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Moonlight Saga: Lost Throne ~ Chapter 1.1 - First Meetings

by XxXTheSwordsmanXxX


Word Count: 1031

“I don't see why I have to learn about this,” Princess Re'ana said. “The wall was made centuries ago and it's still standing. It keeps the bad things out and keeps us safe. Why do I need to know any more than that?”

“Because if you want to be a wise ruler, you must learn from the mistakes of those that came before you,” the old tutor said with an exasperated tone. “It's important that you know this. With a lack dependable commerce, due to the dangers outside the wall and the continuous war with the Heagan Empire, Tel’mara is forced to fend for itself. You need to understand why your ancestors made the decisions they did so that you can continue to make decisions that will strengthen your people.”

“It's boring is what it is. Let's go on to something else.” Re'ana said looking at her reflection in the mirror that covered the entire wall to her left. She returned one of her rebellious locks of her raven black hair back to its proper place behind her ear before turning her irritated gaze back on the tutor.

“Very well, Princess. What topic would you like to study?”

“Truth be told, I find them all to be horribly dull. Let's end this lecture so that I can get back to much more important matters.”

“Their majesties have ordered me to tutor you until you are ready to begin studies of your own with them. In a few short years you will be in your prime, married, and leading this country. The people outside the wall expect you to make good, well-informed decisions that will benefit the entire kingdom.” The old tutor sighed as he noted that Re’ana had not listened to a single word he had said. “As the other subjects seem to be even duller to you, we will continue with history.” The tutor continued with his lesson about why the fifty foot high wall was built to protect the first settlers of the country from the creatures that populated the world and the armies of the Heagan Empire nearly a millennium passed.

Re'ana rested her chin in her hand as she quickly grew bored with the lecture and began to daydream about a gallant knight, like the ones from her story books, coming and whisking her away on a life of adventure and romance. When the elegant arms of the grandfather clock struck two, releasing the resounding toll of the bell, Re'ana was quickly on her feet and heading out the doors as the tutor was still trying to tell her about the lesson. “How were your lessons, princess?” a young servant quietly asked attempting to catch up to Re'ana's quick pace.

“A complete waste of my time, Leena,” Re'ana snapped as she hurried to her room within the luxurious castle. Halls of ornate tapestries and paintings lined the halls with marbles floors and high ceilings that were kept lit by the large windows that let in the sunlight. “Learning about things that happened ages ago and don't affect me in the present. It's completely ridiculous.” Throwing open the doors of her room, she strode across the polished stone to the soft carpet that lay in front of the currently lit fireplace and two ornate chairs faced at an angle toward the hearth. A large bed with flowing drapes sat across from the small sitting area and a large wardrobe, filled with elegant dresses, rested against the wall. “I just want some gallant knight to come riding in and take me on a wonderful adventure. He'd adore me and slay horrible beasts, and I would live in the riches of his exploits.”

“And no doubt make him penniless with all the spending that you would do,” a woman said standing at the door, dressed in an elegant sapphire gown that skirted the floor. Leena bowed quickly as the queen entered the room. She almost seemed to hover with the graceful and even steps that she took to cross the room. An older servant behind the queen hurried to keep pace with her should the need for her arise. “I hear from William that you are being difficult with your studies.”

“I just fail to see what learning about a wall has to do with being queen,” Re'ana responded.

The queen let out a frustrated sigh and looked to the servants, who understood the silent command and quickly left, before returning her gaze onto the princess. “You are my daughter, and as such you must conduct yourself with elegance and humility. Learning about 'a wall' is just as important as learning how to lead a country. One day your father and I will not be here and you will be responsible for making decisions that best benefit the country, not just yourself.” Her irritation evident from, once again, repeating the importance of Re’ana’s studies. “The Heagan Empire is at our door waiting for a chance to take this land back from us and if you continue to ignore your responsibilities they will take it.”

“That still doesn't explain the boring lectures.”

“Knowing the reasons for why our ancestors built the wall gives you insight as to what kind of queen you want to be. One that does what is best for her people and not necessarily for her own desires. One day, you may have to make a decision that affects the entire nation, or to forgo your duty for your own desires.”

“When I am queen, I will make sure to let my advisers make the important decisions. That's what they’re there for.” Re'ana perched herself on the window seat that overlooked the city below with her book.

“Not all advisers base their advice in the best interest of royalty. Some will take the opportunity of the power you would give them to line their pockets with coin, all the while blaming you for the current state of the kingdom as it crumbles into ruin.”

“Then I'll marry a man that can take care of all that himself and doesn't need me for menial decisions.”

https://www.youngwriterssociety.com/work/XxXTheSwordsmanXxX/Moonlight-Saga-Lost-Throne--Chapter-12--First-Meetings-128069

https://www.youngwriterssociety.com/work/XxXTheSwordsmanXxX/Moonlight-Saga-Lost-Throne--Chapter-13--First-Meetings-128076

https://www.youngwriterssociety.com/work/XxXTheSwordsmanXxX/Moonlight-Saga-Lost-Throne--Chapter-14--First-Meetings-128085

https://www.youngwriterssociety.com/work/XxXTheSwordsmanXxX/Moonlight-Saga-Lost-Throne--Chapter-15-Final--First-Meetings-128118


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75 Reviews


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Reviews: 75

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Sat Apr 02, 2016 1:41 pm
ChieTheWriter wrote a review...



This is really good! I'm definitely going to read the other chapters. There were some slight grammar errors though. Like this one:

"It's boring is what it is."

A better choice of words would have been-

"It's boring that's what it is."

-or-

"Boring is what it is."

But i didn't really catch anything else. I was great and KEEP WRITING! I want to find out what happens!




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284 Reviews


Points: 4250
Reviews: 284

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Tue Mar 29, 2016 6:02 pm
RubyRed wrote a review...



Greetings, XxXTheSwordsmanXxX. I found the start of your story to be very interesting. In fact, I almost became engrossed, and I wanted to keep reading; but I came tot the end of the first part of this chapter. This actually inspired me for my book, which is similar to this one. I didn't find any grammar mistakes, but you have need for some punctuation. For instance, when you join two independent words with the conjunctions: and, but, or, nor, for, yet. You need a comma. Also, you could space things better. Whenever I have dialog, I press 'enter' and then do dialog that way it can easily be seen. Sorry my review couldn't have been longer. Keep writing and never get discouraged!

~Keepwriting

P.S. On to the next part! :D






I'm glad you liked the story so much. And I am not gonna lie. Grammar is my Achilles Heel. I have never been good at it. What I need is a grammar Nazi to come through and help me with it. lol. Thanks for the review I hope you enjoy the rest of the story.




In the past I would definitely say who you would find inside. Not so much today. Place is bonkers …. As is everywhere
— Greg Specter