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Young Writers Society



Live Like Legends

by Euphory


I won't settle for cotton,

I want clouds

I won't settle for bonnets

I want crowns

I won't settle for liking,

I want eternal love

I won't settle for little things

because it isn't enough

I don't want my ashes to be buried 

under the ground

I want them to travel like stardust 

to space and all around

If I'm going to feel pain, 

I don't want shallow plain despair

I want melancholy running through me,

 with every single scar laid bare

I won't settle for lessons, 

I crave epiphanies

I won't settle for stars

I crave galaxies

I won't settle for flowers,

I crave Earth-sized gardens

I won't settle for endings,

I crave denouements

I don't want only Paris,

I want to rule the whole universe

I don't want to be a polyglot,

I want languages flowing from me like verse

I don't need my lover gorgeous

I don't want to just stare

I want to see all his dimensions, 

I want to give him my air

 I won't settle for an ordinary life,

 a house with a picket fence

I want to be stored in the world's archives

I want to live like legends


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93 Reviews


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Fri Dec 04, 2020 6:08 pm
starbean says...



I can almost completely relate to this poem! I want to be remembered, we want things to be the way we should be, I want to see everything, if something bad is going to happen, I don't want it to be a skinned knee, I want it to be something that will make an impact on my life. You know what else I want? A whole bunch of poems just like this! I can't get enough of it.




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93 Reviews


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Fri Dec 04, 2020 6:07 pm
starbean wrote a review...



I love this!




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Wed Nov 04, 2020 6:25 pm
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LUNARGIRL wrote a review...



I loved this poem so much, your tone was perfect, and it is very relatable. Everyone wants to be remembered, in one way or another. People want to be famous and live a great life. I really liked how every line started with, "I won't" or "I want", or going into more depth on what you want. One thing I have to say is that the switch of going between rhyming and not rhyming. It took away from the poem a couple times, so maybe try to make all of it rhyme or nothing rhyme. But I know it would be hard to make everything rhyme because your poem is so long. Besides that everything is great, your poem is very relatable, it has lots of power and emotion. Great job, can't wait to read what your write next!

Carpe diem,
LUNARGIRL




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Wed Oct 21, 2020 10:49 pm
Horisun wrote a review...



This is absolutely incredible! I adore the opening stanzas, and this entire thing just hits all the right spots! This is just too good to exist!
My one and only gripe is that you switch between using rhymes, and not using rhymes, that did take me out of the poem a few times. So maybe either continue rhyming, or don't at all.
But other than that small critique, I think this is really relatable to most everyone. We all want to be remembered, in some way or another, and I think this poem goes above and beyond to capturing that same feeling, so excellent job!
Keep on writing, and have a wonderful day!




Euphory says...


Yay, I'm so glad you enjoyed it so much!! I've tried my best to make sure everything rhymes well but there are some difficult words sprinkled there XD so I don't think I could change it but nonetheless, thank you so much for your review and kind words <3



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Tue Oct 20, 2020 12:25 pm
StudentAH wrote a review...



I LOVE... THIS.

My only gripe is that you seemed to have a line-by-line thing going on, with either two lines "I want ______, I don't want ______" or four lines, with the first two talking about what you don't want, and the next two talking about what you do.

That consistency was amazing to me!

I loved how this line in the middle of the poem was slightly different in that it had that four-line thing going on.

I don't want my ashes to be buried
under the ground
I want them to travel like stardust
to space and all around


I loved this line! I felt like it worked because it was sandwiched between the regular "I want, I don't want" pattern.

However towards the end, you did a 4-line and then another 4-line. And I felt like that almost took away from the impact of the last 4-liner.

Because the final line
I won't settle for an ordinary life,
a house with a picket fence
I want to be stored in the world's archives
I want to live like legends


had that much more meaning.

