Warning: This work has been rated 18+.
⛓Speak No Evil⛓
TW: 18+ | Slight Descriptions of Violence | Mature Language
PT 394, Dimension Y-062
Hestia Lorenz
Hestia crawled from a walk to a full sprint when she came upon the starting position of Radio’s attack. Due to where their house was situated, she remembered the beginning of the attack well. Like an act of god, a giant red beam shot into the sky, painting it red. Where it began was none other than the defunct B.L.A.D.E HQ, a subsidiary of the United States government that dealt in the supernatural. They fell in 2050 (PT 350). Since the government struggled to bring itself together after this, nothing ever came of B.L.A.D.E. HQ, despite it replacing the Empire State Building and being the tallest building in the United States, even surpassing the One World Trade Center.
Hestia anxiously looked around, upon realizing nobody was present, she took the crowbar from her side and bashed it into the red paste that overtook the building. It broke like worn rock, she easily smashed through it. With just a few smashes, the red foundation began to crumble, causing Hestia to have to stumble backwards to avoid being crushed. The door was finally unveiled. She rushed to the door, slamming her crowbar in between the door and prying it open with all her strength.
She stumbled through the doors, nearly landing on her face. Hestia slid the crowbar between the handles of the steel entryway to keep intruders from following her in. Winded, she sat against the wall. Her throat tightened as memories came back.
Hestia’s inner monologue played catch-up with itself after all the events that transpired. “I was the last of the Lorenz family in the most valued timeline. The last living relative of the O’ so great Terra Lorenz! That’s why I’m so important. To them and to DRU. I just want it to end…”
She could only sit for seconds, because her mission wasn’t over. Get to the Terra Tree, by all means necessary. Hestia only heard stories about it. Terra allegedly sacrificed her life and turned herself into a giant Tree to merge all the realms. Olympus, Hell, Limbo, Earth, and more formed into one concurrent world. Through this, Hell could be reached by those on Earth. Same for Heaven. Hestia heard rumors that the defunct HQ had a faster route to Olympus, where the leaves of the Terra Tree were situated. Before Hestia made her choice, she needed to know the full story behind the Terra Lorenz she lived in the shadow of her entire life. As she contemplated, she heard a thud outside of the building. Followed by light splashing into the black building. The door was like mush to three Terras.
“No…” She winced. “They found me.” Hestia thought.
She prepared to run and hide, before she could even start, a splitting pain shot down her arm. Again, tendons were cut and stretched like the bending and breaking of an elastic. Hestia face-planted, any dreams she felt washing away in one moment.
She quickly recognized her attacker. Red Phoenix. She turned the Artemis armor into small pellets she could manipulate like bullets. Terra Diablada had a smile seemingly painted on, as her expression never changed. The two of them were led by Terra Lorbia, nicknamed “Little Terra” because her aging stopped when she was eighteen at the time of her death and descent to Hell. In her universe, Hell wasn’t exactly eternal torture. If you had the power to ascend in Hell, you did it. Just like Little Terra, a legend in Hell’s folklore. She was allegedly the founder of the Council of Terra, a united group of Terras that worked in secret to undermine DRU.
“Hestia. You’ve gotta come back with us.” Little Terra started. “I understand your place. I felt the same when I first discovered other dimensions. You can matter, now. You are the key to defeating DRU.” She insisted.
“I’m not going anywhere with you. You’ll have to kill me before you take me back to that council. I’m not your pet for everyone to ogle at!”
“Selfish brat.” Red Phoenix’s voice sliced through the air. “Do you understand how many we could save if you just come home?”
Hestia half-expected a response from Terra Diablada next, but she was nowhere to be found. Until she felt a sharp hand cover her mouth. Diablada’s other arm wrapped around her neck. It was hard, like she was made from plastic.
“You’re really starting to piss us off.” She hissed. Her voice was neither masculine nor feminine. She held Hestia close to her body, her numerous polygons and pixels stabbing into Hestia. “Who would you rather pick a fight with, DRU or the council?”
BANG!
