectacular that you were able to have such a powerful subject matter portrayed in such a small amount of words.

Eats away at dried cement,

I love haikus, but I've never tried to review one before... Let's see how this goes.
Your rhythm is perfect for a haiku. I'm glad you know what you're talking about when you call something a haiku. A lot of people don't.
Your word choice gives the reader quite a visual with so few words at your disposal. I especially like the word "dried" because it makes me think of summer and vibrant green grass. The last line is perhaps my favorite line because it brings the entire poem together and gives it a point. The cycle of life. and how even when humans cover up nature like a blemish, nature kicks them in the face and says, "Nuh-uh! I'm growing here and there's nothing you can do to stop me!" I definitely got that from your use of "defiant." great word choice again.
This was a really great haiku, and I can say nothing to improve it.
Great work!
Keep writing!
-Fortis Fortitude

Hey there, reowine, June here,

I am a huge appreciator of haiku verse, and this one made me smile. It's quite hard to critique haiku unless it blatantly disregards the rules of the verse. This one feels particularly victorious, and your kiriji is excellent; I love the break from destructive (eating away at cement) to create triumph (home).

Haiku may be a simple enough practice, but it is difficult to do well. Two thumbs up.

June

I don't usually review poetry but I saw this and was lie "Ooh, a haiku!"

Anyways, this was nice. I like the imagery of the "defiant grass"

The only line that did not work for me was the last one, it seemed a bit off, like it didn't fit with the rest of the poem somehow. Maybe try something along the lines of "making space again" or something?

Other than that I really liked it. You should consider expanding it by a few lines, it would be interesting to see how this would turn out.

Very strong haiku . I enjoyed reading it, but I wish there was more to it though.

The defiant grass,
Eats away at dried cement,
Making home again.

Personal I like it


Please keep writing and work to add more every time you write.









~MindBlown