Booty Shorts

i find your poem to be very funnyand well written. the flow was nice and i like the part about the cellulite

Please buy some decent clothing that's in your size.

Those cellulite bumps-they burn my eyes...

it made me bust out laughing. and the part abotu the priest was awesome!!

I shouldn't be looking? Well, you shouldn't be wearin'.
Those shorts you have on can make a priest start swearin'.

anyways, keep up the good work!!your poem was pretty good

I really liked this. I mean, I wear short shorts, but they cover everything that need to be covered. Some shorts just don't need to be worn. You put a point and added comedy into it, which was awesome. I really liked this.

I . . . I love you.

That's all I can say at the moment, so you must wait until I can catch my breath. All this laughing has to be a great ab work-out.

Okay. So. This was hilarious. Not only that, but it was completely true. I'm a girl, and indeed I do like to look nice for the menfolk, but I've always had a particular aversion to . . . er . . . short shorts. They don't even look good on the hot girls, much less the far more average girls described in this poem. The subject was fresh and quirky, something one really doesn't see enough of on here. So, as far as theme goes, this was spot-on.

I'm not going to rag all over the technical aspects of the poem, such as the slightly unsteady rhythm and occasional chopping off of g's (which sometimes gives the piece an awkward look and feel, like it's trying too hard to be rap). The message is what's important here, and it's good that it didn't take the backseat to elaborate rhyme and metre. The poem could stand a little cleaning up, but overall it's quite good.

Well done!

~Warrior Princess

Hahaha, I absolutely love this. Pure genius. Your rhythm is spot on and doesn't feel forced. I liked the style that you used; it was quite hilarious. Also, I agree with the overall message. Girls that wear really short shorts are only looking for the wrong kind of attention. Even though it is their choice to dress how they please. Your line,"You do it for guys? -Your motive is wrong. Because the kind of guys you'll get won't last that long-" is so true, and just made me laugh all the more. Very nice job here! Keep up the good work!

Rachael :)

Ha, I totally agree! Overall, nice poem. For my digging here...

Girl, take off those booty shorts.
They're not built to look cute, they're made for sports.

- This part doesn't make sense as far as "made for sports". I don't get it.

Otherwise, it's pretty good, and, nice picture you have. Made me lol.

Great message. Love it! It's kind of funny because my mom and I were just talking about this the other day! Thank you!!!

*like*

~Ktg

Dude, I'm laughin my as-I mean butt off!

hahaha! That's hilarious! I totally agree i cringe when people where 5 sizes too small in anything especially shorts! Great job! Love the cleaver rhymes especially the priest start swearing!

Everything else has been said, but I just have to say that a love it. Great rhythm and flow. Hilarious!

I loved this! haha it made me laugh all the way through. I really agree with the shorts thing- it really annoys me to see girls walking around wearing stuff like that. I'm never gonna wear mini shorts.

anyways, I loved the rhyming, I agree that it sounded like a rap, but I think that made it better.

No nitpicks! hooray!

Ahaha! This is actually quite funny because I was recently thinking of booty shorts this week. (Don't look at my gender sign, I'm a girl.) See, I bought a pair and tried them on and felt naked so I returned them thinking how girls were able to wear such tiny things. Now, I have some shorts but they're totally not as short as that and I'm a clean freak so I make sure my legs don't look...well, unpleasing. xD

Anyway, this poem was really fun and I loved the message to them.
I'm not much of poetry - reviewing person so I can't say much about this or give you any advice on it either but at least you know that someone rides the same boat! =]

Great poem!
-Shear

Omyyyy... I found someone who could understand me. Here in Phils, it's hot, everyone knows; but it's totally unnecessary still to wear booty shorts.

but those are a size six...

Those cellulite bumps<space>--they burn my eyes...

You do it for guys? -<unnecessary hyphen>Your motive is wrong.

Because the kind of guys you'll get won't last that long -

-and neither will those shorts-'cuz they'll start poppin'
And once they start, there ain't no stoppin'.

I like the transition here. HILARIOUS. I was really laughing. Man...

What I didn't like here is that it seems to be approving hot girls to wear booty shorts' cause they would fit them. But it may actually imply that even hot girls look ridiculous in booty shorts. I just don't know. But it was epic. I'm very glad you made a poem like this. It was straight to the point, but it was hilarious so it really wasn't that offending - I think.

Oh, yeah... I just want you to use dashes instead of hyphens. That's all. *likes*


Jash ♥

Absolutely loved it!! Seriously, I know what you mean. Great poem!

Um, this cracked me up. I'm seriously in love with this poem. To me the flow was good and the humor worked. I wish you would rap this and make a youtube video, I guarantee you would give at least a million hits! I really agree with your message as well. I have never understood booty shorts. No guy wants to see all that you're working with. You've got to keep a little mystery-that's true sexy-ness.

I wish I had more to say but you executed this really well. The grammar works because it fits the attitude of the poem and adds to the rhyming. None of your rhymes seemed to extreme or out of control which I think is good.

I know that you want to keep up with the "style",
but those are a size six.. and it's been a while...

That's my favorite part:) I think a lot of girls wear clothes that are way too tight, like did you paint those on or something? I understand having form fitting, but it's not a second skin...seriously.

Anyway, great job! If you ever need another review just let me know, I enjoy your writing!

-RL

I just wanted to thank you all for your support and reviews!
I really appreciate it!

-Jojo