Published July 9, 2017
Warning: This work has been rated 18+ for language, violence, and mature content.
Chapter 15 – Princess Irene – Acceptance
"Wow... How long has it been since you left, two years?" Marin asks nostalgically as she stares into my eyes. Her eyes appears to shine with interest.
"Yeah, I think it was a little more than that, though," I reply with a smile, thinking back to the days I spent with her.
"It's good to see you again… I've missed you…" she says quietly. I pick up on her tone that seems like it's filled with sadness. She's blushing. I zoom in on her slightly parted lips and then gulp. My heartbeat is racing, and my lips twitch uncontrollably. I find myself darting my eyes, checking her out from top to bottom. She wears a modest purple tank top pairing with black pants. My eyes pop back up to her chest, which has greatly matured since the last time I saw her.
I turn toward the bar. I don't want to give too warm of a response worrying that she will become attached again, so I say in a voice devoid of emotion, "You too… You've grown a lot since then."
I pick up my stout and then drink some more. In a cheery voice, she remarks, "Not as much as you, though!"
A slight shiver goes down my spine as I wonder what she's referring to. I look between my legs and then find my enraged friend. My face gets hot and then I mutter, "Wh-what…? I'm sure you've grown more than me…"
"What're you talking about? You've grown at least a few inches taller…and I've only grown a little…" she informs while gesturing her hands in front of her, indicating our height difference.
"Oh…that's what you meant…" I mutter to myself. She cocks an eyebrow.
"What did you think I meant…?" I don't answer and just take more sips of my drink. Her face turns red after a few seconds. Suddenly, she giggles. She looks at me and exclaims, "That part of you hasn't changed at all, Kai!"
She smiles. I force a smile and then apologize, "Well, sorry for being a guy… By the way, should you really be going around without your equipment?"
"I didn't think there would be any danger around town. Besides, Ruby can care take of anything if something happens!" she claims confidently. Afterward, we take more gulps of our beverages. While I'm drinking, the ceiling makes a small noise. I look above, finding the lantern that's attached to the ceiling swinging around a little. I tilt my head down and then shake my head and sigh.
"Kai…" Marin says quietly, hesitating to continue. I know what she wants to relay based on her facial expression that I've seen before. "Have you thought about…visiting—"
"Stop it," I cut her off in a stern tone. "Don't talk about her anymore; she's dead."
She makes a small sound before she exclaims, "Oh, that's right! How goes your search for Emdos? Did you find any new clues?"
I sense sincerity in her voice as if she really wants to know the answer to that question. I frown, feeling bad about lying to her more, but at the same time, I don't want to disappoint her. Moans and grunts resound from above. The ceiling shakes violently. My mind focuses on the sound and tremors, feeling like they grow louder by the second.
"Yeah I think I found a lead, here in Byzia. Some blacksmith mentioned about seeing someone that matches his description a couple of months back. I'm still looking around for more clues before I leave, though," I say with a firm tone, trying to divert my attention from the distracting noises upstairs.
"That's good to hear…that you're making progress on your goals…" she says with a gradual emerging smile. I smile too, feeling some warmth stirring inside me.
She sips her beer for several seconds before I ask, "So, what's the Drosera army doing here in Xantho? You're here with Ruby and Jetia, right?
Marin's expression doesn't change as she continues to take sips from her drink. Several seconds pass before she puts it down and faces me. She darts her eyes around, restlessly moves her fingers with her fingers clasped, and says "Well… I don't know if I should tell you since you're not a part of us anymore…"
With a serious facial expression, she stares into my eyes. "Don't tell anyone I told you, okay?"
I momentarily pause before responding, knowing that I probably can't keep that promise depending on what she tells me. While smiling I exclaim, "Marin, you can trust me!"
She briefly reciprocates a smile, but then her facial expression becomes solemn again. "About a week ago, we received an anonymous report about possible Cascabel movements in Xantho."
I knit my eyebrows. "We arrived a few days ago and had been investigating it since."
