Make Up The Worst Possible Opening Line Ever

The day started off like it might be okay: the birds were singing, the sun was shining, everything was happy. But it quickly took a turn for the worse. To start off, I lost my favorite purple pen, which totally ruined school because I had to finish all my homework in that boring black pen. And at home, my annoying little brother stole my bra...(etc.)

Continue for fifteen pages before proceeding with real story--probably the main character falling in love with some hot *eighth* grader that she can never be with. xD

If you're thinking that this is going to be a good story, then you're wrong! It was all a dream, shazam!

Or:

Biggles the rabbit woke up to find himself sitting on a paperclip. Later, after an interesting, really cool scene that I haven't the imagination to write, he stepped over the woman's dead body. Now let me tell you about Biggles's favorite colors...

And a big green guy ate my parents and my house and my friends and my dog and worst of all, ate my cellphone.

The End.


*I win at life xD*

Nuh, I do:

*insert first line of Twilight here*

It felt like crap, probably because it was crap, and this realization made him think, "Oh, crap."

"Hi, I'm George W. Bush."

The very short woman with the very fat dog walked down the very long street in the very hot sun and dropped a very heavy book onto the very poorly-built sidewalk and made a very thin leash and hit any children passing by very hard and threw very dry peanuts at the adults passing by and... (this could go on forever as long as someone kept the and's and the very's going...hehe)

I never realized how hilarious life was until my mom died.

Although I laughed out loud at the

"Hi, I'm George W. Bush."

Worst opening line ever = "Hi, my name is Mary and I'm a very pretty girl with blonde hair and blue eyes. Otherwise, I guess you could say that I'm average."

He looked at me, and I felt as though he was peering into my soul.

What do you get when you put crap in a toilet, my life is what.

Let me think...

There was this guy who wore a piece of underwear and nothing else, he walked down a street. A car came by and knocked the guy onto the floor, the guy was pronounced dead, and I don't even know that guys name.

Master_Yoda wrote:Worst opening line ever = "Hi, my name is Mary and I'm a very pretty girl with blonde hair and blue eyes. Otherwise, I guess you could say that I'm average."

Just so you know, you're awesome xD
You too Classy.
*dies laughing*

This came about because I was so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, bored.

Okay, this is the worst opening line I can think of right now. Not only is it bad, but it annoys the hell out of me. It isn't really just one line, but I hope you can forgive me. It's more like an opening paragraph.

My name is Brittney, and my life sucks. Everything is so bad because I can't get a boyfriend, and without one, I'm worthless. I have long blonde hair and brown eyes, but I'm not nearly as pretty as my best friend, Courtney. She gets all the cutest guys, and she's so perfect. I wish I could be like her because then my life would be complete.

I almost died writing that *Feels betrayed by her own mind*

Okay, here's an opening line.

John Brown was the regional manager for Kenny Kow milk industries.

I have no idea where that came from, but it's awful