Hello there!
Review time:
Alright. I really liked this poem, not only is it great, but it is something that most teens can relate to. Wonderful poem idea! Now, there were some things that I noticed could have been changed...
The last line in your first stanza doesn't really sound right, I think it's just because of the words that you used. It's not that anything is grammatically incorrect, it just sounds a bit odd.
The only other thing I noticed was that when you wrote "Take this moment to breath" it should have said breathe instead of breath. I really like how you spaced out "In" and "Out" it kind of adds imagery.
I must say, you did a fantastic job. Keep it up!
Toodles.
Points: 1437
Reviews: 41
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