Red everywhere. He broke. I cried.
Alone. I ran. Never going back.
Nothing. Only entertainment. For their pleasure.
No more suffering; I am free.
Warning/beware dead end.
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Canary word: Present
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140,393 Literary Works • 673,151 Reviews
I liked this.
I can't figure out the meaning. Which is good, I love to be left thinking!
I like that it's short. (As many say "short and sweet".) (Or maybe it's "Short but sweet"...)
Anyways... My favorite line would have to be --- wait. I can't decide!
Darn you! Why couldn't you make one line a million times better compared to the rest of the poem?! Only kidding, great job. Truly.
7/10. (Totally a good thing!)
Good Luck To You!
Hey there, Okuro! Unknown391625 here with another review!
Ok so, this is really good. It was pieced together well. It can slightly relate to bullying, which is a topic I talk about a lot. Anyhow, it is some form of poetry, forgot what it was called though. This is a very good poem. It is very dramatic which I love. You categorized the genres good. Same with the rating. I will look for more by you,Okuro! Don't give up and always write!
-Unknown391625
I think in this poem you could use more description. I know poems can be short but this doesn't show anything, no emotion, no explanation. It's very sudden and quick. I'm confused on why it's called dead end apart from the last sentence
- "Warning/beware dead end"
"I think you could include a lot more sensory description, more input on the poem's story line