A shot rang out. Hestia, suddenly finding that her head was free, looked around to see who had been hit. Not her, not the Terran before her, but her captor. Terra Diablada let out an inhuman screech that could best be described as a hiss. From her chest outward, she began to liquefy. Burning to dust as if a violent fire had been lit from her inside.
“All of you, back away from the glitch!” Petra cried. “Do you want to turn out just like your friend?! Back off!” She and Enzo slowly circled the other two Terras, who stood with their guards up. Red Phoenix seemed to be looking for an angle, but Petra didn’t even slightly let her leave her sight.
“Grab Hestia. You’re coming with us.” Petra demanded.
Enzo quietly obeyed Petra. Hestia didn’t say a single word as she took Enzo’s hand and limped after him.
Red Phoenix searched for Little Terra’s direction. “I’ll fire right now. We can’t lose th-”
“Don’t fire. We can wait. I want to see where this goes.” She responded confidently.
Red Phoenix looked to her boss with confusion as they watched Petra and Enzo drag their only hope away. Behind them, Terra Diablada reformed back into her normal, polygonal form. “How long was I out?” She chittered.
“Long enough for them to get away with Hestia.” Red Phoenix criticized as Diablada slowly turned herself back into a woeful puddle.
“Why’d you let them get away? I think I could’ve stopped her.” Red Phoenix asked.
“I didn’t want you to reveal our identity. We aren’t aware what this group has come equipped with. For all we know, they do not know who we are. Hestia will probably tell them. We can get her back easily enough, It’s not worth it to sacrifice one of the council members for her.” Little Terra explained.
“I guess that’s pretty smart.”
“We Terras aren’t exactly known for our strategy.”
________________________________________________________________________
Facility twenty-three was spotless upon entrance. There was a large empty room accompanied by stairs that led to another large empty room where the ceiling had caved in. On the ground floor, the group found a side room with just what they were looking for. Inside of the small room, was a tidy testing tube built for a human. Petra looked through some files that were stored by the original owner of the facility, Enzo examined the testing tube. Hestia sat against the wall examining them. However, she was not much for conversation. She quietly used her powers to heal her wounds from the run-in with the Council of Terra.
Enzo brushed the dust from the nameplate on the base of the tube. It read “Project Tempest”. They were in the right place, however, Enzo felt shallow. Like he was expecting more out of the revelation. He expected a newfound connection to his past life. Some sort of comfort. However, there was nothing.
Petra beckoned Enzo over. “Hey, Enzo. Stop looking so bored over there. Look what I found. It’s some sort of log from his creator.”
“What’s it say?” He asked dejectedly, still examining the testing tube.
Petra read. “I’ve tried to experiment on my older kids. But it seems they aren’t compatible, even Erica was a failed experiment. Me and Ivan kept trying until we got another powerless baby. Finally, it worked. Little Theodore is going to change the world. Ivan liked the nickname Theo. I think it fits. With Theo, project Tempest is born.”
She flipped through the next pages of the log, only for a photo to fly out and flutter onto Hestia’s lap. It was a photo of a happy family. Three kids, and a Mother and Father. They each wore labcoats, signaling their identities as the aforementioned Theo’s parents.
“Pah, I could’ve told you all this.” She bragged. “This is Jilaya, the Mom, Ivan, the Dad, their kids Erica, Axel and Theo. He’s the smallest kid that Jilaya’s holding.”
Hestia handed the picture to Enzo. There it was. That child could’ve been him. Perhaps it was, in the far reaches of his mind.
“Wow. You sure know a lot.” Enzo commented.
“Yeah, that’s the thing, Jilaya, AKA “Integer” seems like a nice lady, but there’s more to it. She’s also Terra’s biggest rival. She was part of a subsidiary of B.L.A.D.E-”
“Hold on.” Enzo stopped her. “Say that again.”
“Subsidiary of B.L.A.D.E?”
“No! She was Terra’s biggest rival, so this kid is Terra’s arch-nemesis's baby!”
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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Hello, My Friend!
It’s me, Raven, and I’m here to review the next chapter in this great story, using my Familiar method! Let’s dive right in, shall we?