I gulp before asking, "Di-did you find out anything pertinent?"
She closes her eyes before she answers, "Yeah, we found something yesterday. We luckily stumbled upon a few soldiers who were frantically yelling in the middle of Byzia…"
I cock an eyebrow and ask, "What were they yelling about?"
"They said something about the 'Phantom Swordsman' and 'The Witch' being here plotting a heinous plan." She opens her eyes and then gazes at me. It feels like they can see right through me. My heart beats like a drum as a shiver goes down my spine. I hold my breath, scared stiff of Marin discovering my identity.
"I know 'The Witch' is an Elf… Have you seen any suspicious Elves around here, Kai?" she simply asks, but it feels like an interrogation.
My eyes are a little shaky, so I avoid eye contact when I reply, "N-no… I might've seen a few different Elves within the past few months, but they're probably long gone now. Besides, none of them really looked…menacing…"
I immediately think of my first meeting with Leila, sending more shivers down my spine.
"I guess you're right… I can't go suspecting every Elf around here…" she says concedingly as she looks away from me. A heavy weight on my shoulders is lifted as I sigh to myself, but another jolt hits me when she looks back at me without warning. In a suggestive tone, she asks, "Have you seen the 'Phantom Swordsman'?"
I frown while knitting my eyebrows and then summon my inner calm. "Is he an Elf too? If he is, my answer is the same as before… "
"Oh? How did you know he was male?" It feels like a knife stabbing through me as she catches my mistake. My entire face burns up, and I feel my heart beating out of my chest. Instinctively, I open my mouth and without thinking say, "I just figured that since he dual-wields two swords…"
"Hmm… He dual-wields two swords, huh…?" The smile that appears on her face petrifies me. I realize the stupidity in my response. I gulp and freeze up. She stares intently at me while her expression melts into a grim one. "Speaking of dual-wielding, don't you use that too? You're actually the 'Phantom Swordsman', aren't you?"
I laugh. It sounds forced. "Wh-what are y-you ta-talking about…?"
She doesn't let up her expression at all and simply frowns as she continues to stare at me. My head quivers left and right as I look down and away from her. It feels like time is passing extraordinarily slow, but only five seconds pass, when suddenly, she starts laughing. I quirk an eyebrow as the intense atmosphere dissolves.
"What’re you being so serious about? I was just kidding!" she exclaims with an innocent smile. Her volume decreases when she continues, "You're so fun to tease…in a lot of ways…"
My heart is still racing, but my body stops shaking. A breeze cools my moist forehead. Did I read too much into it…?
Several seconds pass before she says, "Hey, Kai—"
A sudden loud crash resounds above us. The lantern on the ceiling is swinging more widely than before. The moaning and grunting have both stopped, but obnoxiously loud laughing fills my ears. I close my eyes as she asserts, "Kai, why don't you come back to the army? We finally have a lead again, and we can find the people responsible for—"
"After you find them…then what? Will they be imprisoned or killed? It doesn't matter… In the end; they will never come back…" I explain, projecting part of myself onto her in the process. In reality, I feel the same as her, but I don't want to drag her toward the danger. She doesn't know how brutal Cascabel really is. Afterward, she only makes a small noise while pouting.
During the silence, a man above us yells, "Wait! Please! I'm sorry! Don't do it!"
Next, I pick up on Ruby manically laughing again, before a booming noise erupts from above us. The tremors reach the stool I'm sitting on. Agonizing screams follow, indicating that I should probably leave before Ruby comes back down.
"What the hell was that?!" the bartender exclaims. I quickly down the rest of my drink, slam the mug on the counter, and then get up, but Marin grabs my hand.
