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earl grey tea with a dash of honey

by GrandWild


I don't remember leaving my great grandmother's house

for the last time.

I don't remember stepping out that familiar door

or walking down those steps 

I'd walked down a thousand times before,

but it must have happened

because I am not there now

and neither is she.

--

I don't remember the last time I spoke to her

or the last hug she gave me.

I remember how she felt, how she sounded,

but the precious moments escape me

because the anticipation of the next time remained.

Now my ears and my arms are empty.

--

I don't remember deciding I liked earl grey tea

with a dash of honey stirred in.

The sharp taste and the lingering sweetness

brings to mind past sips, but then the flavor fades

and I am left with a warm chest and a burned tongue.


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308 Reviews


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Sat Jan 16, 2021 1:36 pm
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Vulcanite says...



I loved reading this RavenLord it definitely is a nice poem, keep writing your real good at it. :D




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Thu Jan 14, 2021 6:07 pm
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Wow I really enjoyed this poem! I LOVED the last stanza the bittersweet warm chest and burned tongue. Really moving and great way to finish off. I also love the title name.




GrandWild says...


Thank you so much!



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Thu Jan 14, 2021 2:03 am
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whatchamacallit wrote a review...



Hi there RavenLord! I thought I'd stop by with a quick review on this touching poem <3

I love how simple and to-the-point this poem is. You don't use any fancy language or elaborate imagery and it's so much stronger because of that. But where you do choose to use imagery, it's concise, clean, and very impactful. The overall effect is that it comes across as very down-to-earth - and I can tell this writing comes straight from the heart.

I also like your repetition of the phrase "I don't remember"; as the narrator recalls all the different things they can't remember, you can really sense their regret, and it builds up all the way to the end of the poem.

I remember how she felt, how she sounded,

but the precious moments escape me

because the anticipation of the next time remained.

Now my ears and my arms are empty.

^This is one of my favourite parts of the poem. You capture the fact that people often remember someone but still don't have specific memories to hold on to and treasure, and the grief this can cause in retrospect <3 I also love the line "Now my ears and my arms are empty" - it's so poignant and simple yet hard-hitting. (Incredibly minor nitpick, but I think that line would flow even better without the "my" before "arms".)

The sharp taste and the lingering sweetness

brings to mind past sips, but then the flavor fades

and I am left with a warm chest and a burned tongue.

This is such a beautiful way to end the poem. I personally read it as a bit of a metaphor - the warm chest = the narrator's affection towards their grandmother, but the burned tongue = their regret at not having specific memories to remember and cherish. Whether that was your intended interpretation or not, it's certainly a very poetic way to close the poem and it conveys the bittersweet tone of the entire piece really well.

All in all, I really enjoyed reading this poem. I'm sorry I don't have any real constructive criticism, but it's already so effective and impactful as is! <3 I hope this still proves helpful in some way!

Keep writing c:

whatcha




GrandWild says...


Thank you so much for the review, whatcha! That was exactly what I was going for with the tea--kind of a bittersweet duality to both my memories and the taste of the tea.
As for the "my" in that one line, I did give it some thought before adding that specific word. It's difficult to articulate why I placed it there, but it does have a purpose.
Perhaps it's there to reflect a Romantic feeling that I've always loved. Not sure how to put it.
Anyway, thank you again!



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Wed Jan 13, 2021 11:53 pm
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izzywidgeon wrote a review...



..This is just-
okay, I'm not a tea-drinker, in fact I don't even like tea, but this..poem made me want it. Okay, okay, that's not the point.
I love that you hold the memories that you had with your great-grandmother so close. It makes me feel really warm and fuzzy. It's crazy how the most minute things can wash over us in such ways, right?

I don't really have much of a critique to give you - I just really liked this piece.

<3
IzzyWidgeon




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Wed Jan 13, 2021 6:16 pm
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stygianmoon17 wrote a review...



woooow you just posted this two minutes ago :P
I'm early for once lol,

Anyways- on to the review


❌❌❌ MINUSES ❌❌❌

The punctuation. The moments where that is the most just.. CLEAR, is in the first stanza. Second verse, full stop. Fifth verse, comma. Aaaaaand three verses later, a final verse and full stop. It sounds unimportant and useless to point such a small thing, but truly, it's soooo much more important than you think. First off, the rhythm. since the full stops are kinda all over the place, there's some unnecessary pauses and blanks that could be avoided, and the commas don't really help with the flow either, although the one in the first stanza was a huge relief. It's a minor issue, but it really disrupts the flow, so a bit of polishing on that would help this poem a lot.

✅✅✅ PLUSES ✅✅✅

Just.. WOW. I am so impressed !!!! the heart wrenching verses, the delicate and yet
nostalgia-inciting writing this has.. it's just absolutely touching ! Your style is immaculate, it has this airy feel to it, and yet it feels.. dusty almost. There's just such melancholy and other feelings that point to nostalgia, that it is simply a literal masterpiece. It has this bittersweetness to it, and that last line on the first stanza. Oh that last line. It completely breaks the calm and collected beginning of your poem and that's when the reader knows, that this is going to be one of those poems that stay on your mind for weeks. No, really, apart for some polishing to do, there's not much I have against this poem. Great poem and an even greater continuation to your writing 💜




GrandWild says...


I'm absolutely blown away by this review, stygian! I'm so glad this hit you. Thank you so, so much. I'll take the punctuation issues into account!




It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.
— Albus Dumbledore