Write the worst poem you can.

Improv'd Proposal Over Zoom, Or Why You Should(n't) Beat Around the Bush

shall I compare thee?
that would be a simile
though what exists to compare to thee
that would be so astute?

I think that you are like a tree
and we all know trees come in threes
and in the wintertime they freeze
which makes my meaning moot.

perhaps you are more like a bee
with honey bunches guaranteed
or no, those O's that cheery be
and crunch beneath my boot.

Aha! I know, you're like pea
sweet and little, round and free...
this isn't working. fine! Marry me!
what's this? oh. I'm on mute.

chicken scratch soup;

four parts of uninterpreted confusion,
(brooding, brooding, brooding)
and half a cup of celery,
to be clear, there is no earthly substitute for celery.

literally mix this up until it boils over,
and when all the liquid has been lost
to your kitchen counter,
take a spoon and stir, try not to sneeze
or breathe, just stir the soup
like your life depends on it. it doesn't,
but drama is good for cooking.
don't forget the chicken.

best served spinning in a circle, and dizzy.

uneven portion sizes ensure,
no one will understand
what you're attempting to do,
but that is exactly the point.

serve infrequently, without apology
for the unexpected lack of soup.

i am a jacket
and you are a shirt
you make all the racket
but i get the dirt

i am a shoe
and you are a sock
you stink up the room
but i get the walk

poetry is in everything

even in this '.'

so this is a poem

.............
.....
.............
.....
.............

dont you feel it

.it is the end.

.and it is a new beginning.

feeling about you
not to bad
just feeling
super shocked
and this
ends because I am Dead


Well something random came to my mind

Look
you're reading a poem
that I wrote
and like, yeah!
Words here
so many words
look more words
I am typing this.
the end!
Stop reading now.
Yeah.

alas | and other titles I wish came with poems to follow

does anyone actually
know how to write poetry
or are we all mostly just clicking the enter bar
haphazardly between thoughts
or
yep that's
actually maybe just me

--


i heard something clattering in my kitchen

and went to investigate,
but was mostly too afraid that
someone might be hiding in my kitchen cupboards,
so decided instead that the noise was most assuredly probably
a bumble-bee simply running into a mug left on my counter

A Castle

There was a castle
up on the hill
I didn't want to go there
but I looked at it still.

To be a traveler,
one needs a destination.
But my head is spinning
with blue indecision.

Going to castles
never does pay
you get really tired
and it's a cliché.

If only life could be
like the fairytale
inside Person A's head.

-- Person A

Hot
It’s hot
So hot
Why’s it so hot here
Why do people live here
Hot
So hot
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I love unicorns and puppies!!!!!!
Hooray hooray hoo

LuminescentAnt wrote:Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I love unicorns and puppies!!!!!!
Hooray hooray hoo

Two spoons in my mug,
because I don't like washing dishes.
One cup of coffee replaces another.
That's one fewer in my stack of dishes.
We call them dishes even though
they are mugs.

The worst poems are the ones that are someone trying to sound poetic and wise to make people think they're smarter than they really are. (But really that person is not very nice.) So... here ya go! (Pretend it's written by a shallow jerk.)

A deep, wistful meaning
The butterfly, 'tis flying over my head
and you say you want me dead,
but too perfect i be
for you to even see
the wonders inside my mind,
cleansing the world like a dog licks clean a rind,
get rid of the riff-raff and slay the day,
tis the day of me letting the greatest pave the way
and who be the greatest
but a heather
wind feather
dreaming of soup
full of plants from the garden of the eternals,
but the greatest be the rich
the ones who've ne'er fallen in the ditch
of poorness and sadness,
the normalest of them all full of badness
toward others to conquer the day
thats how you play
to-day
hey
I be the best poet
in the world today