"Wait!" she exclaims. I turn toward her, finding that tears are welling up in her eyes. "Tell me the real reason you left… It's because of me, isn't it…? I know your excuse about Emdos is a lie…"
My heart beats twice in a single beat as I realize she knew all along. I close my eyes for a moment and then take a deep breath. In my most earnest tone of voice, I answer, "No, it's not, Marin. In fact, I'm really grateful to you… You were there for me when everything was just so fucked up…"
Footsteps resound near the top of the staircase. I pause for about two seconds before continuing, "I can't tell you the real reason; I'm sorry…"
Suddenly, Marin moves my hand closer to her; it rests snugly between her breasts. She proposes, "Then…spend tonight with me! We can tell each other secrets like we used to!"
Her face is flushed completely red. I blush too, and I get excited, but I hold myself back. At this point, footsteps resound like they're going down the stairs. "Marin~!"
I ignore Ruby's voice and forcefully pull my hand back. Tears are spilling from her eyes as I do, also delivering my barely audible response, "Sorry…"
Some tears are welling up in my eyes too, but I hold them back. I say under my breath, feeling some tears welling up in my eyes too, but I hold them back. As I turn my back toward her, I quietly say, "It was nice seeing you again… I'll visit and tell you everything, eventually…"
There's a slight pain and tightness in my chest as I walk forward. I stop right in front of the exit when Ruby asks, "Marin, what's wrong? Are ya cryin'?"
"N-no… I'm just a little tired… How did your end go?"
She sniffles. I scrunch my eyebrows together when a tear runs down my cheek.
"He didn't know anythin' useful, that liar…so I killed 'im!" Ruby cheerfully and calmly states. "The room's kinda damaged though…"
"What did you say?!" the bartender yells.
"It can't be helped… It's a good thing we brought a lot of gold with us… Sir, take this as compensation."
Several coins roll onto the counter. "Oh! Yes, this will do. Thank you very much…"
"Thank ya, Marin! Were ya talkin' ta someone?"
"Umm…yeah, I was… It was a local… I asked him about the usual…"
"Hmm… I'm goin' ta join ya fer a bit. I'll have what she has!"
I close my eyes as a wave of nostalgia hits me again. I think about the days I spent in the Drosera army, the good days and the bad. It wasn't a complete lie, Marin… I'm still looking for Emdos, to this day… I still don't know what you saw in me… We were just sad and broken… We weren't meant to be…
I take a deep breath, exhale, and then wipe my tears on my arm. Afterward, I finally open my eyes and then walk out the door. Goodbye, Marin…my second love…
"I didn't think I would have to see yer ugly face again, traitor," Jetia says as he's standing against the building. Neither Utna nor her father are around anymore.
I don't wanna see your fucking face either… I scowl for a moment but then relax. Without emotion, I inform, "Well, I was just on my way out."
I walk forward and don't stop even when he exclaims, "Yer only good at running away, aren’t you?!"
I clench my fists and jaws. "Yer running from Marin just like how you ran from her!"
I stop just in front of the porch as he continues to yell with contempt.
"You were too scared to fight Cascabel, so you deserted! Look at you now; it's pathetic! It won't be long until she realizes that I'm a much better man…and you'll know what I'll do after that, right?"
A rage stirs in me as he snickers. Like a boiling pot of water with the lid on. I grind my teeth back and forth as I contort my face into a frown.
"I bet you just ran away with yer tail between yer legs when yer friends died one by—"
I turn around, point at him with my finger, and scream, "Shut the fuck up!"
A tightness that surrounds my throat and chest discomforts me. It feels like the steam in the boiling pot of water erupted and blasted through the lid.
"You don't fucking know anything; you piece of shit," I say as I step toward him, clenching my right fist so hard that the cracking of my knuckles resound.
"Whoa there… I'm going to have the right to defend myself if you go any farther…" he states as he pulls out his sword. Shortly after, two pairs of footsteps approach from inside the tavern.
"Jetia, what's going on out there?" Marin asks. I click my tongue, back away, and then turn around. There are a bunch of people staring at me. I run away.
"That's right Kai, run away…" Jetia says and then laughs. I turn my head back toward the tavern when I think I ran far enough. Marin and Ruby are talking to Jetia. Soon after, they head into the tavern together. But not before Jetia turns his head toward me and then smirks as he puts an arm around Marin.
