Starstruck

***I gotta go***

Colt smiled as they ran from one ride to the other all laughing and hanging out. He had the most annoying thought that Journey wasn't having fun. But he wasn't sure.

* ugh, night*

**its ok**

7:00 PM

Journ slapped another mosquito off her arm as they walked back to the hotel, Trent was asleep on Colt's arm. She stared at him.

"What?" he smiled catching ehr staring at him.

"Nothing." she shook her head. "Just trying to remember." she said

"I wish there was something I could do to help." He said looking down at Trent. He really just wanted Journey to be happy, but this was something that was to far out of his control.

"When is Trent's birthday?" Journey asked.

"June twenty first." Colt replied with a smile. "He's getting bigger every day it seems too."

June 21st... She remembered that day. The day she gave birth to him. She looked up down and smiled.

"I remember that day." she said in a very low voice.

"What?" he asked. "Did you say you remember that day?" he asked.

she nodded. "The day I gave birth to him... it's still a little foggy but... I think I remember. I was just, terrified you weren't going to get there in time. You held my hand, it very painful... I sprained two of your fingers and your hand was really bruised... and thats it." she shrugged.

Colt grinned. "You were asleep the rest of the day. There isn't much else to remember. I thought my fingers were broke, not sprained, but you just called me whimpy after the doc said it was a sprain."

"Really?" She laughed.

"You said I was complaining about my fingers when you'd had to push a kid outta you." He laughed pulling her close after laying Trent down. He kissed her softly. "I'm glad you remembered."

Journey leaned into him as he put his arm aaround her shoulders. "It wasn't easy. I remember thinking about all the aweful things that could happen." she shook her head. "But none of it did. I'm sorry I can't remember much else." she said.

he kissed the top of her head. "It's OK. I'm greatful you can at least remember that." he said. "WE've been through alot together."

"I'll always love you, memory or not." He smiled. He looked at Trent and smiled. "We sure wiped him out!"


**all ih ad**

**I'm bored, I'm gonna write a long post lol**

Journey smiled and looked at Trent he was curled up in a ball and had a blanket on him he was drooling all over his pillow.

"Yeah. We did." she laughed.

**time skip! for 2 weeks**

Journey was home, cleaning, she hadn't got much back since the time at Disney world. Colt was downstairs cooking something and he warned her not to come down because it was a surprise. She was in their bedroom, looking through things, she knew she would remember something but she wasn't sure what. She saw a stack of hard back bound books, she opened one of them, it looked like it was years old, but when she opened it it was dated two months ago. Right before she lost her memory.

She turned the pages, looking at small sentences at a time. Before she had gotten into the accident. Before she lost everything. It was her personal journal. She read a page in her head.

December 30th

"I was happy, until this morning, Trent was finally getting his wish. I have no idea how to tell Colt, if he ever gets off work. When we fought this morning, I don't know what to really tell him. I can't tell him tonight. The doctor told me I was fine and that everything was progressing slowly and great. I'm not hiding it, I swear."

Journey read all this in her mind from the page. Then something fell out... she looked down it was a type of picture. She reached down as her eyes scaned over the picture. At the top right hand corner it said, 'Journey Rose. Pregnancy center.' then on the left hand corner it said the date. 'December 20th'
then on the back it said, Gender:Female

She felt tears well up in her eyes. She remembered, EVERYTHING. When she yelled at Colt for not being there for Trent, or her. She ran the red light, crashed, when she went into the hospital they told her she had lost her baby, her little girl. And she had blocked everything out, not on purpose of course. Journey closed the book and ran downstairs. Where Colt was cooking, she ran up to him and jumped on him. She held onto him tightly and clung to him with her legs.

"Colt, I'm so sorry." she screamed.


**blah**

Colt stood shocked for a second not reliezing what was going on. He hugged Journey tightly then held her where he could see her face. The look on her face told him that he shouldn't tease her for coming down stairs, something had happened.

"For what, love?" He asked searching her eyes. "You haven't done anything."

"I've done everything!" she cried clinging to him tighter.

"You got your memeory back?" He questioned. SHe nodded. "I still don't see how that could be bad." He said stroking her hair. "What are you sorry for?"

Journey shook from her own pain. She remembered she felt horrible.

"The baby, Colt. I lost the baby." she sobbed. "When I ran the red light, I killed the baby." she shook.

"The baby? What baby?" he asked.

"Colt, I was pregnant, with a little girl. I killed her," she cried.

Colt blinked and then held her close. "It's ok, Journey." He whispered.

"No it's not!" She cried. "I killed my little girl!"

"You didn't mean to, love." He said softly stroking her hair as tears pricked his eyes. He'd wanted another kid. But they were still young, they could make another. "It's ok." He whispered.

She pulled away. "No, it is NOT OK." she said wiping her eyes. "If I hadn't lost my temper if I had just talked to you, if I didn't get in the car... Oh God I can't do this." she said. The picture, she remembered she had a picture of the baby. She pulled it out and showed it to him.

"I found it in one of the journals. The picture was taken before I lost my memory." she said. "I'm sorry Colt."

Colt looked at the small black picture. His heart felt like it was pounding against needles. "You didn't know, Journey, you didn't know you'd wreck. I understand why you took off like that. If anything this is more my fault then yours. This is not your fault, it's mine." The words stabbed at his hear like a million knives. It really was his fault. If he hadn't let work takeover then he would've been here for his family and she would've told him abotu the baby a long time ago.


***Didn't know how'd she respond.***

**tis ok**

Journey shook her head. "It not your fault. I should have kept my cool. I should have told you. I knew I should have told you. I'm just happy to have remembered." she said.

"Me too." he kissed her. "We can have other children, Journey." he said

"I know, but what if we can't?" She asked looking up at him. "Or what if we can't have another girl?"

"Journey, relax, ok. We never know what can and can't be done. But I'm pretty sure at twenty two and twenty three we can have more kids." He said stroking her face.