The colors return when he appears.
Too long have I waited
in blacks in whites in grays – now no longer part of the wheel – clinging to memories
when I used to smile and watch the flowers bloom around.
I’ve been like a caged animal, only seeing the pieces of the world available
hoping beyond hope for much more.
He brings the shades sweeping behind him.
And he steps closer, each pace stinging me from above
with vibrant yellows and reflective blues
while greens stain my ankles.
For the first time the raindrops make me smile,
yet I begin to cry…
He wipes the blues from my cheeks.
And when he touches me senses overload with blinding brilliance
as if nothing had happened.
His sound arms surrounding me I leave a broken past behind,
not a single red flashing in my vision…
He reaches for me.
And he leads me in the dance we know too well,
each step deliberate and meaningless to me
as we twirl and dip and travel and step
again and again without reason to stop…
He whispers what I cannot understand, steps away.
And the gray returns to my hair, the black to the sky, the white to the ground.
Each retreating step of his steals yet another beauty
that I had too little hours with
until the blindfold wholly covers the world to me.
He parts with a fleeting touch.
And I know he’ll forever hide the colors.
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Hello! It's me, ILoveBooks! Ready to have a review for your wonderful work of poem masterpiece.
That's a great one. I feel every little things here. And I'm glad it work on other people who read this. And I know more people will like this. You should continue on writing!
There are a few things I don't understand and I think it should be fix. But there's a part of me saying that maybe it was just like that. So I won't say anything anymore. It's great just the way it was.
Happy Review Day!
First of all, I like congratulate you for a wonderful poem. This is great. And I appreciate it. It give me thrills so much because seriously I badly need thrills for the past few days. Thanks for that!
Now shall we start the review?
First of all, this is amazing! It shows a lot of emotions. So many words describe so many emotions.
Your writing format is also great. So you don't need to change it. I hope your other poems or works are like this. The format calm me down so much.
I feel that when I close my eyes. I imagine myself I was there. I can feel everything and those little emotions. It's like I am also doing everything inside your poem. That's great news!
Anyway your title also give me thrills and it get my curiosity get the best of me. I was like wondering, What could be the topic? I wonder what is this. So I have no choice but click it and there I didn't regret reading this one.
Well that's all for my review. I hope you got my point. And I hope you continue on writing such great works.
Happy Review Day, again!
-ILoveBooks out.
This is so beautiful! I could see the colors you described, and the way he interacted with her. Each image in my mind was dazzling. Thank you for that. : )
Now there was only one line that didn't make a lot of sense:
"He whispers what I cannot understand, steps away."
It just doesn't flow and it's not really clear. I feel like it would make the end pop a little more! If you could look at it, great. If not, that's fine also.
Your writing was great and I feel like I was there. I never knew that you don't need so many words to describe so much emotion! I'm just blown away.
If you have any comments, feel free to tell me!
thanks again!
M