A/N: Don't complain, I got it out before a month went by... xD A raw draft of chapter 7, unedited (aka I have not removed the semicolons yet, dont worry about them). Sorry to keep you waiting.
“Jacob, wake up,” a voice whispered to him in the darkness. He opened his eyes and saw a shadowy figure next to him. It didn’t take long before he soon realized the silhouette was Lea, after having his eyes adjusted to the dim candlelight in her left hand.
“Lea? What’s going on?” he asked her, confused by her appearance.
“We have to leave now. At dawn, the king will send word for me. I am to marry the Prince of Burumstone, for the alliance between the north and the west,” Lea explained. “You have to hurry,” she nagged at him, all stressed out.
“I just woke up, will you calm down?” Jacob questioned her, irritated over how she was acting.
Lea sighed. “I’m sorry, it’s just that we really have to hurry. Get your clothes on, and we’ll be ready to leave. Whatever is necessary you can bring along, only remember that the more lightweight we travel, the faster we can move.”
He quickly got up of the bed, resulting in Lea covering her eyesight with her free hand.
“Could you at least tell me you were getting up first?” she asked him.
“I thought you’d figure it out yourself,” he replied.
“Yes, I did.”
On the desk Lea had sat by yesterday, Jacob spotted a white doublet on top of a dark brown leather jerkin without sleeves. Next to those, he saw a pair of leather boots, some linen trousers along with a weapon belt. He quickly dressed himself and buckled his belt around the jerkin.
A sheath and a scabbard was attached to his weapon belt, which made him wonder what the point of those two was without any blades to fill them. ¨
“Did you bring any weapons?” Jacob asked her and turned around towards her.
She walked over to a tall cupboard made of a slightly dark deal wood and opened the doors. The inside was empty, except for something packed inside a piece of cloth.
“Did you really think I wouldn’t bring any weapons?”
He rolled his eyes in reply while Lea grabbed the weapons and put them down on the bed. Her hands unfolded the cloth and revealed the blades inside it. One was a simple dagger, the other a broadsword, decorated with the banner of Asgard; a dragons head.
The grip had a golden colour, coming from the coloured leather around it. Following the rest of the style, the pommel was the head of a dragon, made of gold. Someone had clearly spent a lot of time on it.
“I couldn’t visit the forge, so I brought the ones I could find…”
“Wow. Where did you get that broadsword from?” Jacob asked her, impressed over its details.
“It’s one of our family swords; it has been in our family for about 300 years.”
“That’s a long time.”
“Yes I guess you could say so. We had better get moving now. Get the dagger and the sword and we can go.”
“Of course,” he said, and sheathed his broadsword and dagger.
He walked out of the room with Lea, closing the heavy door after them. The hallway was a dark, except for Lea’s candle, which was still the only source of light. From the rooms, Jacob heard loud snoring, taking him back to the soldier camps in England.
Even though it was a couple of years back since the war, he could still remember them; full of tents, tight upon each other. There were always tasks to do back there. Some would sit by the bonfire sharpening the knives for battle, or perhaps make new arrows. Others would practice their weapon skills and reflexes, unless they weren’t too drunk from ale of course.
They moved in a fast pace; Lea in the front with Jacob behind. She led him downstairs to the ground floor. From the little light he had, he noticed a curved bar to his left, in front of it, five wooden chairs with possibly leather seats. Further, away from them across the room, he saw loads of tables, chairs and something that could be a hearth. It was hard for him to decide exactly what it was.
He noticed a big iron padlock even more to the left, locking the front door to the wall. They would for certain, not get past that thing unnoticed. He really hoped Lea had something else in mind, unless it was something completely mad, like a dragon.
She pointed at a door behind the bar. “That’s where the innkeeper sleeps,” she whispered.
“The door is locked. No way we’ll get past it without waking everyone the whole inn.”
Lea frowned. “That’s why I have another plan. Follow me,” she said and started walking. Just as quick as she’d started, Lea turned around and spoke, “Also, try to be quiet when walking. We don’t want any trouble.”
They stepped lightly forward, crossing the room, and sneaked down to cellar. The cellar was surprisingly colder than ground floor, sending a chill through his body. He thought that the food storage was probably here, reminding him he had barely eaten much, except for the porridge he’d eaten earlier.
Once they came, Lea grabbed something from her pocket, a little golden key. She inserted it into the door and opened it. The old wooden piece produced a tiny squeak and cleared the way into darkness.
A blow of moist and thick air met them. A smell filled his nose, almost as a mix of dirt and old, damp wood. To Jacob, it was completely pitch black in there, despite the light from Lea’s candle.
“A tunnel,” said Jacob. His voice echoed.
“Indeed,” she answered. “It was dug forth only six years ago. The innkeeper’s daughter and I used to be good friends, as the innkeeper is a rich lord. She showed me them without her father knowing, of course,” Lea explained to him.