~ A full analysis and breakdown
Ooo, heating up!! We get to see a little touch of action as the Terras fail to take Hestia, and they finally make it to facility twenty-three. Just the idea of exploring these ruins of Tempest's birthplace is pretty cool, but you managed to surprise me with that final revelation! I don't know exactly what I expected, but NOT that! Let's get into the details though.
Plot and Pacing: Great! Nice pacing, solid progression from start to finish. A part of me wishes for more drawn-out action, but I'm not going to complain, it makes sense for the Terras to hold off on attacking DRU agents, especially with Hestia getting in the way.
Descriptions and Setting: Lovely! The physics of Radio's enigmatic red substance continue to baffle me, how it crumbles like stone yet coats like wax. The little details like that really catch my attention.
Characterization: Ooo, I LOVED how you described Enzo's reaction to finding Tempest's chamber. That feeling of "well, we made it...now what?" Like whatever he is searching for, to find closure and come to terms with reality is deeper.
As for the Terras, I was very curious about their stated mission: destroy DRU. Does each Terra have their own reason, or is it one collective reason? Something to do with Sky, or an ex-Sentinel? And how will Hestia help them? SO curious...
Grammar and Wording: Overarchingly? No complaints!
~ Some nitpicks and little recommendations
Nothing to stick here this time! Great writing job ~
~ My reactions, theories, and favorite parts
No theories for now, because my brain is being slow for some reason lol. But onto reactions and highlights...
VERY interesting that the point of Radio's attack was a building dedicated to the supernatural...I'm not sure if this implies that the government was involved with her somehow, or if she had a grudge against them for some reason, or if it's just a coincidence...One thing for sure, it gets me wondering...I guess you can call that my theory for this chapter! lol
This much does make a lot of sense, for why both DRU and the Council want to keep Hestia for themselves. The last living Lorenz—yeah, that's gotta bear some heavy weight! I'm not sure what "most valued timeline" implies, unless I'm failing to remember something about the dimensions and such, but that also caught my eye. Is it just the timeline DRU considers the most "real" in a sense? huh...
DUDE, this sounds like SUUUUCH a cool concept!! I knew I was right to suspect something awesome from a magic tree! XD
Awesome lore drop for each of these Terras! I like how they all seem so different, from design to behavior, yet they functionally act similar to the Terra we know already—it's a trip! Also, Red Phoenix turning the Artemis armor into bullets she can manipulate? That. Is. AWESOME.
This Terra is an absolute trip to me—what even IS she? A digital relic? An android of sorts? A magical creature? Something else entirely? I love these sort of anomalous points in this universe.
Again, this point of reflection was great, and I really appreciated that bit of insight into Enzo's character, exploring this place.
OH SNAP, so this whole time, Tempest was the kid of that crazy lady that Terra fought tooth and nail to bring down, and essentially destroyed the life of? WILD! Ooo...now I'm curious if there were some prior motives at play, or something. This was a crazy reveal!! Also, the notes of Jilaya so casually saying essentially, "Yes, I am going to experiment on my child in hopes of causing some sort of mutation to artificially give them superpowers" is just gut-churning.
MadThoughts...Overall, that was awesome! Nicely done!
"They who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night."
"Words have no power to impress the mind without the exquisite horror of their reality.”
"I would define, in brief, the poetry of words as the rhythmical creation of Beauty."
Hello there, human! I'm reviewing using the YWS S'more Method today!
Shalt we commence with the mortifying S’more?
Top Graham Cracker - Hestia is found by the Terras, she’s briefly trapped before Enzo and Petra come save her, but the Terras need her to save the world, supposedly. So do Enzo and Petra. But what are they all gonna do to get what they want?
Slightly Burnt Marshmallow - I have no recommendations to make as of right now, but if you would like to edit this, then you may.
Chocolate Bar - I absolutely love the different Terras for how different they all are! I think that my favorite Terra is T3rra Diablada, because she seems very mysterious and for her polygonal look. I also like that Little Terra wants to see how it will go, it shows that she’s still interested in Hestia but willing to wait.
Closing Graham Cracker - Overall, a fantastic chapter to this story! I hope that Enzo, Petra, and Hestia can all work together in this and find some common ground and I hope I can learn more about the different Terras, but for now, I wish you…
A magical day/night! ^v^