Young Writers Society

Love it! Too often I think of acrostic poems as a preschool activity, but you certainly done a great job at making a decent acrostic poem.

I interpret this as a person dying, and no one is there to call 911 for them. It's sort of upsetting, but amazing at the same time.

You did a fantastic job at writing an acrostic with numbers, that must have been so hard.

All that is left of me

Lost its reason to live.

Like a picked flower.

Wow, this is great! Generally acrostics can come off as very forced, but this one is very effortless. I love it. There are only a couple things that I would like to mention.

First of all, the first line makes me think of the Christmas carol Do You Hear What I Hear? and that's a little bit distracting, because then I sing it in the tune of the song. Maybe it's just me, but I would suggest rephrasing it to something like, "Can you feel it?" It's a bit more simple and still works with the poem.

Otherwise, there are a couple small grammar things. In a couple places, I would had one more word (a conjunction) to the end of the line, so that it flows into the next line effortlessly. Also, I'm fairly sure that there should be no comma after the word "naught".

Thank you so much for writing, I really enjoyed reading this!

This is a little creepy, and I love the last line. It must have been hard to write an accrostic with numbers, but I am glad to say it worked fine. The only problem is that, because it is accrostic, the lines don't fit quite as well as they could. But this is very nit-picky. Overall leaves me with a very good impression.
Hope you find this helpful,
Take That You Fiend!

Okay, so this was depressing in a way I can't even fathom - I think that happens when you end a poem in 'what should I do but die?'.
I only really have one point on this piece, which is that instead of using the number '1' in the poem, you should write it out as 'one'.

Otherwise I can't really critique this poem.