A nitpick of mine is that the lines about the lover with "eyes like emerald" doesn't flow as well as the rest of the poem. I also am unsure if its a reference, but maybe removing the quotes would make my brain not stop up on this line as much. If its a reference, leave it as it is. However, if its not one, I think since its a metaphor it doesn't need to be in "air quotes" and readers can understand that its not literal.

A part of me thinks that breaking up the subject matter of the lover into two separate ideas or just moving things around my fix it.

But it also may be that the line
I don't want a lover with "eyes like emerald"

was too long, given that the line above it was also quite long. And I liked that line being long, because it felt like it concluded the previous idea. But the next line getting long kind of threw my brain for a loop. Perhaps something that shuffled the lines around and evened out the length of the lines without loosing meaning would work.

But this is just an example. I think you at the end of the day are the only person who could truly "correct" your poem if you felt the need.

Criticisms aside, I honestly LOVE this poem. Its gold. It feels like something that "real poet" would write (should I even be referring to us as "non-poets"? :P but I hope you understand what I'm trying to say).

The idea is magnificent. I really can relate to the feeling that the narrator is describing. The narrator is a person who can feel many emotions and want the most extreme of them all, not just the plain and ordinary.

And the WAY you carried out the idea. The back-and-forth "I want, I don't want" general pattern was a perfect way to execute it. I've never seen it done this way before, and I love it! Its honestly one of the best poems I have read on here. Wonderful execution.




Euphory says...


First off, thank you so much for taking the time to write such a well thought out and encouraging review! I looked over my poem once again and decided to reduce the length of the lover verse while still conveying the intended meaning and I also tried extending the last 4-liner because I thought maybe when reading it, if it were to be longer, then the final line may provide a little more PUNCH! I hope you go through those parts again and let me know if you think the additions improved or worsened the poem! I'm always looking to be better at my craft, even if it means experimenting around a whole bunch!

Second, oh my god you're so motivating!! Reading what you loved about my poem really brought some light to my day and a little confidence in my writing skills!! It's such a deep honor to hear that you think that it is one of the best poems here! Thank you so much <33<3<3<3<3



StudentAH says...


Hey again, Euphoria8. So, I liked your original last 4 lines a lot better, I felt like they were amazing.

I definitely think "good-looking lover" made the flow better. However, I almost feel like what you mean to say is that you don't want your lover *just* good looking. So if you say "I don't want my lover good-looking" it sounds like you explicitly prefer a non-handsome partner. But the thing is, I know what you really mean is that you care not whether the lover is handsome or not.

Its tough, but I feel like the word "good-looking" isn't as formal and your poem was amazing in its use of high vocabulary.

Maybe... something like... Hmm... Maybe something as simple as "I don't want my lover's eyes like emerald." I'm not sure if you were referring to the lover's eyes or the narrators eyes when looking at the lover.

Maybe think about it for some time and come back. Because I loved the imagery of your original and I hope you can find a way to encompass the vocabulary that is kind of shiny, big, and magnificent, as well as keep the lines even.

In short I liked your original as it was, without the "because," and I think the simple change of that one line about the lover was good, but I hope you can still maintain the integrity of the poem.



Euphory says...


Okay so I've brought back the original lines! (Welcome back my darlings) aaandd I decided to revamp the lover part a little bit!

"I don't want my lover to be gorgeous/I don't want my lover merely charming
I don't want to be just true to him
I want him with all of his dimensions,
even give him my light when he's dim."

How does this sound? Prefer the original?



StudentAH says...


Actually when I look back at what you have written (about the good-looking lover), I like the original better. I wonder if you changed it to simply "I don't need a good-looking lover." or "I don't need my lover gorgeous."

It does diminish the want/don't want thing but it also keeps the integrity of the original poem. I very much like your line about giving him air :) in fact I generally like the original better than the new lines you cooked up, though the new lines are nice as well.

If you do want to use your new lines I wouldn't say "I don't want to be just true to him" because it could be interpreted wrong (like unfaithfulness). Maybe "I don't want to just a marvel at him."

