I liked how poetic and beautiful your poem sounded. The way your character talks about missing someone and how they want that person to come back but will probably will never come back, made me feel moved for the person longing for the person that they love. My favorite part of your poem was the part where the character mentions how they do not want their love to go away and that this other person is the reason why their love stays. Up until the line "Your happiness is always worth it though." I liked this because the character is putting the happiness of the person that they love ahead of their own, and that shows compassion.
If I had to make any changes, and I'm stretching it, because I don't really see that it needs to be changed all that much, here is where I would make a few. First, I am not entirely clear on what kind of relationship the main character had with this love? How established was their love? I'm assuming it's a romantic love, but I'm not sure. I know that the person felt deeply for this person that they are writing about, but what was the level of their relationship? Second, what is the relationship between the main character, and the "he" person? Again, it's really not too big of a deal. I get the overall feeling of this poem, and it's that longing for a person that can't really find complete happiness without this love, but will do their best to live their life anyway. Good job and I look forward to reading other poems from you.
Points: 8
Reviews: 1505
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