Make Up The Worst Possible Opening Line Ever

The worse opening line is the one where you accidentally print the last page before the first.

"She smiled, and kissed him, a kiss full of promise, of hope of the new life they were to lead.

The END."

Next page:

"A long long time ago, before..."

Once upon a time, there was a normal girl born in a normal world to normal parents and went to a normal school and made normal friends and did normal homework and got a normal boyfriend and got married in a normal fashion and had normal children and became a normal grandmother and had a normal death.

(I dare you to read this all in one breath, haha.)

The faeces slipped from my colon like a calf from a cow's womb.


*shudders at her own horribleness*

Argh, you've freaked me out, Ducati!

Mission Accomplished. I could write sort of a shamela version of something one day, i swear.

*shudders* please don't.
That was a whole other category of 'R' rated scariness.
*traumatised*

It was a dark and stormy night... khehehehehehe sorry guys. But to me it is.

Okay so like I totally hate my best friend whose name is like so stupid that I can't even write it but anyways she doesn't matter because this is my story not hers and I hate her and stuff even is if she was like my bestie from like K5.

That was utterly horrible. I can't believe how easy that was to come up with.

"No!" I screamed, raising my wand and shooting spell after spell at the beast. Nothing worked! It came closer and closer, sythe-like teeth glinting in the eerie moonlight, until it was so frighteningly close that I could feel its heavy, foul-smelling breath upon my heart-shaped face. Its red eyes were glinting with savage hunger and it opened its massive jaws to devour me--
I bolted up straight in bed. "It was only a nightmare, it was only a nightmare." I said to myself.

Technically that was more like an opening paragraph, but I had to diss the dream-fake-out opening. XD

Here goes:

I waited and waited and waited and waited.

My story is about two kids who play with dogs.
THE END
That was so bad.

This story was based on true events.



So cliche and bad - twist it a little!

It was a good way to die.

God, that sounded like Bella Swan... *gags*

"No." I tell that to Mom right away.

OR

If you're a sensitive person, put this book down, because [insert the main character's name] dies in the end.

…the feast was being prepared at the palace of ‘Apollyon, the King of the Evil Empire’.