Young Writers Society

Hey! This was amazing!

I loved how you managed to be vague and still very direct. (That's not quite the wording I'm looking for but...) Everything was described wonderfully. So, I'm personally not the best with tenses but you're writing in past tense and once or twice you changed to present tense.

She had problems.
Everyone does, really.
.
She had friends.
Not everyone had those.

On the first part you used "Does" Instead of "Did"
Now, this is fine. And you could keep this but you would have to be consistent so in the second part you would need to say "Has" instead of "had".
Maybe get a second opinion on this because tenses used to be my weak spot and I'm still working on them a bit.

Anyways, loved the poem.

Hey, this is a pretty cool poem. You described the girl really well, and I can relate super well. I do have a few suggestions for you, though.

First of all, the title is pretty drab. It doesn't have much zing to it, not much that's super inviting to a potential reader. So maybe think of something that would describe the person or the poem better?

Second, the first stanza doesn't particularly stand out. "Once upon a time" is a little of a dry opener, and I think that the lines "There was a kid/about the age of a middle schooler" could be condensed and improved. "There was" (in any kind of writing) is usually a boring way to begin a sentence. "About the age of" is kind of clunky-sounding to me, if you know what I mean, and I think rewording that might be a good idea.

And competitive
All mixed in one

Almost all her sides shown out to all

Hey! ... I REALLY LIKED YOUR POEM!!

Just one thing I'd like to point out.

"Everyone was kind of her friend,

Though only a few chosens hung out with her regularly."

"chosens" isn't actually a word....so i think you could have written "chosen ones" instead of that.

The rest was perfect. xD
I REALLY liked the way you described her... different, unique,artsy,smart,etc.
She's weird, she's a mystery.. she's "undefinable" ... That's just SOOO amazing xD

It's a really good and delightful poem.
Keep up the good work. xD
STAY AMAZING, KEEP WRITING!! xD

Well, this is great. I really liked this. Poems are fun and easy to review, in my opinion. Thank you.

Well, this girl is strange. She is weird, she is wrong, she is different. Who are you actually trying to describe? Well, she was special. So I do not know how to describe her as she was undefinable.

This poem is nice. may you ever describe the name? Whatever. Never mind that. Your poem was good, though.

~~Tay01.