,

I'm still enjoying it. but you need to be careful when typing you spell somethings wrong sometimes. Other wise on to your next chapter

"My stomach lurched, my shoulder stung, my pulse thumped in my ears, making my head ache worse."
I think you should put the word and between stung and my. I don't know and I'm not sure.

"! and incase your wondering, r-u-n-o-f-f-t was a quote from O Brother Where Art Thou?"

It should be in case. Sorry, I know it's not part of the story, but I just had to!

Overall, it's still pretty good. Like I warned, don't let your vampire end up like all the other vampires out there.

Yours truly,
Memento Mori

I. NITPICKS

Absynthe wrote:I kicked the blankets off. How am I going to do this? I pushed my self upright, trying to ignore the blistering head ache, and wiggled off the bed. I tiptoed across the cold wood floorboards, thanking all gods, known and unknown that my legs were working.

My eyes scanned the room, looking for a bag, and spotted my bulbous red yoga bag. I grabbed my yoga bag and yanked on the zipper until I jerked it free. I turned it upside down, dumping all of my things onto the floor. I reached over and pulled the doors of my dresser open and threw everything into the yoga bag.

I slung my leg over the window sill and shifted to an awkward crouch. I leaned out and looked down. The patio of my house was another story down, and a wrought iron fence lurked below my window. I shuddered and leaned back. I certainly didn't want to land on that.

I leaned out and peered up. The edge of the roof hung six feet up, barely within reach. I carefully leaned out into a standing position, gripping the top of the window for support. I reached for the roof, but couldn't reach. My foot slipped, I started to fall over, but caught my self at last second.

I carefully lowered myself down to the garage’s roof. Walking carefully I went to the other side.

“Elisabeth!” somebody called. They knew I was gone.. I panicked and jumped off, landing on my right foot. Exquisite pain shot up my leg. I cried out and leaned over to look at my foot. A nail had embedded itself in my heel and bent slightly. No! Ignore it, you have to move! Pull yourself together.