But again I actually like the original, maybe you could just change "I don't want a good looking lover" to "I don't need my lover gorgeous" because it fits with the lines about giving him air, and I love that line.



Euphory says...


YASSSS I was actually thinking of "I don't need my lover gorgeous" but I wasn't sure if it would fit in with the restt but after adding it in I'm like super happy with it haha! Thank you so much for the help <333 couldn't have done it without you!



StudentAH says...


No problem! I love your poem and I want it the best :)



Euphory says...


Aww, that's so sweet <3<3<3<3<3<3



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Tue Oct 20, 2020 5:17 am
rida says...



OH MY GOD!! This is an AMAZING poem! One of the best I have read so far! You are a VERY talented poet! This poem is officially in my ‘my favourite poems and stories so far’ list. Keep on writing like this! I REALLY look forward to more of these poems!

:D :D :D




Euphory says...


Yayyyyyyy thank you so much!!! I'm so honoured to know that this is one of your favorites! Have a good day <3



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Mon Oct 19, 2020 5:11 pm



Oh my god, "with every single scar laid bare". That is an incredible line.




Euphory says...


Thank you! <3 I loved "heartache beyond compare", which you suggested, but I didn't want to copy you. But that is a really good line: ypu could use it in future poems of yours!



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Mon Oct 19, 2020 4:14 pm
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queenofportalverse wrote a review...



Hi Euphoria8! Just so you know, I am by no means a professional whatsoever, so for this review, take what you find helpful and ignore the rest.

"I want melancholy running through me,
you wouldn't like these things for me
but I don't care"

So I noticed that this section deviates from the rhyme pattern you have, which is fine if that is what you intended, but I feel like it would flow better if it matched the pattern. But I can see that it is hard to find a word that rhymes with despair but also matches the context of this section.An idea is,”I want melancholy running through me, I want heartache beyond compare”.

"I want to see all his dimensions,
I want to stop breathing and
give him my air"

If you wish to make this section match the flow you have in the rest of the poem, you could say “I want to see all his dimensions, I want to give him my air.” It would be more concise and flow better, but I understand if this differentiation was intentional.

"I don't want my ashes to be buried
under a ground"

Did you mean, “under the ground”?

"I don't want a lover with colors in their eyes
I don't want to just stare"

This line didn’t really make sense to me, because everyone has color in their eyes. But what this line reminded me of was how writers often over-describe eye color even when that is not the first thing you notice about a person. If you thought of this too, you could say something like, “I don’t want a lover with eyes like oceans”, or another stereotypical comparison to show that you don’t care about a dramatic description of their eyes, you care about so much more than that.

"I won't settle for hats,
I want crowns"

I feel like the word hats doesn’t really match the epic, dramatic style of this poem. Maybe try “I won’t settle for tiaras, I want crowns”, or something more dramatic. This isn’t really important, just a stylistic thing that you can take or leave!

Here is my favorite section from your piece:

"I won't settle for liking,
I want eternal love
I won't settle for little things
because it isn't enough
I don't want my ashes to be buried
under a ground
I want them to travel like stardust
to space and all around"

I love this because it really captures the longing and yearning for greatness and a lasting legacy. I can feel the frustration and determination to get the most out of life and beyond that.
Thank you for sharing your work. The world needs more storytellers like you.




Euphory says...


Wow, I'm so happy you were able to find a lot of things to critique in my poem! It really makes me weirdly joyful to think that there is a whole way for me to go before becoming an awesome writer XD

Yessss I agree with everything you said here, I can't believe I didn't notice these things! I've gone through it once more and done the necessary changes so I hope the poem's a whole lot better to read now!

I'm beyond glad that the message at the heart of the poem reached you, it's great to know there are people who feel this way as well! Thank you so so much for the kind words and review <3





I'm so glad you found my review helpful!



Euphory says...


<3




It's hard to enjoy practical jokes when your whole life feels like one.
— Rick Riordan, The Last Olympian