Breaking up with imaginary you:
I’ve always liked you
You are nice, pretty, and smart
But the you I imagined
I’ve loved them
They are brave, genius, loving, special, adventurous, witty, and loyal
I will still like you
Even though you have your flaws
Your awkwardness and confusing signs
Your conflicting actions and hurtful avoidances
I have yet to meet someone whose flaws I can bear more
Because when you’re fun, you’re very fun, and when you’re nice, you’re very nice.
But the imagined you?
I can’t love them anymore
It only hurts to compare you to them
It only hurts to grasp at an illusion
So I must let go of the hand of imagined you
I have loved them dearly
I have loved them more than anyone I had ever known
They have comforted me in my darkest hours
And been confident in me in my brightest
They have loved me deeply
They have trusted me more than anyone they had ever known
But you are not the imagined you
You are a girl
You are a high school crush
When I catch those glimpses of what seem to be imagined you
Those may simply be the false hopes of a desperate man
Or the hints of a greater future
Regardless, I can not love you.
And if I continue loving imagined you
I will continue chasing a mirage
Trying to get another glimpse of the impossible
So I am breaking up with imagined you
It is definitely not them, it’s me.
It is my fault for making them
It is my fault for believing in them
It is my fault for needing them.
And maybe we’ll meet again
But at this juncture
I am breaking up with imagined you
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140,121 Literary Works • 673,028 Reviews
Slubbs here with a review
I loved this so much! It was absolutely smashing!
The flow was perfect, I didn’t stumble at all.
This was such a capturing poem, I love the concept about viewing someone in a way then realizing they’re not the way you would like them to be.
I have to make this review short as I left it late again.
Overall I loved this poem it was extremely relatable and touching.
The way you ended it was fabulous, making the reader think maybe they should break up with the imaginary person.
I will definitely read and review more of your works. Keep writing!
~slubbs
Hey Andrew!
First of all, let me just say, you've got an intriguing title. When I first read the title, I knew I had to read it.
The theme is really relatable, how you meet someone, and then the them in your head becomes this whole, different, idealized version of the real them. And then when you actually realize what they're really like, it sort of hits you hard.
This is just my opinion, and I'm really sorry if this offends you in any way. I'm not sure if genius is the right word this line, maybe "smart" might work better:
This part is sooo sweet <3 :
I really liked how you end the poem:
On the whole, it was a wonderful, touching poem. Can't wait to read more of your work.
Keep writing. <3
Thanks for the review! I%u2019m glad you liked the end, I was proud of that section. I%u2019ll think about changing genius! If you know any words that mean smart but are even bigger, like genius or prodigy, I might use those to replace it.
Like
Hi MaybeAndrew!! I'm Anne here to review your work.
I absolutely loved the perspective in which your incredible poem is written.
MEANING
I can't agree more with it. Its amazing the way you've expressed it. Sometimes it also happens with me, that when I'm really desperate to love somebody, I create an 'imaginary you' so that it is easier for me. And that imaginary person is without any major flaws. And as you say, sometimes start to believe in them and need them. But eventually you realise that that is fake and we have to accept reality. I found those emotions very beautifully portrayed in the poem.
These lines were especially very heartwarming!!
Its 100% true !!
LANGUAGE
Even though the words were well chosen, some grammatical mistakes made the poem a little confusing in some places.
For example...
this broke the amazing flow of the poetry, because I had to read it twice to make sure I was reading correctly. There should be either 'I have' or just 'I've' and not I've have. If indeed the phrase exists though then I've never heard two haves together
Also here
I think you wanted to say 'You are, or you're' rather than your.
Apart from this, your poem was really engaging and fresh. I loved it.
Keep writing and thanks for sharing your work!!
Thanks for the review! Im glad you liked the poem. I agree that I think we as humans have a tendency to make up characters in our heads that aren%u2019t entirely true, but I think it%u2019s all the worse when you know the person for years and therefore begin to really feel like you need them, imagined or real. I%u2019ll make sure to make those grammatical changes!
Glad it helped!
Hey there! I like the unique perspective of this poem. You've dug into some great insight with this topic. I like how you've showed the way a person can easily fall for their own created perception of another rather than that person's true qualities. The "imaginary you" does tend to be pretty flawless and unrealistic in comparison. Possibly the biggest thing I appreciate about this poem is that you make the point of how important it is to let go of that "imaginary you."
Your formatting is clear, so great job there. I did notice a few grammar things though. In the line beginning with, "Because when your fun...." The places here where you've written "your" should be corrected to "you're". I also noticed you switched some between the verb tenses "have" and "had," which end up in overall verb tense inconsistency. I'd suggest keeping an eye open for that kind of thing in the future.
Overall, this is a really good work. Thanks for sharing your talent! Keep it up!
Thanks for the review! I will make the grammatical changes!
This poem hit a spot in my heart, as someone who has gone through a break up this year. Although my situation does not align too much with the story of the poem, I can relate with that sort of idealization you can have for someone you care about, even love.
I also feel like the structure of the poem: specifically it's lack of adhering to the stereotypical rules of poetry, at least that's how the poem appears in my opinion, better communicates the emotion of the poem. I feel if it were structured with rhyme for example, it probably wouldn't have hit me as much. It feels very raw, almost like it's something you would read in someone's diary. The poem feels real, and with a topic like this that's a good thing.
Keep up the good work!
Thanks for the review! What you said about it sounding like it%u2019s out of a diary was insightful, because I literally wrote it in my diary, XD, and then decided to post it.