I didn't read carefully enough and assumed that the mages were continuing to hide in the house, while they were out in the forest. This poses a problem because I had my character, a magekiller name Adam, hide in the house for a couple of days and eventually kidnap Lorei. As you can see the post is very long and detailed, and I.. don't know how to go about editing it xD
How's about we just mentally replace the word 'house' with tree etc. And then we can just move the plot on, with Lorei being kidnapped.
Does anyone else agree?
Elizabeth: "There will come a moment when you will have a chance to show it. To do the right thing." Jack: "I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by."
THE BEGINNING -Mages hiding with Lorei. -Lorei's dad likes mages -Mages found -Lorei's dad is killed (Or is he????) -Mages run away to Aunt Beth's house -Emmett and Lorei admit looove
FAIRLY RECENT -Some magekillers get a bit miffed at their new leader who is quite bossy -Magekillers find mages and plotplotplot -Mages hide... in a shed. -BIG FIGHT YAAAAAAAY. -Mages successfully defeat magekillers, mostly due to a sudden surge of power from Catherine [it can be inferred from this that she *likes* Cutter] -Most magekillers were harmed, notably Jessica, who was left in relative safety in Aunt Beth's house. -Cutter was also badly injured
THE BIT THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN, BUT DID. -All the mages were camping safely in the woods with Lorei after being teleported away[not sure about Aunt Beth's whereabouts] -Adam the Magekiller tracked the teleportation -A few days passed without event -Adam found the mages and kidnapped Lorei
NOW -Lorei is captured -magekillers are slightly dazed but mostly angry -ALL mages are sleeping, soon to awake.
Hopefully I didn't miss anything out, so everyone understands now and knows where their character is!!
Elizabeth: "There will come a moment when you will have a chance to show it. To do the right thing." Jack: "I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by."
I decide to go find a stream somewhere, because my throat was bone dry. It was the middle of the night, and everyone else was sleeping.
I walk for a little bit towards a rushing noise that sounded remotely like water. When I got there, I was pleased to find a little stream. Suddenly, I am grabbed from behind, and someone puts a hand over my mouth.
"Your coming with us." The girls voice I knew so well hissed in the dark. Struggle as a might, she doesn't release.
"You'd think they'd have someone protecting the mages who had some fight in her." A boy said.
"No, I knew from the second I saw her she had no gut." another girls voice chimes in.
"Put her in the car, tie her up." An older boy's voice says. I struggle a little harder, but they all just laugh.
I feel rough ropes tied around me.
"Tighter." the girls voice says. The ropes around my wrist tighten a little more. Some form of tape is put over my mouth. I was completely trapped.
>>>Can we just go with it, though? Just for the sake of keeping this going...<<<
Cutter,
It takes a while, but I recover. Somehow my friends got the magebullet out, and my arm heals just fine. While I'm healing, I catch Catherine looking at me, with what I think is fondness, several times. This makes me content, and by the time I'm well, I'm full of energy as well. Refugees we may be, but who says we can't have fun while we're on the run? The third or second night after we were tracked to Beth's house, I wake up early. I'm lying on the leaf-strewn ground, and I feel content, really at one with the world. 'Cept for the Magekillers. They annoyed the hell out of me. "Damn them for ruining my oneness," I mutter to myself.
"What was that, Cutter?" says a voice from somewhere near. I start, and look around. It's Catherine.
"Oh! Uh...nothin'" I say, blushing.
"Uh huh. Like I believe that," she says skeptically.
Our talking has accidentally woken the others.
"Will you two shut up?" says Ollie, his annoyance obvious.
"Sorry," I say, "I just woke u-"
"Where's Lorei?" says Millie suddenly.
And remember...A portkey can be any sort of harmless object...A football...or a dolphin. ~Snape, AVPM
"You are the egg, you are the chrysalis, you are the progeny. You are the rot that falls from stars." ~Will Henry, on Typhoeus magnificum
**I'll just put him with the captured Lorei and Adam and such. xD**
JONATHAN
He glared at the girl. She may not be a mage, but she was just as bad as one. She helped those filthy little killers.
And he needed to vent his anger on someone. And yet, he couldn't help but notice that she was a girl. Would he really hit a girl?