Shit! I grimace as I throw a full-on straight with my right arm into the nearby stone wall. The actual cracking of my bones resound as pain radiates from my knuckles. Hot puffs of air escape me as I press my bloody knuckle harder into the wall. I spend the next fifteen minutes wondering if I made the right choices up to now. I sit against the wall and look down as I think. Maybe Jetia's words had some truth to them… Even I'm surprised I got so worked up just now… I guess I never came to terms with leaving Marin when I left… Perhaps I need to come to terms with her too…
I finally get up and then make my way back toward 'The Simple Forge.'
Chapter 16 – Princess Irene – Contradiction
I arrive and open the door with my left hand to 'The Simple Forge.'
"Oh, you're finally back?" the blacksmith asks from the back of the store. I close the door behind me. My arm guards, leg guards, and swords are already on top of the table near the entrance. "I'll be with you in a second."
I walk toward my sword sheaths and then attempt to grab it with my right hand. When I curl my fingers, the pain in my hand intensifies. I draw my hand back and refrain from picking up anything while waiting for him to come back. Fifteen seconds later, he comes out holding an enclosed box. He hunches over and then drops it on the ground in a corner of the main room, creating a loud noise when it hits the floor. Metal clangs from inside the box. He straightens his posture before taking a quick sigh and then turns to me. He walks toward me and asks, "Kai, where were you? I almost thought you weren’t coming back considering that it's been an hour since you left."
"Well… I bumped into an old acquaintance, so we caught up a little," I respond hesitantly as I shrug my arms. He knits his eyebrows.
"Your—my god, what happened to your hand? Did you meet with your worst enemy?" I smile and laugh lightly while looking at my right hand.
"Ah, this? I felt like punching a wall, so I did. Don't worry about it," I explain with an apathetic look on my face. He quirks his lips and shakes his head.
"If you say so, but damn…that looks painful."
"Yeah… If you don't mind just put those arm guards and leg guards on me, would you?"
"Coming right up." He picks up the arm guards, and I straighten out my arms toward my sides. He equips my right arm first, then my left. Afterward, he picks up the leg guards and does the same to my legs. Finally, he unsheathes one of my swords and then holds it in his right hand in front of him. "This might be a little heavier than what you're used to, but it's the best I can offer you. It’s a decent sword."
He smiles as he slashes the air in front of me. I smile and raise my eyebrows, confirming my previous suspicions of his origins. "Why'd you quit being an adventurer?"
He suddenly becomes still. He stops smiling and remains expressionless for several seconds before he sheathes the sword again. He clips the sheaths onto my belt above my hips and answers, "That was a long time ago… Sorry, it's something I don't like remembering. I'm just a lowly blacksmith now."
Despite that he shows no emotions, I sense loneliness in his voice, feeling empathy for him. I close my eyes as I say, "No… I understand… My comrades were killed too, in the past."
"Is that so… But you're stronger than me. I didn't have the courage to continue when I witnessed the death of my comrades. I couldn’t take it anymore. So, I left and just became a blacksmith," he says while looking at the ground.
I open my eyes and then turn toward the exit. "I wouldn't say that. I'm not strong at all…"
"Lies. I saw it when I met you earlier today, and I still see it now. There's a fire in your eyes. Something that drives you towards your goals…" he says as he walks toward the back of his store. "Best of luck to you, Kai. Don't run from your past like I did."
I leave his shop and then head back toward 'Bolt's Inn' while thinking about the blacksmith's words. I open the door to our room, apparently unlocked. I go in.
"You're late," Leila says the moment I enter the room. She stands against the wall right next to the door.
"Oh, am I?" I ask in a joking manner and then laugh.
She stares me down. "It better not have to do with that equipment you have on you… The last time I checked, you didn't have any money on you."
"It kinda does… I went to pick it up for free be-before I came back here…" I answer reluctantly, despite feeling that she would take it the wrong way.
