Dead End

by Okuro

Published August 10, 2014

In Poems

Red everywhere. He broke. I cried.

Alone. I ran. Never going back.

Nothing. Only entertainment. For their pleasure.

No more suffering; I am free.

Warning/beware dead end.

Comments & reviews · 3
thePoeToaster43 wrote a review Review · Aug 31, 2014

I liked this.

I can't figure out the meaning. Which is good, I love to be left thinking!
I like that it's short. (As many say "short and sweet".) (Or maybe it's "Short but sweet"...)

Anyways... My favorite line would have to be --- wait. I can't decide!
Darn you! Why couldn't you make one line a million times better compared to the rest of the poem?! Only kidding, great job. Truly.

7/10. (Totally a good thing!)

Good Luck To You!

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rainforest
Review
rainforest wrote a review Review · Aug 11, 2014

Hey there, Okuro! Unknown391625 here with another review!

Ok so, this is really good. It was pieced together well. It can slightly relate to bullying, which is a topic I talk about a lot. Anyhow, it is some form of poetry, forgot what it was called though. This is a very good poem. It is very dramatic which I love. You categorized the genres good. Same with the rating. I will look for more by you,Okuro! Don't give up and always write!

-Unknown391625

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Foxtail13
Review
Foxtail13 wrote a review Review · Aug 10, 2014

I think in this poem you could use more description. I know poems can be short but this doesn't show anything, no emotion, no explanation. It's very sudden and quick. I'm confused on why it's called dead end apart from the last sentence
- "Warning/beware dead end"
"I think you could include a lot more sensory description, more input on the poem's story line



Surround yourself with people who are serious about being writers, and who will tell you, ‘Hey—you can do better than this.’ Who will be critical of your work, but also supportive. And who will not be competitive in a negative way.
— Isabel Quintero