A mage girl, he'd killed. But that was different. They weren't really people. He needed to find a mage.
But they couldn't let this new girl go. No way. She helped the mages. No, she wasn't going to get away like this. The mages would try to rescue her and then Jonathan would kill them. Instantly.
The deaths of his parents were starting to haunt him now.
Revenge. It's what he needed.
MILLIE
She was starting to worry. Lorei was always so nice. Lorei would never leave them...so where was she?
The others seemed just as confused. Millie could almost feel the waves of distress from Emmett. This wasn't good.
Millie shivered and stood up. She was no longer tired or hungry or anything. She only felt concern. Cutter was hurt, bad at that, and Lorei was missing.
Nothing was going right.
Hermione, shut your ungodly, lopsided mouth and quit interrupting! 20 points from Gryffindor. You know, for the brightest witch of your age you can sure be a dumba** sometimes. *smiles* 10 points to Dumbledore!
"Ken, honestly," Adam rubs his temples, gently reaching out and pulling Ken's gun from her hands. She doesn't let go, but he tugs harder, and it slips from her fingers. "Come," he says loudly, and turns to leave the hallway. The three magekillers reluctantly follow him. Heading into the kitchen, he turns around and stares them down. "She obviously doesn't know where they are," he says. "If I managed to kidnap her from where they were originally hiding, she doesn't know where they are now," he rubs his forehead again in frustration. "It amazes me how stupid you all can be."
Ken steps forward and tries to stand taller. "Look, I just want to know where they are, okay? She probably knows something." Adam presses against her chest and pushes her backward. She stumbles into Jonathon, who catches her. "You didn't even tell us she was here, Adam. We wouldn't have known until Jessica wandered in to see if you were alright, since you were gone for nearly three days."
"You just disappeared," Jessica adds, her hands clinging to her forearms as she looks at the floor. "We assumed that the mages may have captured you. I knocked on your door to check if you were home each day you were gone." She pauses. Adam scratches the back of his head, glancing at his bare feet, and then to the hallway door. "What do you want us to do?"
Jonathon sighs. "Maybe we should leave the girl alone for now. The mages can't leave Rossain without her; they're bound to come and try to find her. Should we try to bargain with them?"
"If we can somehow contact them." Adam says. "Soon enough they'll contact us, I suppose." Again he peeks at the hallway door. "We shouldn't overwhelm her with all of us being here. I'll call you all back if I need any help, perhaps intimidating or containing her," he suggested. The three of them narrowed their eyes and looked at one another. "I promise."
"Oh well, since you promised," Jessica laughs bitterly, sarcasm dripping from her words. "That's absurd; she's not overwhelmed. She's just annoying. It should be ingrained into her head that her little mage friends deserve to die."
"It's not absurd, if anything, you are," Adam mumbles. "Whether or not they're mages, they're still her friends. I'm not preaching; I mercilessly kill dozens of mages every week. But don't be an idiot and say that 'she knows they should be dead.' That's ignorant and annoying. Perhaps they shouldn't hire magekillers at such a young age.. To be honest with you, you need more training. Especially you, Ken." Ken, who had been listening intently, began to fume.
"What? Me? Are you serious?" She approaches him again. "What's your problem?"
"Out," Adam says bluntly. "I don't want any of you here anymore. Leave. I will call you back later." With glares that could shatter glass, the three of them left, leaving Adam to look away from the front door, refusing to look at it until it closed. They were gone. He sighed and dropped into one of the chairs. He hated people. Oh, how he hated people.
"Where's Lorei?" Millie asked. Cutter and I had woken everyone up with our talking.
Everyone looked around tensely. I looked over at Emmett, who looked both scared and angry. We all knew who did it.
Emmett was the first to jump up, then me. We looked at each other for a second, talking to each other through thoughts.
Do you think...? I asked him. I didn't need to finish the sentence, though. He knew what I meant.
Yup. He sent his thoughts to me, and I also caught a feeling of extreme hatred.
That was all we needed. We started running as fast as we could to random place in the forest, the others right on our heals. We all knew that she either would've gotten up to go to the bathroom, get food or...I heard a stream nearby.