"You mean to say, you stole it," she accuses as she closes in her head closer to me. She gives me a suspicious frowning look on her face. I only smile in response.
I face my palms out in front of me and explain, "Nah, I really got it for free… You remember that man you gave ten gold coins to? He…"
I stop talking when Leila suddenly grabs my right arm. She cocks an eyebrow as she inspects my hand from various angles, before placing her hand over my wounds. She casts Healing magic while staying completely silent. She's focused. Several seconds pass before I quirk my lips and then ask, "You-you're not gonna ask what happened?"
She doesn't change expressions when she replies, "I'm used to it by now. It was probably something stupid, like punching a wall. It doesn't really matter. So, what was it about that man?"
I chuckle and smile before answering, "That man turned out to be a blacksmith… I bumped into him while gathering information and he offered to repair my armor and gave me everything else I currently have on me."
I leave out the information that he was never serious about the ten gold coins. Leila releases my hand and then says, "All done. Let's exchange the information we discovered so far. You go first."
I give a summary of all relevant information I found in the last couple of hours.
"Hmm… I see. Is it just a coincidence? The report your friend mentioned a week ago and the time that we were assigned to assassinate Dae are nearly identical."
"It's strange, though. I never heard any reports about Cascabel during my time in the army, and based on Marin's reaction, this is the first time she's come into something like this. It's not like she will find anything here, anyway. Did you find anything on your end?"
"Two things. First, I found the location where the underground information broker resides. People say his information's accurate and extensive." I raise my eyebrows upon hearing that, thinking about how Marin and company would eventually head there. "Second, in regards toward our secondary objective… Apparently the only place with a collection of books is in the castle."
"That's convenient. We'll eventually need to head to the castle anyway to drop off Irene. We still have some time before the speech. Let's head to that broker now," I suggest. I gesture my head toward Irene, who is still peacefully asleep and ask, "Should we bring her this time?"
Leila glances at Irene before answering, "No… The place we're headed to could taint her eyes. We'll return here later to pick her up."
"Alright, lead the way," I say while gesturing my hand toward the hallway. Leila locks the door again before we head out. We walk side by side as she indicates which turns to make.
In about twenty minutes of casual walking, the number of people on the street gradually decreases as the general sanitation of the area decreases. The houses nearby are crudely built, and there are people dressed in dirty, ragged clothes. The air smells like a combination of sweat, grease, and filth. This place isn't very social either; everyone seems to be in the dumps. There's a woman and a child close by. The woman has dark circles under her eyes and general health probably just a little better than Utna, who I met earlier today. However, the child looks much healthier, but only physically; his eyes look dead, like the mother.
Subsequently, there's another young boy nearby after another minute of walking. I contemplate on approaching him, but I refrain when a man comes out of the alleyway next to the boy. He walks away while clipping on his belt. With the shadow of another person in the alleyway, I avert my eyes from the familiar scenery. I turn my head toward Leila and ask, "Hey, how much farther?"
"It's in that broken building over there," she answers and points to a nearby structure without a door. Laughter and many pairs of footsteps echo in the building. Shortly after, a group of six kids runs out of the building. Smiling, they run into the distance. "What're you doing? Let's go."
Inside the building, we cross a couple of hallways, before turning towards a room without a door. There's a well-dressed middle-aged man behind a counter inside the room. There are toys on display on tables scattered across the room. I cock an eyebrow as I inspect the entire room. A poorly stitched doll of a young girl catches my eye. The man asks, "Are you looking to buy that doll, sir?"
"No, he will not," Leila responds as she gives me a glare. I put down the doll and then move closer to her. "Do you sell flutes?"
I knit my eyebrows. The man smiles before he replies, "No, I don't."
"I would like to buy this," Leila says as she picks up a stuffed animal of a lion.
"That will be 15 gold coins."
"Very well."
"Wait, what?!" I exclaim, feeling that something can't be right when I think back to the misunderstanding I had earlier with the two men. Subsequently, Leila puts down the stuffed animal, takes out 15 silver coins out of her backpack, and then drops them on the counter. The man takes it and then walks toward a back door.
