-Demons of Darkness-
A/N: So guys, this is basically how I feel right now, I don't care if you want to help me or just leave me with my own problems, but I just don't know how to feel...
She stood on the bridge,
In silence and fear.
For the Demons of darkness
Had driven her here.
They cut her heart
Right out of her chest,
Making her believe,
That the demons knew best.
They were always there,
Sometimes just out of sight.
Waiting in the background,
Till the time was right.
These demons were destructive,
Knocking down the life she knew.
Hating everything about her,
She hated herself too.
These demons can't be seen,
But they're far from fairy tales.
They live inside your mind,
Their evilness prevails.
So on the bridge she stood,
About to end the fight.
Then she stopped and thought,
"I'll fight them one more night..."
*Sorry this was shorter than my other poems, I just don't know how to describe this.*
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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125,016 Literary Works • 672,851 Reviews
Wow, that's really good, I love it!
Man, you're just firing out these poems lately huh?
yeah, this one is because of something happening in my life
I battle with depression as well as it is a hard fight. Depression truly does feel like your being controlled by a dark force. I literally have no suggestions the poem is relatable and powerful. I’m in awe. If you ever need someone to talk to I’m always here <3. I may not know exactly what youre going through because everyone has there own unique type of torture but I struggle with depression too so I may relate.
@DemonGoddess
**SCREAMS IN WOW**
XD thanks
I really love how you formatted this poem and the words you chose! It's a very beautiful poem; I think it's because of how easily the words flow together when reading them.
If you ever need someone to talk to you, you can always send me a message. <3 Sometimes we go through really dark spots in our lives, but I promise it'll get better soon.
LAKE STOPPIT! Stop writing so well!
XD
I can't write poems for the life of me, so I don't have much criticism. I'll respect your wishes and not like the poem, but I have to say, you completely deserve your place in the literary spotlight. You are very talented. This poem reminded me of a Twenty One Pilots song, it's really good, and one of my favorite lines from it is "The dark's not taking prisoners tonight" I have that quote pinned on my wall and it's in my sketchbook. I relate to this poem on so many levels and I wish I could express myself as well as you do. You showed the inner struggle that goes on inside so many people, and I'm really happy that you turned it around some at the end. We all need to keep fighting against those demons, not listen to their lies, and not let the dark take any prisoners tonight.
Keep writing and keep fighting, friend.
Thanks, and I'm glad that you didn't like it, I know that everyone who have read it wants to like it so I get into Literary Spotlight, but I just don't want to have two spots open for only two people, that just doesn't seem fair. Maybe you should write a poem for me! Or maybe a story! You can say I was a co-author and just say, "Lake is a terrible person and a terrible writer!" XD That would be hilarious!!!!!! I just had to correct hilarious and the second option that came up was 'Hilario'!XD I don't even know what that means!
That would be funny, XD I can try to write a poem, at least I could give everyone a laugh. My rhythm is terrible! lol
I don't know what that means either, but for some reason I have the urge to shout it in the streets. "Hilario!" X'D
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXD I'm dying!!!!!!!!XDXDXD HILARIO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!XD
XD I did it, I wrote you a poem. I was thinking of your cat one when I wrote it and I wrote one about my dog. It's kind of horrible, lol
I'm not going to leave a critical review or anything, but I wanted to let you know that you always have someone out there who loves you, wants you to overcome whatever you may be going through with metaphorical demons. I know all too well how these feelings feel and especially how confusing they are. I am now an 18 year old who has suffered from depression and bad circumstances most of my life... what I can tell you from my own experience: It DOES get better.
Slightly more reviewy: I absolutely adore the form with your stanzas going from one side to the next, and the way your rhyme scheme is. You portray your feelings very well. I love your last line, "I'll fight them one more night", because of the way your poem goes, it seems as thiugh this is a repetition of several nights. This shows me that you want to keep fighting.
p.s: I know you asked not to like it, but I love your newest poem, so I hope you don't mind too much.
That's alright! I just don't want to have three of five poems on Literary Spotlight that are MINE and no one else's except for two! And yeah, I keep telling myself I won't end this for another night and I'll keep having hope. But it gets so much harder every day when there are people who wouldn't give a crap about you feeling that way. So I'm glad that my family here on YWS actually care about this. And it's not new or anything, I experienced this a year ago, it only went away for most of last year. But thank you for the review, I appreciate it!
Just don't ever be afraid to reach out to someone when you're feeling low. It's nothing to be ashamed of and not something you have to hide or keep to yourself. If it gets serious, reach out to someone, anyone. I'm glad you find comfort in YWS and the community on it. And I hope you feel better at some point!
This is not a review!
smile! did i make you smile? no? okay... cinnamon rolls, adorable fanfics, dank memes about our favorite bands, friends you can share with
I can honestly relate to this because I am in the same position every night too. (metaphorically)
are you smiling?
keep fighting for all of us!
idek:D
I started to smile when you said cinnamon rolls!XD But then I unsmiled, then smiled again, and now I ca't wipe it off my face, so you succeeded!
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED hehe i'm a secret cinnamon roll spy...
XD OMG STAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!! My mom has no idea why I'm laughing!!!!!!XD lol
lol but cinnamon rolls are precious AND IT"S MY DUTY (hehe) TO PROTECT THEM but you know what's even awesomer? (how am i a writer that's not even a word) GLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZE mwuahahaha GLAZZZZZZEEEE are you hungry now?
No...wanna know why?XD
sure, why?
I'M DYING FROM THE SUSPENSE I MUST KNOW
I just ate dinner...
oh...
but still...
CINNAMON ROLLS
XDXXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXXXXXXDDDDDDD I'm seriously dying!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You know what? I'm making it a club!
CR ARE JUST THAT IMPORTANT
YAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm the first one joining right after you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!XD
clubs/2814/wall YES
Do you watch Youtube???????
Yes (OMFG WHY WOULDN'T I? YT IS LIFE)
GOOD! JOIN MY CLUB!!!!!!! clubs/2792
@Flumadiddle @TheBlueCat @Lumi @snowmonkey9 @269609 @Danni88 @KatjaDawn @EternalRain @LKSpinoza @jemming17 @nickelgotyourback @WhosabellCanWrite @AnneTaylor @Iggy @saentiel @MJTucker @KatieC @Begstita1 @sheytato @emolemon @woahhitherepal @Omnom @CocoaCat @VegasLights @SqueakieSilverShadow
Don't like this please...I don't want to take up half of Literary Spotlight. It feels wrong.
i liked it then unliked it whoops haha
let me know if you want me to like it any point though pal
sorry I don't do requests, I like them