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Young Writers Society



The New Generation--Chapter Three: Thea and a Poem

by erilea


    A few minutes later, after Silena had given Sammy a sound scolding about moving Monopoly pieces, the five children started a new game. As the granddaughter of the wisdom goddess, Leia won, obviously. 

     Just when they had finished putting it up, the door opened. Their parents came in, each one talking with another. When they saw their kids, they stopped their chatter and smiled. "Hello, are you liking camp?" asked Annabeth. Leia was the first to nod earnestly, followed by the rest of her friends. Their parents all grinned.

     "I'm glad you like it." Jason peered down at them through his glasses. "It's getting a little late, and it's almost time for dinner. You guys can shower and change if you want, but we're going to show you to the dining pavilion."

     One by one, the children each agreed to shower before heading off to their cabins. Leia was deciding which cabin to stay in, caught between Poseidon and Athena, but finally she chose Poseidon. When she opened the door, her breath caught in her throat and she barely managed to hold back a scream. There, sitting on the bed, was a small girl. But she wasn't close to looking normal; she had thin red wings and rusty red hair with hints of brown. And to top it off, she had one eye staring at Leia, their intelligent brown orbs following her movements.

     "Who is this? Thea does not like intruders. No, Thea prefers books. Books are good. Intruders are bad." The girl, whose name appeared to be Thea, fluttered around nervously, looking warily at Leia.

     "Um...Thea, I'm Leia, daughter of Percy and Annabeth. Who are you?" she asked Thea. At Leia's parent's names, the winged girl looked up with interest.

     "Percy Jackson is good. I am Thea, daughter of Tyson and Ella. Daddy is a Cyclopes and Ella is harpy. I am both. Who is Annabeth?" Thea asked curiously.

     She was hard to follow, and Leia had a difficult time keeping up with her quick way of speaking and shaky tone. "Um, Percy's...wife." she managed to say. Thea nodded and preened her feathers carefully, digging around with her thin hands.

     She didn't say anything else, though, so Leia took her shower. As she slipped on her clothes and dried her hair, she noticed Thea acting even more distracted than usual, flying around the room and muttering phrases under her breath. Was there something wrong?

     "Thea...you look like something happened. Did--"

     "Vanquished foes will rise again. Be careful not to meet your end." Her voice was growing louder, as if Leia was hard of hearing.

     "Thea, what--"

     "The new generation shall find their way," Thea cried. "to an unknown place, hidden from the light of day." Leia waited for Thea to go on, becoming more and more worried.

     "But beware of troubles, forgotten long ago," Leia's cousin's voice had dropped to a whisper, but it didn't make Leia any less concerned. "because there, with the monsters, you will feel all alone." When she whispered the last line, her eyes flashed to her wings and she began preening again, as if nothing happened.

     "Thea, what just happened? What did you say?" Leia interrogated Thea. "What did that mean?"

     Her cousin hopped away, big brown eyes wide open. "Thea does not know."

     Leia clenched her fist, but didn't ask Thea anymore. Suddenly, a horn echoed through the camp. Looking out the window, she could see dozens of campers filing toward an area filled with wooden tables and benches. That must be the dining pavilion, Leia thought. And the horn must be the dinner bell. 

     It all seemed so queer that she was a daughter of two demigods. She had a Cyclopes-harpy hybrid for a cousin and that cousin had just spouted some type of poem. Leia sighed and hurriedly ran a comb through her hair. "Dinner's ready, Thea."

     "Thea knows. Thea does not like eating camp food. Thea will eat with her parents." And with that, she flew through the window.

     Leia shrugged and after pulling her hair into a braid, ran after the campers to eat. Once she got to the benches, she searched for her friends. They didn't seem to be anywhere, and after a few moments of looking she started to get frustrated.

     "Looking for someone?" the voice made Leia whirl around. Behind her was Festus, grinning like a madman. "Come over here! We're the awesome table." he said with enthusiasm. She couldn't help but grin as she sat down by Sammy.

     Looking at her parents reminded her of Thea's poem, which she had almost forgotten. Leia cleared her throat and looked up nervously. "Mom, Dad, I have something to tell y--"

     Her mother got up and wandered away, heading for the centaur in the middle of the room. Leia turned to her father, but he was busy trying to make "the dam ketchup come from the dam bottle." Leia sighed and turned back to her food. It smelled delicious, and she was sure that she would be inhaling it all if she actually had an appetite. She half-heartedly nibbled a piece of steak and slid her mashed potatoes around. What exactly had Thea said earlier?

     After what seemed like a century, the horn sounded again and everyone got up and whisked off to do some activity. Leia followed her friends, wherever they were going. Soon, she was caught up in laughter and talk, and didn't have time to think about Thea once.


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Sun Sep 27, 2015 2:35 am
EternalRain wrote a review...



Hi! Here for a short review this time.


I applaud you for the prophecy! It was awesome - you did a nice job with the same "voice" of words in Rick's prophecies and it rhymed nicely. However, a prophecy only has four lines and yours had six. I think you should find a way to eliminate two lines.

1. Vanquished foes will rise again. Love this line. I wonder who they will be?
2. Be wary of who you find a friend. Ooohhh!! Not another betrayal I hope. >.> And 'who' should be 'whom'. And this line and line #1 don't rhyme, so I'm a bit wary about that.
3. The new generation shall find their way This line seems fine!
4. And do not doubt they'll save the day. This one's good too, if not a little hard to roll on the tongue.
5. But beware of troubles, forgotten long ago In-ter-es-tinnngg!!
6. because without care, the heroes' path will no longer glow. Oh, yikes. I sense some foreshadowing here (well, technically that is what a prophecy is, lol).

I don't have much to comment on this chapter. It was a nice read, and I loved the 'dam' part, haha. Keep writing! on to the next chapter. :D

~ EternalRain




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Thu Sep 10, 2015 8:57 am
Dracula wrote a review...



Hey, Artemis! :)

after Silena had given Sammy a sounds scolding about moving Monopoly pieces,
Sound doesn't need an S. And of course Leia won.

Just when they had finished putting it up, the door opened.
Packing up? Setting up?

So I know that Leia would have met Jason many times before, but the whole Greek thing is new to her. I feel that some important details are missing. Leia should still be surprised to see Uncle (?) Jason at camp, and she should still be having her mindblown at everything that's happening. She just seemed unnaturally calm.

And to top it off, she had one eye staring at Leia, their intelligent brown orbs following her movements.
I AM SO HAPPY THAT YOU INCLUDED THEA!!!

Was their something wrong?
There*

Your prophecy is awesome! I love the bit about vanquished foes. I should be excited about that, yeah? But of course it's bad news, I'm still excited though. Anyway, it's a very nicely written prophecy. :)

This chapter was dam brilliant. ;)




erilea says...


Thanks! :D



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Thu Sep 10, 2015 12:02 am
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Europa wrote a review...



Hey! Once again, awesome job! I think you did a great job fitting the prophecy into your story, and i loved the "Dam ketchup, Dam bottle" bit. it made my fangirl heart soar! there were a few typos, but its nothing that you cant fix. i loved how you mande Thea act a little like Ella, it seemed to fit. there isnt much i would change about this, other than going through and checking for spelling mistakes. Keep writing!
Loves!
TheFantasy14





If I were a girl in a book, this would all be so easy.
— Jo March