"Right this way," he says as he opens the door. We follow him into the room that appears to be a storage place. He walks over to a stack of boxes and then begins to stack them on an empty space two feet beside it. When he picks up the last box, a trap door is revealed. "Please put the boxes back when you're done."
He walks back toward the other room and then closes the door behind him. I sigh and shake my head. "Is all this really necessary?"
"Don't ask questions," Leila says as she opens the trap door, revealing a ladder that leads down. She goes down first, and I follow. We find ourselves in a dimly lit small room with no one in it.
"Hey, are you sure this is the right place?"
"It should be…" she mutters while looking around. I survey the room too, finding that this room is made out of stone instead of wood. There are several barrels, boxes, and bags scattered about, but the only thing I find peculiar is the small opening in the wall, probably large enough to fit a baby at best.
"What do you folks want to know?" an elderly voice resounds from the other side of the hole. It's an old man with wrinkly skin. Leila and I briefly glance at each other and then nod our heads before turning back toward the hole.
"Tell us everything you know about Velyn," I respond.
"Hmm… That's going to take a long time… Can you be more specific?"
"Just tell us anything unusual you know that happened involving him in the past four years. We're also curious about the missing girl incident."
"The missing girl incident… The only thing I know about that is that Velyn investigated it three years ago. At some point, he stopped and concluded that it wouldn't happen again for unknown reasons. Another strange thing that happened is that he fired all the generals except Dae, and he replaced the ones he fired with new ones. I'm sure everyone has long forgotten about this already.
"If there's anything unusual…it would have to be the last month of last year; about six months ago. A source told me that he saw Velyn disguised in commoner clothes leaving Byzia. A month after that, he suddenly announced higher taxes in his usual public announcement. In addition, the prince and his advisors who usually appeared with him were not present." I grab my chin and scrunch my eyebrows together, thinking about the information gathered so far.
Suddenly, it feels like a cold stare is watching from behind. I turn around to check, but there's no one. Leila asks, "What's wrong?"
"There's someone watching us…" I claim with worry as I walk toward the barrels in front of me. My heartbeat is racing when I stop in front of them for several seconds. I shove the barrels aside. A rat scurries away to a nearby rat hole. Leila laughs from behind me.
"A rat…really?"
"Sorry…" I apologize and turn around, sighing afterward.
"You said Velyn claimed that the girls wouldn't go missing anymore at some point… Did it turn out to be true?" Leila asks as I'm bringing my mind back to the task at hand.
"Surprisingly, yes. It may be why people are suspicious of him now as of recent events."
"What do you know about General Dae?" Leila inquires.
"He's a man with a strong sense of justice serving Velyn for the past 11 years. Dae was the only high ranking officer that even bothered to help us in the slums. He didn't care about money as he donated most of it to help the people survive in these parts. The word is that he's working with Osmir as of late, but I would never believe it."
I raise my eyebrows upon hearing his last remark. Thinking back to our earlier deduction that they had to be working together, I ask, "Why's that hard to believe?"
"My sources have been keeping track of the movements of anyone related to the army or Velyn in the past six months, and they never mentioned anything about Dae leaving the capital, until about a week ago. One source said he left the castle carrying a pink dress in hand. There haven't been any reports of him coming back since. As far as I know, Osmir never came to Byzia until two days ago when he raided the castle with his group."
I knit my eyebrows together before asking, "Who's Osmir…? What do you know about him?"
"I'm afraid I don't have any trustworthy information about him."
"But you do have some information… Let's hear it regardless whether you have confirmed it or not," I insist.
"Very well… Let's see…" The man ponders for a moment before continuing, "Someone thinks they saw someone resembling Osmir together with Seirus and Aurora a long time ago before they were known to be the prince and prince's fiancé. Someone has said that he's a spy from another country. Someone has even said that he's one of Velyn's bastard children." Leila looks at me with a smile and then moves her head closer to me.
