I was born
of a mother with no spine
and a father with no heart.
My mother had a kind smile
and a sweet demeanor, but
she was a blob of flesh and blood
which as I grew older, became a sight
that was hard to digest.
Her skin spread out across the floor and
her face was crudely drawn on its surface;
a shadow of what it once was before her capture,
but you could still see the remnants of what was once
a face akin to Helen of Troy.
A face that could have launched a thousand ships.
She was so weak and could barely move,
which was probably why she could never escape.
She hated looking at herself as she knew the truth
And hated that I knew too.
Her whole life's purpose was to be stepped on
by the man who loved her so
A reason that made my nose scrunch in disgust
and my eyes tear up from hatred.
I hated her because she was willing to live a lie.
A lie that had come undone long ago;
its threads frayed and thin from constant reweaving
and overtightened stitches that were destined to come undone.
A lie that to call it a life would make you laugh
because you would think it a jest that anyone would view
this doomed tapestry as something to live by.
My father never cared to watch this spectacle
as he knew that the truth it revealed was damning and
he would rather live a frayed lie than painstakingly weave a tapestry
from the sturdy yarns of truth; a clear mirror that would
reflect back to him the monster that he had become.
Unlike my mother, my father stood tall on two feet.
His brain was large and his body was made entirely of stone.
His chin was always held high; so high that it almost hid
his eyes, which over the years had clouded due
to his unsurmountable anger.
This anger had also gnawed at his heart
and when there was no more heart to feed on
it fed on his soul. Now, he is more stone
than man and is just as cruel.
With just one step he would make my heart tremble.
With just one word he would make my body go numb.
With just one look he would make my mind go blank.
It is no wonder that I have remained trapped for so long
as my very soul wanted to jump out my throat
whenever it sensed his presence.
In fact, just last summer, my father killed me.
And ever since then, I have had to learn how to live anew,
but my heart is now submerged in the deep sea of hatred
and the ships of revenge rest at its docks;
Ready for battle.
The hatred that I hold for my father is different from
the one I hold for my mother.
The hatred I have towards my mother is akin to moss.
It has spread everywhere, but has no deep root.
It is difficult to hate someone deeply with a kind heart.
The hatred I have towards my father is akin to a fungus.
Its roots cling to the earth around it and they travel wide and deep.
I will always hate my father
seven times more than I hate my mother.
I was born
of a mother with no spine
and a father with no heart.
Is my future doomed or will I realize the great destiny that was bestowed upon me since rebirth?
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125,029 Literary Works • 672,781 Reviews
Hey, redhood! I'm Alex and today I'll be reviewing this moving poetry by you.
To begin things, let's discuss the title. At first glance, it appears the description of some fictional magical creatures. But after reading this poem, I could understand the deep meaning they hold. The reader doesn't realise it's true interpretation until after he's finished with the poetry, something I find deeply beautiful. The stone man points towards your heartless father while the woman blob is an indicative of the lack of spine (metaphor for courage)in your mother. It perfectly represents dysfunctional families and their complexities. Each parent is hated, despite their contrasting roles and characters. The resentment built as a result of it all is also well depicted.
Let's talk about each family member. First comes the mother- the blob woman.
I am amazed by the choice of words here. There's bold and brutally honest, saying the toxic marriage is a cage to her. Her face isn't as pretty as it once once used to, as it is has suffered the hit of being in captivating all these years. It lays a transition for the worse, being a shadow of your former self.
These lines delve in the practicality of the matter, stating a logical reasoning to why she is not able to escape. Years of hard labour has weakened her to the point of not being able to move. The situation sounds similiar to a caged tiger animal who loses its glory overtime lacking the required exercise it needs.
I found this part to be particularly appealing, as a reader. The mother isn't oblivious to her truth, but chooses to look the other way. She's grown to hate herself for choosing this life and sticking with the decision. The subtle mockery of the narrator's father for stepping on her as a way of his love is wonderfully executed.
My favourite lines right here. The metaphor for moss was so unique in thought! While it may be abundant, it is not set by hard-standing grounds and thus weak and shallow at best. The dilemma of not being able to truly hate her due to her kindness gives a nice sympathizing touch to her character.
Let's discuss the father- the stone man, now.
Herein, his guilt is declared. Whatever the family suffers through, is inflicted by the narrator's father. He is described as a big man with a cold heart and vain pride.
I found this part to be particularly vivid, painting the father to be a villain. Someone who's lost both his heart and soul to his fuming anger and cruelty.
The effect the father has on the narrator is striking. It shows how deep seated his fear in the family is. While the mother has been oppressed for years and thus not a reliable indicator of his present state, these symptoms that the narrator experiences in his father's presence are a living testimony to his terrifying image as a person.
Fungi are known for their vast spreading roots, in fact that's the reason why even higher plants establish symbiotic relationships with them to absorb nutrients and water with greater efficiency. The way you use this metaphor here is astonishing.
Coming finally, to the narrator and his struggles. While we do not read much about him as he focuses on the other members of his family on the frontline of this abuse, we do get a glimpse of his resolve.
We are introduced to the war brewing in the narrator's mind. He's determined to fight for his sake to make things even, refusing to tolerate his father's tyranny in silence like his mother. He's ready to spill his own blood for revenge. We see an anger stem from this hatred, imitating that of his father in a slightly ugly light.
Overall, this was quite a spine-chilling poetry to read. Broken families are a result of hurt people hurting people. Most of the times, women are reluctant to leave their toxic marriages forthe stability their children. But here we see how the characters of father negatively impacts the narrator, making his life worse. Kids are never an excuse, in fact you leave a wrong man to rescue your kids from harm. But here, the mother is too exhausted to save herself and her child and they're both stuck in an endless maze of victimhood and pain. Truly remarkable poem, hope to read more from you in the future.
I really appreciate the thorough review, Alex! I really like how you caught onto the semblance between the father and their child towards the end. I wanted to pose the question of whether or not the child will truly be able to break the cycle. I also really appreciated your thoughts at the end because they're all too true. It's unfortunate that women are taught that there is no way out from a bad marriage because they have children, their reputation, etc. when like you said, being around the wrong man can cause further damage. Thank you again for the review, Alex! I can't wait to write more!
Now that you mention it, it makes so much more that you were trying to portray the cycle of generational trauma I just thought it was some unintentional mirroring but this concept is much cooler!
Hey Redhood! I loved your work, it felt really personal to me.First of all, I really like how the narrator describes the mother at first. It depicts a lot of women in marriages, and how they look to their kids. The narrator also describes the father's ignorace to the mother's suffering.
For me I think this shows how hollow the father's personality is/looks to their children. The negligence to their own mind, their spouse and kids, etc.The sentence I really felt was this one
I love every picturization here, mostly this one
I really liked this sentence. I feel like this representation has both simile-like and physical meaning. Maybe a scared soul?- (please feel free to correct if I'm wrong ^^). For the paining sensation when trying to hold oneself's emotion, mostly before crying.
I think there might be one grammatical mistake.
It will be
Everything's great about this poem. It's relatable for some, but still beautiful how you managed to capture and depict the feelings. I hope I get too see your work in future ^^
Thank you so much, BrownMatter! I'm really glad that you liked this poem. I'm really proud of it!