Soul Mates

Hey there!!

In your 3rd line: 'destined' is not the perfect word, I think. How about 'Born'?

In your 2nd line of the 3rd part: "Our love will grow to be as strong as a vine"
A vine is not that much strong.

In your 3rd line of the 3rd part: the word 'Divine' should be 'divine'.

I like your last four lines. After reading them a picture came in my mind. I saw Edward and Bella in the meadow. Thats what that made me love your last four lines.

"It's like listening to a never ending whisper" is not the suitable line. Because stepping into a flowing river or nerve shiver can't be like listening to something.

Overall it's a good one. Your imagination as well as your love is really praise worthy. Though this poetry is not that much rythmic but I like this. Keep writing.

Have a nice day. Good kuck and have fun.
Merry Christmas:)

Your writing friend,
Urba.

Good bye!!!

In honor of the fact that you did this for your boyfriend, I review!

"Chose" should be "choose" (you did it right in the second part of the line XD)
"In to" should be "into"
Is the line "makes my body cool" supposed to be positive? Sorry, but that's just worded weird. Normally, when someone is cold, they're afraid or nervous. I think you're trying to say you're calm, but in the context you used it, it doesn't come across exactly as that.

What is "like listening to a beautiful never ending whisper" referring to? Is it referring to your previous metaphor or the following line? Clean that up a bit.

You rhymed three things right after each other in a random part of the poem. In fact, your meter keeps shifting from rhyme to no rhyme so it's a bit hard to get into the flow of it.

Alright, before I get into meaning, the last few lines I thought you were talking about being buried next to each other for a minute XD idk I laughed when I realized my mistake.
Anywho, this all in all is a cute poem. Obviously you care a lot for this guy and I'm sure that will come across when he reads it. Honestly, you just need to do technical changes and maybe a bit of rewording, particularly on the parts I pointed out.

Great job, and I'm sure he'll love it!
Merry Christmas!
~Maddie

I don't normally review poetry but I really liked it! Overall I thought the poem would make a very beautiful and romantic present - you obviously put a lot of thought into it and I definitely found myself uplifted (and I must confess slightly teary) by the end of it.

The only thing I found a little confusing was the rhyming pattern: I mentally split the lines into groups of three but while some threes all rhymed "mine / vine / Devine" others didn't, such as "have / grass / say." I'd suggest you make the rhyming consistent so it flows more smoothly and doesn't leave the reader / listener thinking, "That sounded slightly odd - I was expecting that bit to rhyme."

The "Devine" bit should actually be "divine" (unless that's an intentional pun, perhaps on your boyfriend's surname) The "lay" should definitely be "lie" (and seeing as it's a romantic poem, there's room for misinterpretation...) "Plush green" (line 11) might be a better way of phrasing it than "green plush." Also, "grab" (line 12) is quite a strong (and possibly aggressive) verb - perhaps just "take your hand" would be more gentle and loving?

Apart from that I think it's a lovely poem. It was short enough to be interesting but not too short, and while I have little experience of the romantic side of things I would be very moved if someone I loved went to the effort of writing me such a poem for Christmas. My only other suggestion is that you read the poem out loud a few times and see if there's anything else you want to change. Hope I helped, and have a wonderful Christmas!