"Kai, that should be enough," she whispers into my ear.
"What, did you figure something out?" I whisper back into her ear.
"Not exactly… I'll fill you in later. Irene must've woken up by now."
"Wait, let me ask one more thing." She cocks an eyebrow, but I ignore it and then turn back toward the hole in the wall. I stare into the man's eyes and ask, "Have you heard of anything Cascabel related in Xantho as of late? Any names…hideout locations…possible plans?"
"No. I don't know anything about that. You're the second person today to ask that," the man responds immediately. I decide to pursue it further.
I ask again, "Are you sure? We're willing to offer 20 gold coins if you know anything."
I figure Leila has caught on since she's not throwing a fit. I gulp when the man doesn't respond for several seconds. "Yes, I'm sure. I know nothing."
I smile upon hearing his response. I turn around and say, "Is that so? Thank you…"
I raise my eyebrows and then turn back around again. "I have an offer to make you."
"Oh, what is that?"
"Someone else will come later, probably today or tomorrow asking about Cascabel… We'll give you a gold coin if you pass off some information to them."
"You're telling me to lie? If I actually accept that offer of yours… Wouldn't that make the information I told you become unreliable?"
I frown and stay silent, realizing his dilemma. But after a few more seconds, I smile. "We're both members of Cascabel. After we leave here, we're gonna head out of Byzia through the north gate. You can even get some of your men to follow us to confirm it. Use this information as you see fit."
With that, I climb the ladder to the top. After Leila comes up, we close the trap door and then stack the boxes on top of it. With a worried expression on her face, Leila asks, "Are you sure that was a good idea?"
"It should be fine… We made sure not to reveal our names during out time down there. We'll just leave as I said we would and go far enough to make sure we aren't being followed. Then we loop around toward the south gate."
"He must have scouts located all over town. There's no way to know where they are, let alone avoiding their sights."
I pause for a second, thinking of a solution. "After we loop back into town, we'll immediately go to a clothing shop and purchase hooded cloaks."
"I see. Let's go then." And with that, we make our way towards the northern gates. "What do you think?"
I shake my head, knit my eyebrows, and then respond, "I'm not sure what to think… After what we just learned it's possible that Dae wasn't working with Osmir…but they could've had contact prior to the last six months… The only two things we can confirm is that Velyn secretly left the country to visit Irene and how Neso knew Irene's attire before our arrival… I can't make sense of anything else right now…"
I pause for a moment before asking, "How can we leave Irene without knowing anything?"
"Kai, what's going on with you…? Aren't you a little too attached to Irene?" She asks, blushing. "I know she reminds you of someone…"
I hesitate for a moment and then sigh. "Yeah… I told you a while back, right? About what happened three years ago… She reminds me of her…"
I close my eyes, replaying my last memory of her before it happened. After recalling what she looked like, I add, "No…she resembles her…"
"Resemble…? Are you sure you're not delusional? Believing too strongly in something…and you'll trick yourself into believing that it's true, despite the low probability of occurrence."
"Maybe I am… I realized earlier today that I still haven't moved on from that point…" I smile lightly, acknowledging that possibility.
"Kai, you very well know we can't stay with Irene forever. I've been following your lead up to this point, so get it together. We'll do our best to deliver Irene to safety, but don't hesitate."
"Yeah you're right…" I agree while broadening my smile. "Sorry about that. So, what about you? How do you make sense of all this? It sounded like you came up with something."
"Yes, my thoughts on the matter are aligned with yours regarding the majority of what we discovered. In addition, we can use the unreliable information about Osmir to our advantage as we visit the castle."
I raise my eyebrows, understanding her ploy. I suggest, "While we're doing that, we might as well use Irene too. She has an eye for people."
Leila smiles. "Sure, you know best."
And with that we continue toward the north gate, eventually leaving the city. We look behind us, making sure that no one is tailing us. Afterward, we go through the nearby forest, sooner or later reaching the southern gates again. Suddenly, I remember a promise I made to Irene yesterday. "You know, we should bring Irene around town… She's been holed up in that inn for a while now."
