Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language.
The rest of the night was highly uneventful. Charlie was able to sleep without much interruption, safe with Vermillion wrapped around her. Vermillion, however, found herself very much distracted, mind continuing to wander from past to present. It didn't help that it was cold outside, and Charlie had her jacket. Since she couldn't bring herself to take it from her, she simply braced herself against the unyielding weather, settling in for the long night.
It turned out to be a long night indeed; Vermillion didn't sleep until the night sky began to lighten, her eyes never leaving the clearing where the mastiff lay. Her sleep was mostly without dreams, a heavy patch of black which seemed to stretch on forever. Every once and a while, she'd feel a muscle twitch unconsciously, or feel Charlie snuggle closer to her. For a few fleeting hours, she managed to forget about her capture, the island, and the dog.
She did not, however, forget about her captor.
Even in sleep, his taunting words, "you belong to me now," continued to echo within her ears. Her lips twisted into a snarl which was lost to the air. How dare he, how dare anyone, speak to her that way. What right did they have? Vermillion could get worked up even in her sleep.
It was well into the morning when she finally woke, yanked out of sleep by Charlie's stirring beside her. Vermillion's eyes opened slowly, her shoulders shifting as she pushed herself up, gazing sleepily at her partner. Charlie was still heavy with sleep, that much was obvious, and she groaned softly as she stretched. Her back and shoulders cracked loudly as she did, body twisting with the strength of her movements.
"Mmm...hmm...good morning," she yawned, seemingly unaware of the others' exhausted state. Vermillion wasn't going to try to make it very noticeable though; after all, she was supposed to be the tough one out of the two of them. That much hadn't been forgotten.
"Mornin'." The tall girl flopped back down onto her side, leaves fluttering as she did. Charlie's shirt had hiked up over her waist, revealing a few inches of dark, evenly tanned skin. It made her wonder if Charlie was mixed with something; her face and eyes definitely looked Asian to Vermillion, if her old leader Chi had been anything to go by. They could even be related, by the looks of it. While she thought of this, her eyes wandered over to the clearing, expecting to see the dog, but nearly missing what now sat beside it.
Crouching beside the dog was a short, brown-skinned girl, dusky brown hair cascading down around her waist. Her pale green eyes were narrowed with worry as she traced her hands along the dog's massive form, her fingers pressing lightly against its wounds. The dog whimpered pitifully, head turned away from her, but tail thumping slowly against the ground. Completely engrossed in what she was doing, she didn't seem to notice Vermillion at all, who was starting to rise up in a slow, aggressive form. Noticing her movement, Charlie whispered;
"Vermillion? W-who is that?"
"Shh. She ain't seen us yet." She had the stare of a cat on the hunt, eyes narrowed as she studied the girl. She was short, and a bit chubby, but it didn't look like there was a whole lot of muscle on her. Vermillion judged her to be takeable in a fight, and she rose to her full height, starting to cross the clearing to reach her. Charlie watched quietly, slinking back into the shadow of the tree. If this other person was dangerous, she wanted to stay out of sight. Though she worried for her partner's safety, she knew that it'd be no good if both of them were to be taken, should this be some kind of trap.
The girl never looked up at Vermillion until she was right beside her, shadow looming over her. When she did look up to see the sunlight glinting from her metal prosthetic, she squinted against the glare, lifting one hand to her eyes as if to shade out the sun. Voice defensive, Vermillion spoke.
"I'd get away from that dog, 'f I were you."
"He's hurt. I'm not leaving him." The girl turned her back on Vermillion to look at the dog again, which nipped at her short temper. Reaching out with her human hand, she yanked the girl back to face her.
"Yeah, I know. Leave it alone."
"Are you the one who hurt this dog?" Tone accusatory, the girl's eyes narrowed again, not from the sun this time. "If so, I don't think you're going to be necessary in this situation. Shoo shoo."
