Young Writers Society

Heyy Okuro!

Its a very intellectual and a philosophical poem and a very good point to ponder upon.
The title is also very catchy and I liked it ^^
And also I liked the idea of posing a question at the start which makes the poem quite interesting to read and I thoroughly enjoyed reading this piece.

But there's one thing that was not understood while reading and that was:
"And it's all just the question to something else"
It didn't quite make sense when I read it at the first shot :3

But anyway, I would like to also mention the part that I liked in your poem ^^
"Has anything ever really been resolved?

Or has it just been covered up

And hidden from plain sight?

Who knows"

I totally liked the idea and hoping to see more of these types ^^

Good luck,
Keep writing!
SapphireFlames.

This is a vey philosophical poem here, and your points are all valid. However, given the philosophical basis, I do feel there is space for improvement, in terms of metaphors and similies. Also it would benifit from theat techneque of techneques, alliteration. However, despite this criticism, the message made alot of sense to me and was easy to relate to. For a long time "And it's all just the question to something else" was my argument against science (I have since moved on from this argument, there were too many flaws), and "Or has it just been covered up, And hidden from plain sight?" reminds me of the the C.I.A., and films like the Bourne films.
The last line is a good one, "Maybe life is a question with no real answer itself ", relating your theme to deeper world themes, and leaving it open ended, however this was spoiled for me due to the lack of a full stop. I know it sounds stupid and prattish, but it just felt wrong, and I realy like punctuation in poetry, it helps control the pace, ebb, and flow of the piece.
Sorry to sound so negitive, it realy is a beutiful deep poem, and I hope you found this helpful,
Take That You Fiend!

hiiii
so , hmhh..you wrote a very nice poem that i enjoyed reading , it was rhymy , simple , but meaningful, although i found it kinda short , but in general so good , i mostly liked the starting
cause i found it so strong .

Do you ever wonder if there is more to life?
Asking simple questions of why or how
Maybe there really isn't a solution to anything
And it's all just the question to something else

i just wanna tell you keep up the good work ..

smile

Hello!

I quite like this.

There wasn't much I saw that need fixing!
I would have loved for it to be a bit longer of a poem, but then again, the short nature of it kind of made it impactful.

I especially love this part:

Maybe there really isn't a solution to anything
And it's all just the question to something else.

Very thoughtful poem...which I just realized is the whole essence to the title
Well, in any case, this is definitely an idea that anyone can relate to. I don't think anyone is ever done questioning their life.

First thought, "And it's all just the question to something else." This line didn't make sense to me, grammatically.

But that's just a small technical point. Overall, I'd like to see more imagery in this poem. Poetry likes to employ the 5 senses to get the reader to see and feel what the author wants them to, in a more vivid way. Right now, the questions are vague, and don't reach a conclusion. If you plan to leave us with the idea that life is a question with no answer, the audience still needs to feel like they got something from this poem, like they're not left with the same questions that they had when they started. It feels a little bit like the poem just went in a circle.

Once again, the idea is very relatable. But as of right now, my relationship with the poem was nothing more than a handshake--"we agree. Life has questions."
Vivid imagery is the key to getting a deeper audience reaction. Make connections, comparisons, use the 5 senses, etc.

Oh, one last thought. I like the lack of periods. It feels inconclusive--like life. Nice choice.

...This is not a strange thought to me to, but I guess we're too young to know the real meaning behind life's too purpose...So to even try to truly answer your questions...We are gonna have to live life a little...Isnt it so?...BTW:A good one mate...Insightfull!!!