One misstep,
A wrong landing.
There goes,
Our happy ending.
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Canary word: Present
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137,690 Literary Works • 672,059 Reviews
i'l cach u strange????
Hello!
This was a simple little short poem.
I like how is just so expressive with so few words, and I also like how it's not a structured poem like a haiku or something.
I think you accurately described how one mistake can blow everything out of the water, and just ruin everything.
I really don't think there's anything wrong with your poem. Maybe it could be a little longer and more descriptive, but that would be destructive to the simplicity and the honesty that this has. Maybe adding more emotion would be nice, but again that would ruin this simplicity.
So that's all I got.
Great job, Keep writing!
~fortis
I"v always tried to come up with something short yet meaningful.
This piece has it all.
Kind of like it
Keep writing
I"v always tried to come up with something short yet meaningful.
This piece has it all.
Kind of like it
Keep writing
I"v always tried to come up with something short yet meaningful.
This piece has it all.
Kind of like it
Keep writing
Short, simple, but you put in a lot of meaning into it. I like poems like this, because even though they're short, they pack a lot of meaning. Read the lines, and then in between the lines. You left a lot of room in between the lines, and that is a great thing. It makes people really stop and think. Things that make people think are good, and so is this. Thanks for posting. =)