She grabbed a piece of wood from a wall sconce, and lit it up with her candle. Straight away, light spread out across the walls. Jacob realized how rich the lord must be, as the tunnel consisted of light bricks.
“I see. How far does it go?”
“It goes all the way through Asgard, to the woods.”
Jacob remembered the forest they had passed on their way. He was sure they had not been alone there.
“What woods? The ones we passed on our way?” he questioned, a bit nervous.
“Yes, I guess so,” she replied and started walking.
The tunnel wasn’t broad enough for two, so he walked behind her. "Are you out of your mind?” he asked in a more serious tone.
Lea looked at him over her shoulder. “Why?”
“Night-time, wolves. God knows what other animals exist out there, if there’s dragons too.”
He could clearly imagine what other wild beasts were lurking in the darkness of the night. Some of his first thoughts were giant, flying griffins roaming the sky, or perhaps a basilisk’s eye suddenly meeting yours, doomed to die.
In front of them, a small staircase appeared as they were walking. They climbed the stairs, at least what it was of it, up to a thick door of oak.
Lea produced another key from her cloak and stuck it into the oaken door, unlocking it.
Fresh, salty air struck Jacob’s face as the door opened. Outside, the world was pitch black, and most of all; quiet. Not a single soul to hear, except for low waves pounding against rocks and sand. Drizzle fell down from the sky as well, hitting him all over the face.
“Now as we’re through the passage, we could sleep for a couple of hours,” Lea said. “There’s a cave down there by the beach.” Her head nodded shortly towards it. “What do you say?”
We couldn’t have slept for long. Two hours, maybe?
“Sounds good. Haven’t slept in ages, if you don’t count the few hours we had now.”
“Alright, just remember that we have to keep on moving in a couple of hours again,” she reminded him. “There should be a little boat inside the cave, if nobody has been there. My brother and I used to ride over here when we we’re little, so I know the area well enough.”
Down by the cave, the temperature was slightly warmer than outside, thankfully. A long boat of hardwood was there, as Lea had told him about. To his surprise, the waves made him even sleepier than he was. Jacob barely loosened his weapon belt before his eyelids fell, and his consciousness a little after little slipped away from him.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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Hello Zont, Wolf here for a review.
A month, really? To be honest, this isn't that spectacular, but I still liked it dont get me wrong. It just seems too outrageous of a wait for something so short. Please, please, please, try to get the next part out sooner, you're killing me with all these sudden endings. More please. D:
Few nitpicks/
I think you know what's up here.
I don't understand what is trying to be said here. The stairs was of what? Please make it more clear whatever was trying to be said.
He did at least to into the boat before he passed out, right? So make sure you make that clear and not just make us think he passed out on the ground next to the boat. (Hey, he could just be staring out into the waves rather than in them.) Okay, thinking about it more, I'm not sure if he actually did get into the boat, but the wave thing makes me think otherwise. Moral of the story, clear that up.
You have really nice imagery, and I got all kinds of images in my mind of what these items and places would look like, and I really like that. The interactions between the characters is really nice, and I like seeing more of Jacob's character. (I'm not good with analyzing plot and characters, don't judge >.<) Anyways... Keep Writing,
~Wolfare
Thanks for your review Wolf!
I know, I know. BUT I've been writing on a later chapter as well and creating cities and such, based on how it was spread out in the old days. xD
At least I had some better imagery now. I'll clear the other stuff up as soon as I get some time for it.
Thanks again! ^^
- Zontafer
At first I had no idea what a weapon belt was until I read further, but I like that you explain it to us, without telling us exactly it was an empty weapon belt. If you understand that.
I felt as though the back story of how men reacted to war was compared to snoring, when you never mentioned anyone snoring in his past, you kinda just said tents were put up.
This does not flow, "They would for certain, not get past that thing unnoticed."
Please make sure I am reading this right, “The door is locked. No way we’ll get past it without waking everyone the whole inn."
-I don't know the ending just sounds confusing.
"The old wooden piece produced a tiny squeak and cleared the way into darkness. "-Very good imagery.
"She grabbed a piece of wood from a wall sconce, and lit it up with her candle. Straight away, light spread out across the walls."- this piece made me crack up, cause I thought of Narnia 2 when she did that.
I like that the male character has jokes but they're all humorless and he's bad with his sarcasm. I like that his story is very Mystical and enchanted and it's a cute faery tale story, dragons and magic and mystery. It just sounds cute.
I felt as though the words were to big. I mean you can say, sheath. But maybe telling us how you put the knife in a sheath would be much better-clearer. I wasn't looking for grammar though, sorry. I was looking for a good read.
You still don't disappoint!
Thank you for the review!
About the snoring, I've added that in the 'updated' version, so sorry for that!
I'll take what you said further on when editing!
Thanks again! ^^
- Zontafer
This makes sense now, "They would for certain, not get past that thing unnoticed."
I just read it incorrectly