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NaPo 2019? Omg It's 2019.



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Mon Apr 01, 2019 1:47 am
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Aley says...



Yo, I have a few hours before April begins.
  





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Tue Apr 02, 2019 4:24 am
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Aley says...



Most of my classmates live on their own
Yearning for freedom from their parents

They wouldn't revel my position
Even those who used to be my friends
Not for sickness, not for years of fear

Years of hairpins
Expecting her to fall or not wake up
And now, we write together, an epic
Raise our souls to artistic
Satisfaction. Five books up, double that in words to go.

Acrostic
  





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Tue Apr 02, 2019 7:11 pm
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Holysocks says...



I think the first stanza is super relatable, Aley! Or, I think a lot of people probably can relate to those classmates. When you're at the age of... I don't know, 17 - 25 you're probably reallyyyyy wanting your own space, where no one can boss you around. XP But when I read it, it kinda seemed like the person commenting on the classmates that did that, it almost made me think that the person talking wanted to do that, but couldn't for some reason. Or, that the person talking loved living with their parents and didn't understand why someone would want to move away so soon. It's interesting, in any case! c:

I didn't really feel like each stanza was connected in any way, which- maybe I just like a more obvious theme poetry- or maybe I just didn't connect the same things that you're connecting. I mean the first lines of each, do have a pretty good feeling of transition into the next- so there is that sort of connection. But then the meat of each stanza doesn't really seem to be talking about the same things? Maybe that's just me though!

I'm looking forward to reading more in any case! C:
I hope it's a good joke because otherwise I'll have got it for nothing...

WARNING: Do not take grammar advice from me... EVER.
  





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Wed Apr 03, 2019 5:52 am
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Aley says...



Aley
curious _____ private _____ messy _____ isolated
Sister of ______ The Master of Her Domain, __ Hugo Wrangler, __ Hard Worker, __ Determinedly

Lover of ______ Shuichi and his hidden lives,__ the dragon,__ and her Ludicolo

Who feels nervous about ______ the future, __about dreams and life, supported through thin and thick blood,__ and mellow most of the time

Who fears ______ the sunlight is a demon dancing in her eyes,__ driving is a beast left untamed to the wilds,__ and failure of that last small leap before touching the ground at last

Who would like to see ______ how global warming changes life for real,
and the best place to watch a crashing world, __ or maybe just some path to the end of her own

Resident of __ Beneath of The Rock Central
Dream

Bio Structured Poem
  





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Wed Apr 03, 2019 6:32 pm
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Holysocks says...



Wow! Aley I have to admit, I went into this poem thinking I wasn't going to be a fan of the sort of chaotic layout- but I really like it! At first it was hard to follow, because I'd lose my place. But I loved how the beginning was sort of talking about more generic words, and then went into these really interesting images and what-not! C: My favourite line by far is:

the sunlight is a demon dancing in her eyes,
I hope it's a good joke because otherwise I'll have got it for nothing...

WARNING: Do not take grammar advice from me... EVER.
  





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Wed Apr 03, 2019 6:39 pm
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alliyah says...



OHhh are you doing different structures for each day in alphabetical order? I'm excited for that, if that's the case.

I think you elevated the bio structure poem - a lot of people learn those in grade-school, so it's a bit hard to not make them sound kind of juvenile, or just braggadocious, but you managed to make the poem hit these different avenues of personality that were really interesting - I'm also a fan of the "demons dancing" line, as well as "and the best place to watch a crashing world" - the ending lines feel like they dig deeper into some of the adjectives from the beginning and force the reader to go back and see if there's some continuity or added explanation.

Looking forward to reading your NaPo poems Aley!
but i don't think i can ever love someone
who doesn't understand that teal
is a different color than dark cyan.


  





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Thu Apr 04, 2019 4:24 am
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Aley says...