WATER! I thought. Emmett and Cutter both looked at me and ran to the stream. We looked around, but there were no signs of human life anywhere around.
"They were definitely here." Cutter said. He pointed to a gun on the forest floor.
"We all know Lorie doesn't carry a gun. She has a bunch of mages on her side! This probably fell out of one of their pockets." he said.
Emmett's face lit up for a split second, then his expression returned to anger.
"They're close enough that I can here their thoughts." he said. The closer we get, the clearer their thoughts are. That will help us find then. He growled, but didn't say why. I knew it was something that the magekillers were thinking.
We didn't wait up for the other before we started heading in the direction the magekillers went.
I am a fox, sly and quick. I never give up I never quit
"Let me go!" I demand once the others are gone. He doesn't respond.
"Did you hear me?" I demand again.
"Yes, and I chose not to respond." He says bitterly.
"Why the hell are you doing this?"
"You're bait, of sorts." He offered.
I sat there silently planning, trying to find a way to get myself free. I mentally cursed myself for not watching Indiana Jones or James Bond movies. That would have been so helpful. Maybe if I just talked enough I could tick him off and he would let me go.
Or maybe he'd shoot me. I needed a better plan. Suddenly, I watched a few rocks break a door. The mages had come.
Get away, I can take care of things myself. They will only capture you. I think, I know Cutter and Emmett are listening.
"Let me go!" The blonde girl yells at me. I look at her, biting my lip before I could smile. She was humorous. She wiggles in the chair, staring at me murderously. I don't say anything back to her. "Did you hear me?"
"I did, but I chose not to respond," I reply simply. She stares at the floor, mindlessly moving her ankles back and forth against the legs of the chair. She asks me why I had kidnapped her. "You're bait, of sorts," I offer. She looks back down at the carpet, her eyebrows furrowing. About to turn away, something tremendous bangs on my door.
In a flash I whip out my dagger and untape the girls legs, unlocking the handcuffs right after. Initially shocked and unmoving, she goes to run away, but I grasp both her wrists and, swiftly retrieving the same vial I did from my belt earlier, I forced the clear liquid down her throat. I didn't bother to wait for it to take effect when I threw her over my shoulder. She tried biting and clawing at my skin, but she was down within seconds. I hear another bang from the other side of the apartment. Turning the teleportation blocker on to block their ability to read my thoughts, I leap out my window with the girl on my back, closing it as I held steadily onto the outside sill, and swung her and my body onto the nearest fire escape.
The car was still outside. I hear the door forced open, and I'm already in the parking lot. Hastily I shove the girl into the passenger seat, and I climb over her, turning the ignition with my skeleton key. Barely seated properly, I harshly pressed the pedal and sped toward the police station. I look in the mirror to see the mages, horrified, running after my car. My teleportation blocker silently blinks on the outside of my pocket. The meter in the car slowly climbs to 70, 80, 90 miles per hour. I have to get out of here as quickly as possible.
The wheels screech as I turn a corner, and I can feel the blood rushing in my ears as I dodge dozens of beeping cars. The girl moves about on the other side of the car, bumping into the door and the glove compartment. She was obnoxious; it didn't matter how pretty and loving she was, she still remained an annoying teenage girl that I did not want to babysit right now. With one hand on the wheel, I carefully sit her up and snap her seatbelt across her chest. At least now she won't move around so goddamn much.
Wind whips the trees as I zoom by, the police station in view. I hurry out of the car, my heart still beating fast, and I unbuckle the girl and carry her inside. Several officers look at me, baffled, as I struggle for breath. Remembering what those mages did last time, I couldn't risk being found by them, alone, completely outnumbered and unprepared. I take out my cell phone, but decide to text only Jessica: "at the plice sttion. dnt brng jon or ken. the mages fnd me. i hav the girl. b careful."
Okay, I can't read that much! Just break it down so that it's not in those long paragraphs. The post might be longer, but it's easier to read. It takes way to long to read it like that because...well it's just confusing! You might think I'm an idiot for saying that, but I am an idiot, so HA!
Seriously, next time just break it down a little! PLEASE!!!
I am a fox, sly and quick. I never give up I never quit
