How does he keep from screaming?
Does he save the tears for the dressing room,
Safe from prying eyes and flashing bulbs?
-sir-
Exasperated smiles leave the face lined
And sagging, shoulders droop with the weight
Of forced laughs and helpless shrugs.
-sir--no, stop-
Two hours of playing the jester to a pair of fools
Who take themselves to be kings,
-if you could just-
One can only imagine how a man does not abandon God
And flee broken into the dark.
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Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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125,005 Literary Works • 672,798 Reviews
too good
very much too good.
I don't have much to say except compliments if you don't mind ;_;
First of all, I'll have to say that your exaggeration here is perfect. Throughout the poem, the exaggeration shows the frustration and calm contempt of the author. "Tears for the dressing room" was a good touch. This part starts off with "How does he keep from screaming?" which really gets the reader's attention.
Here, you begin to push in the sympathy for the subject, which is nice.
Normally, in a poem like this, I wouldn't put a metaphor like this, but this metaphor is perfect.
And there, you have created the biggest exaggeration of all. Absolutely perfect. Although you make it sound like Chris Wallace is getting tortured. (Well, I guess moderating the presidential debates ARE torture-ish)
AND before I forget--
I love how you fill the spaces between each stanza.
Each one is a quote from Chris Wallace at the presidential debates (I watched both of them) and also gives the reader a bit of a background.
Anyways, this is an awesome poem! it is very much too good. it is the truth.
Bon Voyage!
-y0sH!
Thanks for the review!!
Amazing job! This poem even though it was short had so much power and emotion to it. You described the character Chris Wallace so well.
I could picture him in my mind so well when you said these lines.
"Exasperated smiles leave the face lined
And sagging, shoulders droop with the weight
Of forced laughs and helpless shrugs.
You made the poem even better with the frequent interruptions of "sir" and "if you could just." Which made the poem even poem sad, and it made me feel even worse for Chris Wallace.
You did an amazing job on this poem, it was so emotional and sad, and I can't wait to read what you write next.
Carpe diem,
LUNARGIRL
#Wallace2020
Oh my god...I wonder what the definition of "vacation' would be in this poem because I see a whole lot more than that. (Or maybe it's just my emo mind lol) Either way, poor Chris, dude deserves better! You've written this poem so well that I feel like this entire scene played through in my eyes.
One thing I loved: those inclusions of interrupted "sir"s in the middle of the poems, for me it made the scene a whole lot more scary and saddening.
Another thing I loved: the visuals man!
"Exasperated smiles leave the face lined
and sagging, shoulders droop with the weight
of forced laughs and helpless shrugs."
I FELT LIKE I REALLY SAW THE GUY WITH THOSE VERSES!
Thank you so much for sharing and keep growing <3
(P.S I realized a few hours after reading this poem that Chris Wallace is the actual guy who moderated yhe recent debates in the US and I'm cracking up now LOL hehe not from America so I didn't realize it sooner XD)
Hey I'm glad you loved the poem! Thank you for the review
You're most welcome!
Yes, yes he does, poor man ;-;