Thanks guys, yes @alliyah, you are right, I am doing structures alphabetically per day. To my ultimate horror though, Shadow Poetry seems to have lost all funding and been taken down TT_TT Now I have to rely on Poetry Soup Dx
  





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Thu Apr 04, 2019 4:37 am
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Aley says...



I grouse among the high nosebleeds
clawing closer, diving from trees
the landing ease of a rock
burying itself in a wake
shattering outward and a flake,
cold will break my graceful mock

[This is a new structure for me, please forgive my abuse of story XD]
https://www.writersdigest.com/whats-new ... oetic-form
cywydd llosgyrnog
  





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Fri Apr 05, 2019 4:53 am
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Aley says...



scraped feet on success
bleed wine against souls
crass bailiff screams, crack
vertebrae for coin
take out the man trash

Fire Drills failed,
real fire for-got,
safety meeting
revelations

don't com-plain
they fire
your doctor

gone, breaks,
weekends,

work



Diminished Hexaverse
  





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Fri Apr 05, 2019 5:40 pm
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Holysocks says...



Oh! I really like sorta how simple #3 is, but also how rich it is with cool images! I really like "the landing ease of a rock" for example- because I really like things that are like opposites? Like, you wouldn't expect a rock to be a nice place to land. But, it seems to be in here!

And #4 is quite interesting aswell. It has a lot more things being said in it that takes awhile for me to think about- like each line is a new idea/concept to wonder about and yeah c:
I hope it's a good joke because otherwise I'll have got it for nothing...

WARNING: Do not take grammar advice from me... EVER.
  





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Sat Apr 06, 2019 4:09 am
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Aley says...



The trees whisper
____go home, go home
__stranger among us

as I walk along their midnight path
flashlight wash along the stones
they crackle as I step
__go home, go home
____stranger, among us
___there is no promise
but I ignore it to worship the sounds

crickets and late night rustles
bushes and twigs, a distant hum
of life to whom I am familiar,
____go, home, go! home
_____stranger among us
____there is no promise
__that we will understand
___but you are welcome
  





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Sun Apr 07, 2019 2:43 am
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Aley says...



"You never know what you have until it was"
and I miss you, your encouragement
the listening, the stories, trips up the twists
dancing car lights through the tunnel
off the biker's petals as they charged

Glade Park, and they knew us, recognized
my father, his red cap, my tired smile
the way we spoke so confidently despite
our accents lingering like landmarks
across the country, a three day trip
two on the way home.

This is what I had, who I had,
and now? No memorial, no funeral,
a dispersion of earthly possessions
money, chairs, tables, art
but you are gone.

Elegy
  





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Mon Apr 08, 2019 3:15 am
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Holysocks says...



The tree one I find really sort of calming! Though I don't really understand why one minute the nature is telling the narrator to go home, and then at the very end it says that they're welcome? It's interesting but I wonder why the sudden change of heart?

And I think the next one is something that a lot of people can relate to. What it sounds like is some ones loved one passed away, and left their belongings to the narrator. But of course, at that point the narrator doesn't care about mere objects, and wishes for the thing that really matters to be back; the person!
I hope it's a good joke because otherwise I'll have got it for nothing...

WARNING: Do not take grammar advice from me... EVER.
  





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Tue Apr 09, 2019 2:34 am
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Aley says...



to
see
sleeping
puppies lie
quiet, touch their nose
with little paw-stretch curls and yawns
floppy ears, leather nose, too-big claws on paws dirty
from a day digging to China, searching for worms, and moles, and mice, my nommy monster,

Fibonacci
  





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Tue Apr 09, 2019 2:58 am
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Aley says...



Be kind whenever possible.
It is always possible.

- The Dalai Lama


They hit the breaks hard
swerved right at me
my car and body marred
too dizzy to clearly see,
be kind whenever possible.

She was crying, grabbing, barred
and I jostled myself free
the windows were a shard,
I pulled her from the tree
It is always possible.

  








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