When you say childhood
I remember nature
Acres of woods behind my house
All for us to explore
Every season of the year
I remember never going to school
I was homeschooled
Only two hours of work
And sometimes none at all
I remember my sisters
Racing to the duckpond minutes away
Taking shortcuts to get downtown through the woods
I remember saving my birthday money to buy
The princess walkie talkies
Twenty dollars
They didn’t work
But I still loved them
“My first phone”
I remember racing down hill on
Our razor scooters
The death of my ankles in other words
I remember wondering why some girls were
Obsessed with makeup
Or wear dresses
Or play with Barbies
I wore cargo shorts
I smudged berries from the woods on my face
I built forts from branches
Every summer I had scabs on my knees
From teaching myself how to skate
I remember trying to build a
Contraption
That would fly
How amazing it would be
If I could see the world
From way up
But when I was younger I couldn’t see
I was ignorant
I didn’t know what people thought of
People
Like
Me
The occasional murmur of
Terrorist
Or
Towel head
I remember
They saw me as Muslim before
They saw me as human
I remember
When my days of
carelessness
And
Freedom
Turned to
Fear
And
Self consciousness
Why do I have to always act perfect in public?
Why do people stare?
Why do people think I don’t speak English?
Why am I told to go back to my country?
But I’m from here
Why was I becoming ashamed of who I was?
I wasn’t Muslim enough to hangout with the Muslims
I don’t speak Arabic
I haven’t memorized more than 10 pages of Quran
I don’t pray five times a day
I don’t dress modestly enough
And
Not nonmuslim enough to hang out with the nonmuslims
I have that strange thing on my head
Are you bald?
Do you shower with that on?
Are your parents forcing you to wear that thing?
It can get lonely
Not being able to fit in
Not being proud
My childhood was bright and eventful
Most of the happiest moments of my life happened
When I was a child
But
I guess
Others
Opinions
Have ruined it
When you say childhood
I think of
When I learned that people are
Rude
Uneducated
Self centered
Careless
Insensitive
Racist
Violent
And problematic
When I learned about
9/11
I was twelve
I was informed that
All
Muslims
Were
Terrorists
They told me I was
Oppressed
And
Trapped
But
At one point in my life I
Dreamed
Of the days when I would wear my
Hijab
Now I don’t see it the same
I feel
ashamed
I feel
unworthy
I feel
Confused
And when I talk about it
They tell me
That
I’m obsessed with it
I’m playing the victim
Not everything is about it
Or I don’t mean it
I just want to know
Why are people so
Scared
Of a religion
Or
Why they would see me as a
Threat
I guess some people don’t
Understand
What
Hatred
Can do to a
Child
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139,320 Literary Works • 672,529 Reviews
That was truly touching and realistic. All muslims are stereotyped immensely, and you have shown that from an innocent child's eyes. People don't understand that if terrorists are Muslims, not all Muslims are terrorists. Every word in the poem struck me. You have written it in a simple language yet it conveys such a heavy meaning. This problem of judging on the basis of religion is a major one and you have put light on it. My favourite parts:
" I guess some people don't understand what hatred can do to a child."
"Now I don't see it the same."
"My days of carelessness and freedom turned to fear."
"Why are people so scared of a religion?"
Thank you so much! This means a lot to me!
This hits home right here. Absolutely heartbreakingly beautiful. I adore that you chose to keep it simple and not override the message with unnecessary filler such as intricate vocabulary when not needed, etc. This poem is definitely a winner in my eyes.
Usually, I don't like it when there's a lack of puncutation, but here it works. It comes off as a soliloquy or a train of thought. It adds a strange flow that works with the emotions behind the words.
I am a bit picky when I say I don't like all the capitalization, but that might just be a preference. So you can ignore that if you like it better that way.
My favorite parts:
and
If this was a true story or personal experience, I am horrified that you or someone else could go through something like that. I may not be Muslim, but I did have a Muslim friend. She was so shocked that I actually outwardly loved her culture. She thought I would be put off, and we were was only in third grade! I forced her to teach the little Arabic prayers she knew, and asked her about the Qu'ran because I was so curious.
Ignorance and fear are the parents of racism and discrimination. People just are afraid and hurting which in turn causes a lot of hurt. I mean the terrorists those aren't real Muslims, you know it, I know it. And in the end we're all people, together on this planet.
I may not have been discriminated that harshly, but I did face stereotypes growing up being one of the three Asians in my large school district. Asian kind of meant Chinese, so people assumed that's what I was. I was constantly asked the same questions. Do you guys eat dogs? Why do you eat those things like smelly fish and pig feet? Why aren't your eyes squinty? My mother was from the Philippines and once in the fifth grade, everyone for two months wouldn't even stand next to me. Turns out someone was passing rumors that because I'm Filipino and the Philippines is a group of islands that we were cannibals.
Keep up the good work! Loved this poem
I can't believe people said those awful things to you. The poem was written off of personal experiences, so sadly all those things did happen.
I loved the feedback, especially about the capitalization.
Thank you so much!
Stay strong and proud of your culture. They're just ignorant people, fearful people. It will get better
Hey! I'm gonna try to review this thing.
I don't know what it's like to be Muslim in America. So I hadn't really examined that perspective before. But this poem shows what it's like, or at least a bit of it. It shows your experience. And I think the way you show it through this poem is well done.
The poem transitions from happy, ignorant childhood memories to the harsh reality of discrimination... and that transition is delivered really well. I can vividly see the person who you are describing: their likes, their interests, their struggles, their feelings. When I read this poem, I watch this person grow and transition with the words, and I felt every word. That especially goes for the last parts of this poem, with the lines growing shorter, chopping to one word, emphasizing emotions, actions, feelings. Contrasting with the beginning of the poem, the words hit harder, each broken line a stamp into the beating heart of the reader, an imprint into the reader's brain. In that respect, well done.
I also like the repetition of the line, "When you say childhood." It brings ideas together, and as more ideas and feelings are introduced, more layers are added onto that phrase's meaning. It doesn't seem to be repeated often, and maybe if you repeated it more often between ideas, it might be able to pull together more ideas and solidify that repetition. It just might bring the repeating of that line more to light. But of course, that is completely up to you. Your story, your poem, right?
One typo:
It should be Others' not Others, with that apostrophe. That way it's possessive.
Overall, I found this poem not only enjoyable, with evolving ideas and structure over time, but also thoughtful and... righteous? That might be the right word. This is true and hard and raw in language. (That rawness is mostly the reason why I'm not exactly recommending more use of imagery or flowery language, because the lines you are already using work well in that raw respect.) Thank you for this poem. I think others will find a lot of meaning in it.
Also, welcome to YWS!
Thanks for the feedback, I definitely think that I could've added the line "When you say childhood" more. I also hadn't even noticed the typo, so thanks for pointing it out! I liked that you added a little analysis at the end there, it really helped wrap up your review for me.
Thank you!!!
This is heartbreaking <333