"Are you an idiot? She stands out too much."
I don't let up and think of something. "Alright. How about this? We'll get another cloak for Irene. I'm assuming she hasn't been to a city in her entire life, so let her explore a little. After this, she may as well be holed up in that castle forever."
She knits her eyebrows and then says, "If you insist…"
We find our way to a clothing store, getting slightly lost along the way. Luckily, the first store we find has the hooded cloaks we want. Leila purchases three of them for only a silver coin. It's actually cheaper than that, but Leila doesn't take her change, and we leave. After putting on our cloaks, we head back toward our room in 'Bolt's Inn'.
Irene is sitting on the bed, facing the window. I announce, "Irene, we have good news… We know Velyn is innocent for certain."
"Well, we already knew that!" Irene turns around and lashes at me with an angry expression on her face. I regret telling her that already.
I scratch my head and follow up in a gentler voice, "You're right… Well, we still have a little over an hour before Osmir's speech… Let's go shopping until then. We'll cover you, so buy anything you want!"
Irene jumps up from the bed. Her sour mood transforms into her usual energetic self as she exclaims, "Really?!"
"Yeah, put this on and let's go," I reply with a smile, holding the cloak in front of me. She grabs it, happily puts it on and then runs into the hallway.
"Come on! Let's go!" she exclaims, grinning as she jumps up and down. Leila is also smiling.
"Let's go then," I say with a smile.
"I'm right behind you." And with that, we leave the inn and then make our way toward the shopping area.
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Back for chapter 16 as promised!
I think you can just call it the forge every so often. You don't need the quotation marks and full name every time. The reader should know what you're referring to.
I would say 'waiting for him to return' as it avoids repeating the word 'back' in the sentence.
Earlier, when she says that he probably did something stupid like punch a wall, it gives the reader the impression she knows him really well. Would she not be likely to ask him more about Marin? She must have got the sense that he felt something for her whilst he was there? I find it hard to believe she would just brush past that topic.
This section reads a little awkwardly. Maybe play around and try to reword it?
I don't know why she asks him this.
He asked for gold coins didn't he?
I don't quite understand this sentence.
Other than the nitpicks I've drawn out, I can't see any real problems. I preferred the last chapter to this one, just because I think it flowed a lot better. It's like when you have a lot of information to give your reader, you propel forwards very quickly until it's all out. You have a whole chapter to convey the information you want, there's no need to rush it.
Hope this has been helpful and that your next chapters are easy to write!
Icy.
Hi there,
I don't have a huge amount of time right now so I'm going to review chapter 15 first and then hopefully I'll get a chance later this afternoon to come back and review chapter 16.
Firstly, I don't think someone can ask something nostalgically. This may just be me, but it didn't feel right. I would also remove one of the 'eyes' or reword the sentence somehow; the repetition of the word makes it sound clunky.
This is quite sudden, maybe you could make these reactions happen over a number of paragraphs rather than all at once?
I think when you say 'that part' you need to be more specific. Having his mind in the gutter? His humour? What do you mean by that?
This doesn't seem to continue well from the last sentence.
This looks like Kai is talking - just be careful with that.
Funny that the Phantom Swordsman is male. It seems an obvious guess even if he didn't know who it was.
That's all I really have for nitpicks. Your story seems to be progressing at a good rate, though there are time when I feel you've crammed too much into one paragraph. That should all sort itself out during your revisions though so I don't have much else to say for now. I like the way you write your characters and you've included a good amount of information without giving too much away. Having not read the chapters at the beginning of this I can't comment on character progression much, but it's good to see Kai meet someone from his past. It makes him more human to give him that kind of backstory.
Hope this is helpful in some way and I'll try and pop back later to do chapter 16.
Icy
I love it. Although there are a few bits that seem made to pad out the story, I am able to see how your characters seem like real people.