"Necessary?" Vermillion's voice changed into a growl, and she bristled visibly. Charlie, sensing the danger, started to squeeze out of the tree to get over there before blows could be exchanged. Before she could, Vermillion spoke again. "Don't think I'm gonna be fuckin' necessary? Just who the hell do ya' think you are?!" Her volume rose with every word, but the girl crouched on the ground remained calm, green eyes level with Vermillion's brown ones.
"I'm Lyla Braus, thank you," she said, then added, "and before you say anything else, I don't care who you are. My main worry is this poor dog."
"This poor dog," Vermillion spat, pointing a finger at the animal in question, "was tryna' kill my friend last night!"
"Th-that's true," Charlie interjected, grabbing hold of the other girl's arm. She relaxed slightly at that, as if Charlie's presence calmed her, but it didn't stop her from continuing to glare at the other girl. Her focus now broken, Lyla's eyes turned to Charlie, scanning her over critically. "B-but, Vermillion, th-there was something weird about the dog last night. I th-think that, m-maybe, just maybe, he was b-being controlled by something? L-look at his eyes."
At her prompt, Vermillion turned her gaze to the dog's face. Its eyes, which had been pure black the night before, had changed to a soft, innocent brown. She began to uncoil, hostility fading as she realized the truth in Charlie's words. The dog was being controlled. Was it being controlled by the same people who had taken them captive? It didn't seem like a too far-fetched idea. Snorting, Vermillion stepped back from Lyla, who had gone back to working on the dog.
"Fine, whatever. But I'm warnin' you, 'f that thing chews yer face off, don' come cryin' to me, even if ya did get kidnapped like the rest of us."
"I'll be sure to keep that in mind." Lyla never once looked at Vermillion while she spoke, and the dark-skinned girl gave one final spit in her direction as she stalked off back to the tree, cursing and grumbling as she went.
Charlie stared after her partner only for a second, before smiling over at Lyla. "S-sorry about her, sh-she's in a bad mood. She's a nice girl, though, w-we just had a rough night."
"She said you guys'd been kidnapped, too."
Points:
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Canary word: Present
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I really loved this but I have a few problems with the grammar punctuations and etc. But you also did very good but I think you should probably fix a few things and btw happy review do to everyone thank you very much for spending your time to read this review but those were the only criticisms i had thank you for your time. Second this is a really long story or book and i really enjoyed reading it thank you for your time and a merry review day too you.
Hey,
This is amusing I admit I enjoyed reading this. It was interesting and captivating with a interesting and well portrayed plot. However I have a few nitpicks, so here they are:
Takeable should really be two words.
{quote]"She said you guys'd been kidnapped, too."[/quote]
There's nothing wrong with this in away. I understand most of the typos through I feel like this one was just really unnecessary.
Aside from that this is a great story!
Sincerely,
Collideascope
Thank you for the review! That actually isn't a typo, it's a conjunction to mimic the way Lyla is pronouncing her words.
I have read the rest of the story now, and it was awesome! I can't wait for more, seriously! This story is like if Warriors and Lost made a baby. (That's a compliment.)
Thank you so much!
Hey it's Noaven! I promised a review and I love where this story is going so it definitely deserves one.
The idea is cool and the personalities are well executed! I know this is still in the early stages and I can feel that there is so much more to come. It's also amusing that it happens to be set on the coast of South Carolina because I actually happen to live in SC right now, not that I know much about the state. Charlie is very cute too! Like a little puppy Vermillion has to take care of. I'm not that great with grammar myself but I don't notice anything major out of place so if there is anything it's just a comma or some smaller things. I occasionally see a word slightly misspelled but for the most part it's well written and the extra accent in Vermillion's speech is a nice touch. Also... what's up with Valier and Nox? They seem oddly close for 'friends'. I guess we'll soon see. Overall this review doesn't feel very constructive o.o mostly just great job keep it up! Regardless I'll keep an eye out for more and even keep reviewing if you'd like.
They aren't friends, they're actually lovers ^^ Nox and Valier, I mean.
Ah! I got that impression but the character sheet at the beginning said they were friends and I'm not one to assume.