I walk alone and
I walk all alone.
No one stands beside me and
I stand beside no one.
I walk in the path all lone but gay,
Following the road wherever it goes.
I give no one a
Second chance as I am,
Already carrying deep wounds
That I believe,
The time will heal.
All come and go
Passing right by me.
I look at none
And no one looks at me.
I am on my own, lone and gay
And always have been.
Following the light
That seeps through the
Darkest of the deep corners.
I am as cold as ice but
Still as bright as sunshine ‘cause
There is a fire still burning in me.
I give no one
A second chance
I carry everything
On my own,
Feelings, wounds and scars,
They all belong to me.
At night I rest under the stars
And go again on my own
Opening many doors that are
In there “somewhere”.
When a new day starts,
I resume my journey.
I keep traveling,
Through the old and the new,
Memories, feelings and people.
And, I still travel again and again
Because life is a journey.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
140,763 Literary Works • 673,687 Reviews
Hey there. I really don't know much about reviewing poetry, but I'll give it a go.
First off, I agree with zaid; the feeling and the idea are both great, but it could use a little bit of color. Maybe a word here and there that just reaches out and grabs the reader.
I really like the theme of this poem; it shows that you can have burdens and scars, but you don't have to let them get you down. It's very encouraging, almost optimistic. One of the great things about poetry is that you can give the reader something that they identify with; I think you accomplished that quite well in this poem.
Only other thing I wanted to point out was the flow/rhythm. It was a little choppy at times, and there were a few lines that I had to re-read.
Overall, I liked it. Keep up the good work!
I actually used to be that way so it remind me of the past so you did a good job giving the reader and idea of the person.
It felt very meaningful and I think you did a good job!
Personally I would have made a few things rhyme but that's just me
You didna very good job and I hope you don't stop writing! I look forward to reading more of your work
Love Ella
I really like your ideas and the feeling that you've tried to put in it but try using more color words, words that will light up your poetry, Being plain and simple is awesome but too plain, is just too simple. I hope you take my advice and keep up the good job.
Sincerely,
Zaid Ansari.